


Trust

by mykkila09



Series: Trust [1]
Category: NCIS
Genre: 'Dead Air' Episode tag, AU, Complete, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Slash, Team break-up?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-01
Updated: 2013-09-08
Packaged: 2017-11-19 23:43:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 45,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/578929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mykkila09/pseuds/mykkila09
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if when Ziva and McGee had turned off the radio, Tony had ended up in a deadly situation and needed their help? Will his teammates realize something is wrong in time to save both their partner and the victim? And what happens when the real reason why Tony didn’t have any back-up is revealed? Will Team Gibbs survive the truth? Or will it be the end of them?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Scouting Mayhem

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** NCIS and all its affiliates belong to its creators Donald P. Bellisario and Don McGill, and CBS Television. No trademark or copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made from this. In other words, I **DO NOT** own.
> 
> “Speaking”  
>  _‘Thinking’_  
>  “Speaking over the phone”
> 
>  
> 
> __  
> **Trust is like a mirror; you can fix it if it’s broke, but you will always see the cracks in the reflection**  
> 

Tony sighed as he walked up to another house. He’d been going door to door all morning, pretending to be everything from a salesman to a security worker to an inspector and he was tired. As tired as he was, he couldn’t help but to shake his head as he remembered some of the people he had met. The most interesting one had definitely the dark-haired housewife who had answered the door in nothing but a robe and a blue bikini. He had to admit the woman was a bombshell and if it was any other time or he was someone else, he might’ve taken her up on her offer. But he had a job to do and he would get head slapped into the next three centuries by his boss, one Leroy Jethro Gibbs—a no nonsense former marine—if he didn’t do it.

He had just left another house, shaking his head at the teenage daughter yelling at her dad, and was walking across the street when he stopped suddenly. A familiar scent teased his nose and had him frowning. His head turned to scan his surroundings as he tried to figure out why he smelt that particular scent and where it was coming from. When he couldn’t pinpoint the location, he shook his head and decided to head to the next house.

He had just taken a couple of steps when the scent surrounded him again, this time more powerful than before. He could feel a twist in his gut as an image flashed in his mind and he knew then that something was seriously wrong. He turned around and scanned the houses he could see and when his eyes fell on one just three doors down, the feeling in his gut became stronger and without him realizing it, he started towards the house. 

Even as he walked, he radioed out to Ziva and McGee.

“Guys,” Tony said into the radio, “I’m gonna go and check out,” he mentally counted off the house numbers, “number 673. I’m getting a bad feeling.” Secure in the knowledge that his teammates knew where he was, he continued.

Tony’s pace increased as the feeling intensified even more. He had no idea what was going to happen, but he trusted his gut and he trusted the scent. He got the house and knocked on the door. He heard a crash and a curse and his hand moved to rest over his gun. The door opened and little girl, looking no older than three, poked her head out.

“Hi,” Tony smiled at her, “is your mommy or daddy home?”

Tearful dark blue eyes looked up at him and Tony’s instincts screamed at him.

The little girl nodded, but before she could say anything, she let out a cry as she was jerked back from the door and a man took her place.

“What do you want?” the man asked, his entire body tense.

“Hi,” Tony smiled despite the bad vibe he was picking up from the man, “My name is Antonio Lafferty—

“I don’t want whatever it is your selling,” the man grunted out and slammed the door shut.

Tony rocked back on his heels from the force of the slam, but he wasn’t going to give up so easily. He stood there, wondering what to do next when the next sound took the decision out of his hands; it was a cry of fear and pain.

Drawing his gun, Tony took a step back before he raised his foot and kicked the door in. His gun in front of him, he announced his presence. “NCIS!”

He heard grunts, followed by cries of pain and a woman’s voice begging someone to stop. Cautiously, Tony walked further into the house, his eyes taking in the disarrayed place; broken glass was on the floor, tables and chairs were overturned, a lamp was on the floor and there was a trail of blood. Heart pounding, Tony followed the blood, keeping his gun raised and steady in front of him. 

What he saw almost made him drop his gun in shock.

The man who had answered the door was over a woman; her entire face was a bloodied mess and her body, from what he could see, was littered with bruises. The little girl that had answered the door was hiding under a nearby table and he could see the bruise on her face, one that wasn’t there before. Anger rushed through him and his green eyes darkened with it.

“NCIS!” Tony shouted, “Step away from the woman and put your hands where I can see them!”

The man growled and looked over at Tony. “Get out of my house!”

“I can’t do that,” Tony replied, not lowering his gun for a second. “Take your hands off of her, put them in the air and step away.”

The man ignored Tony and turned back to the woman, with every intention of continuing with beating her.

Without even thinking on what he was about to do, Tony dropped his gun and charged the man, tackling him off of the woman. The two collided to the floor, falling through the glass table and Tony winced when he felt the shards cutting into his back. Ignoring his wounds, he focused on the man he was holding on to. He punched him, moving the man enough that he could push him off of him. He rolled away, quickly getting to his feet. 

“You’re going to regret that,” the man hissed. He charged Tony, catching him around his middle and slamming him into the wall.

Tony winced at the pain his back as he felt the shards of glass digging in even further. He brought his hand up and slammed his elbow into the man’s back before bringing his knee up, hitting him in his stomach. He then pushed the man back, and punched him in the jaw.

“OWW!” the man yelled out as he clutched at his jaw.

Tony panted out even as he hunched slightly over. His gaze shifted to where the woman and little girl and saw that neither had moved from their positions. He could tell that the woman needed help and fast. He radioed out to his teammates again.

“Ziva! McGee! I need backup and an ambulance! Hurry!”

~…~

“What do you think Tony’s doing?” Ziva asked as she cleaned her knife, not all that worried about her teammate. As far as she was concerned, this was just a routine stakeout.

“Probably hitting on some housewife,” McGee snorted, never taking his gaze off the crossword puzzle he was doing.

“Do you think we should turn the radio back on?” Ziva looked over at her teammate.

McGee looked up from his puzzle, “do you really want to hear Tony rambling? We get enough of it at the office.”

Ziva shook her head with a smile, “you are right. It has been peaceful, no?”

McGee chuckled and refocused on the puzzle as Ziva refocused on her knife.

~…~

While Ziva and McGee were discussing whether or not to turn the radio back on, Tony was fighting for his life. 

The man had his hands wrapped around Tony’s neck and he could feel his body wanting to drift into unconsciousness, but he fought it with all the strength he had left. He couldn’t black out now, not when the little girl was still in danger. A cursory glance a while ago had told him that the woman was too close death and in a matter of minutes, she’d be dead. 

Straining his arm, he finally managed to get a hold of the vase, silently rejoicing when he felt how heavy it was, and slammed it into the man’s head. 

The man fell back with a groan before collapsing to the floor.

Breathing heavily, Tony slowly slid down and rested against the wall. He took a deep breath and winced, before he started cataloguing his injuries. He knew he had a cut on his temple, but couldn’t tell how deep it really was, only that it was bleeding a lot; he gently probed his stomach and winced when he felt that at least two of his ribs were bruised, near cracking and one had actually cracked; he had a busted lip, his back was probably torn from the glass shards and then being slammed into the wall; his right leg, left shoulder and stomach were bleeding heavily from when the man had stabbed him with a jagged piece of glass; his left arm was hanging at angle, broken in the scuffle. 

The little girl whimpered and Tony opened his eyes and looked over at her. Sparing one final glance at the man, he carefully dragged his pain-filled body over to her.

“’S’ok,” he mumbled as he reached out a shaky hand—whimpering at the pain—to grab her little one in his. He didn’t really care about his injuries right now, all he wanted was to comfort her and make sure she was ok.

“Tu stai male,” the little girl whispered in Italian as she grabbed his hand, being careful not to squeeze too tight. _(You’re hurt)_

Tony knew he needed help; the man had taunted him earlier when he had heard Tony radio out for help to Ziva and McGee about how he had had them taken care of. The blood loss, and concussion from having his head slammed against something over and over, left Tony delirious and as such, he couldn’t remember that the man had never made a move to a phone or anything to call someone. 

He tried to straighten out his fingers on his right hand, but groaned as pain shot up his arm and he knew, two or more fingers were broken. Shifting to a sitting position—panting heavily and raggedly afterwards—Tony reached for his radio with his left hand, biting his lip to stop the scream from the pain that threatened to erupt. It’d be a miracle if his entire left hand was still usable. 

“Z-Ziva…M-McGee…I n-need help,” the sentence took a lot out of him and his breathing was heavier by the time he was done. After a few minutes, he got no reply and fear shot up his spine.

_‘No…they’re fine…they have to be.’_

He needed help. He knew that, and so did the little girl, and it was possible that his teammates needed help as well. There was only one person he knew could do that. 

“Andra’ tutto bene,” Tony mumbled, “Ho bisogno del tuo aiuto.” _(It’s going to be ok. I need your help.)_

The little girl looked at Tony with wide eyes and nodded slowly.

“Il mio telefono. Puoi andare a prenderlo?” Tony said between breaths as he gestured to where his cell phone lay discarded in the fight. _(My phone. Can you go for it?)_

The little girl looked to where the phone was before looking back at Tony and nodding. She gently let go of his hand and crawled over to where the phone was and grabbed it. She crawled back and sat down next to him, leaning into his side and held up the phone for him to see.

“Aprirlo,” Tony commanded gently and softly. _(Open it.)_

When she did that, Tony nodded, regretting it instantly when pain shot through his head, “Premi il numero uno e poi il tasto verde.” _(Press the number one, and then, the green button.)_

The girl did as she was told and Tony could hear the ringing on the other end. His eyes were slipping close, but he fought it as best as he could. When he heard the voice on the other end, relief went through his pain and injury filled body.

“B-Boss?”

~…~

Gibbs frowned as he jogged down the stairs and headed to his desk. He just had a meeting with the Director and throughout the whole thing, his gut was screaming at him.

Something was wrong.

But what it was, he didn’t know. 

He sat down at his desk and shuffled the papers on it before stopping. Looking up, his blue eyes moved around the bullpen, taking in the desks of his agents. The feeling got stronger.

Something was seriously wrong.

_‘Calm down Jethro and think; Abby is down in her lab, Ducky’s in autopsy, Tony, McGee and Ziva are out on a stakeout. A routine one at that.’_

The feeling persisted, especially when he thought on his agents out in the field. He had just decided to call them to check in, when his cell phone started ringing. He pulled it from his pocket and answered without checking.

“Gibbs.”

_“B-Boss?”_

At Tony’s voice, Gibbs straightened in his seat and frowned at the pain he could hear. “Tony?”

_“I’m…I’m in trouble boss.”_

Gibbs stood up. “Where are you Tony?”

_“I don’t…I d-don’t remember,” Tony replied._

Gibbs stood up at Tony’s reply; that was bad. If Tony couldn’t remember, that meant he had some kind of head injury. He could hear the heavy breathing and panic shot through him. The last time he heard Tony like that, was when his Senior Agent had the plague.

“Talk to me Tony,” Gibbs demanded even as he grabbed his gun and badge from his desk. “Where are you?”

_“Boss I…”_

Tony’s voice trailed off and Gibbs feared the worst. He could hear from Tony’s voice that he was close to losing consciousness. “Tony…listen to me. You need to stay awake. Do not fall asleep. DiNozzo, did you hear me? Do not fall asleep.” He paused when he got no reply. “DiNOZZO!”

_“I’m here.”_

Gibbs didn’t even bother masking the relief at his agent’s voice. “Stay with me Tony.”

Shifting his cell phone to his other hand, Gibbs picked up his desk phone and dialled the Forensic Lab. “Abby, I need you to run a trace on Tony’s phone…Abby, ABBY!...the trace?...Got it.”

He hung up and grabbed his keys before hurrying to the stairs, foregoing the elevator. “DiNozzo, you still with me?”

_“I’m…here…boss,” Tony said between breaths._

“Hang on Tony,” Gibbs repeated as he ran down the stairs and out to the parking lot where his car was parked. He got in and was speeding out in record time. As he drove, ignoring the honking from the other vehicles as he passed them recklessly, his mind went to his other agents, wondering if they were in trouble as well. He had to call them, but he couldn’t hang up on Tony. 

There was no doubt in his mind that him being on the phone was the only thing keeping Tony conscious. So, he swallowed his own feelings and did something he hated to do; he talked.

About everything and nothing, it didn’t matter, just as long as Tony heard his voice and knew he was still there and that he was coming.

Gibbs’ speed increased as he raced to where his agent was waiting for him.

_‘Hang on Tony…just hang on’_

~…~

McGee frowned as he looked down at his watch and then looked back up to where the houses were.

“Tony’s been gone a long time,” he remarked.

Ziva looked up at him. “Maybe he is still searching?”

“No,” McGee shook his head, “he should’ve been back by now.”

“Do you think something is wrong?” Ziva asked, raising a dark eyebrow. “Maybe this is one of his pranks.”

“I don’t know,” McGee looked around. “Tony’s immature and he pulls pranks a lot, but I’m not sure.”

Ziva said nothing as she reached down and turned the radio on. “Tony?”

Nothing was heard but static.

Ziva’s brows furrowed and she tried her teammate again, “Tony.”

McGee frowned over at her before he too tried to contact their fellow agent. “Come on Tony. If you’re mad we weren’t paying attention before, we get it, but isn’t this kind of childish?”

No reply.

“Tony, stop playing,” McGee said, “Answer back.”

After a few minutes, Ziva looked over at him, “McGee, I do not think he is playing.”

“Do you remember the last house he said he was at?” McGee asked as he grabbed his gun and badge from the under his seat.

“I think it was 513,” Ziva replied as she too grabbed her stuff.

They had just gotten out of the car when another car flew by them.

“Was that Gibbs’ car?” McGee stared after the car in shock.

“I think it was,” Ziva nodded.

“Something happened,” McGee said as he ducked back inside, Ziva following. Soon enough, they pulled out from their spot and went after their leader.

~…~

Tony’s breaths became even shallower. He could barely hear Gibbs talking on the phone, but forced himself to concentrate. He needed help and he needed it fast. Just as the thought completed itself, he heard the footsteps through the broken down front door.

“TONY!” Gibbs called out as he entered the house. He heard the laboured breathing and followed it, his eyes taking in the complete wreck of the room. He spotted his agent resting back against  
the far opposite corner of the room, with a little girl tucked into his side.

Saying nothing, Gibbs hurried over to Tony’s side, falling to his knees when he got there. “Tony.”

“H-Hey boss,” was all Tony said before he finally lost the fight and gave in to the darkness pulling at the edge of his mind.

“Shit!” Gibbs cursed as he reached up a hand to check Tony’s pulse. It was there, it was faint, but it was still there and he breathed a huge sigh of relief.

“Gibbs!”

“Boss!”

McGee and Ziva entered the house, but stopped suddenly and stared in shock at the scene in front them.

“Oh my God! Tony!” McGee stared at his teammate who was lying bloodied and unconscious on the floor.

Gibbs looked back at them briefly, his eyes quickly taking in their appearance. Something about this didn’t sit right with him. There was something off here, but he didn’t know what it was. However, those thoughts were pushed from his head as he refocused on Tony. He needed to get him out of there, but he didn’t think Tony would be able to wait for the ambulance.

Carefully and gently, he lifted Tony into his arms and went to stand, but was stopped by a slight resistance. He looked down and saw that the little girl was still holding on to Tony’s shirt.

“He needs help,” Gibbs spoke softly to her, not wanting to scare her. “I have to take him with me.”

The little girl whimpered as tears filled her eyes, not wanting to let the man that had protected her from her daddy out of her sight.

Gibbs seemed to realize it. “Come with me.” When she made no move to do so, he gently cajoled her, “It’s ok. I know. Tony protected you. You can come with me, that way, you can see him.”

Finally, after a brief staring contest, the little girl slowly let go of Tony’s shirt and walked over to stand as close to Gibbs as she could.

Satisfied, Gibbs turned and headed to the door. He looked at Ziva and McGee. “McGee, call ahead to Bethesda and tell them that I’m coming. Radio out to dispatch and clear the roads. I want nothing in my way to the hospital. When you’re done, secure this place and if that bastard is still alive, arrest him and get him back to NCIS. I’ll deal with him later.” The last part was said with such menace that both agents took a step away from their leader.

After passing out his orders, Gibbs quickly left the house, the little girl following him, and headed back to his car. Mindful of Tony’s injuries, he placed him in the backseat and buckled him in while the little girl sat in front. After making sure she was buckled in, he took off with a squeal of tires.

Back at the house, McGee and Ziva were silent as they did as they had been told. After handcuffing the man—bastard was still alive unfortunately, or fortunately— and McGee placing call out to Bethesda and dispatch, both agents turned to each other with horrified looks.

“What did we do McGee?” Ziva asked. Her heart was pounding as guilt ran through her.

McGee swallowed as he took in the scene of the room once more; the place looked like a bomb had gone off. Tony had been here, fighting for his life, while they had been in the car, deliberately cut off from him and oblivious to what had been happening. 

McGee staggered back into the wall as the guilt slammed into him. “We messed up Ziva…we messed up really bad.”


	2. Chapter 2

_**Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive** —Sir Walter Scott_

As Gibbs raced through the streets, he noticed the police cars blocking off the opposite traffic at every intersection and was thankful for it as his thoughts were not on his driving, but on the man lying in his back seat. 

The only thing he was concentrating on was getting Tony to the hospital as fast as possible so that he could get the help he needed. He could tell that his agent was near death’s door and that terrified him. He wasn’t the kind of man to admit something like that, to admit such fear, but right now, that’s all he was feeling; for the first time in as long as he could remember, he was scared.

The thought of Tony dying scared him. The last time he had felt this way was when Tony had had the plague; back then, he had felt so helpless and the entire time he had been locked in quarantine, all he had been able to think about was that Tony was dying, would die, if they didn’t find a way to save him. It wasn’t until he had been told that the Italian only had a 15% chance of surviving, that he had allowed his hope to build and he had felt his world restore itself.

He knew then though that the 15% was only that; a slight chance. You had to want to live. So he had done the only thing he could think of; he had ordered Tony not to die. He knew it would work because he gave Tony an order, the younger man always followed, sometimes blindly, but he did and he did it because he trusted Gibbs, he had faith in him and Tony hated letting him down.

Glancing up, Gibbs stared at his agent through the rear view mirror and silently ordered him not to die.

Ten minutes later, he was pulling into the emergency entrance at Bethesda. Before he was even out of the car, doctors were already there with a stretcher and were opening the back door to get Tony out.

Gibbs got out of the car and went to help them with Tony. 

“Careful,” the doctor instructed as they gently lifted Tony from the back seat and place him on the stretcher. “Get him inside and directly to ER 3.”

As Tony was being rushed inside, Gibbs turned back to his car and lifted the little girl out. Keeping his arms secured around her, he quickly made his way inside. He flashed his badge at the receptionist’s desk and asked where Tony had gone, not even bothering to hear the rest of whatever the woman was saying.

He took a seat in the waiting room and shifted the little girl in his arms so that she would be more comfortable. Glancing down at her, he frowned a little. She hadn’t spoken one word since they left the house. 

“Is she ok?” a nurse asked, gaining Gibbs’ attention.

“What?” Gibbs narrowed his eyes at her.

The nurse gestured to the little girl in his arms, “she’s covered in blood and there’s a bruise on her cheek. Let me take her and get her checked out.” She reached out to grab the girl’s arms.

The little girl whimpered and turned so that her face was buried in Gibbs’ chest and so that her arms could wrap around his neck.

“It’s ok,” the nurse cooed, but the girl shook her head and clung to Gibbs.

“I’ll do it,” Gibbs said as he stood up and made a motion for the nurse to go. When she did, he followed. 

Gibbs cleaned the blood off of the little girl and held her as the nurse tended to the bruise on her cheek. After they were done, Gibbs headed back to the waiting room. As he walking, he pulled out his phone and called Ducky, letting him know what was going on and to get Abby and then, he called Ziva and McGee. When he was done, he sat down in the chair with a sigh.

He tipped his head back on the wall and closed his eyes. He opened them when he felt the little girl shifting around until she was resting her head on his chest and he closed his eyes again.

“Agent Gibbs?” a man’s voice called out and Gibbs opened his eyes to see a doctor standing in front of him.

“I’m Doctor Scott Hale,” the man said. “I’ll be one of the doctors working on Agent DiNozzo.”

Gibbs straightened up in his seat, “Talk to me doc. How bad is it?”

“I’m going to be blunt,” Dr. Hale sighed as he took the seat next to Gibbs. “Agent DiNozzo is suffering from a multitude of injuries, and at least half of them are life threatening.”

As the doctor outlined each of Tony’s injuries, Gibbs felt something cold settle at the bottom of his stomach. Just how the hell did Tony manage to stay alive?

“We’ve already contacted Dr. Pitt,” Dr. Hale continued.

“Why?” Gibbs interrupted.

Dr. Hale looked at the agent in front of him, “Agent DiNozzo has severe internal bleeding and on top of that, a broken rib split off and part of it pierced his left lung. In his notes, it says that Agent DiNozzo survived the plague a few years ago, however the experience left him with scarred lungs. Because we’ll need to intubate him, we had to call in Dr. Pitt who was his doctor at the time and   
therefore, is more familiar with Agent DiNozzo’s medical work.

“Agent Gibbs, I’m going to be honest. Things are not looking good for Agent DiNozzo. His heart stopped twice before we managed to get him stable enough to operate on. If he pulls through the surgery, he’ll be in critical condition and if he doesn’t stay stable during the next twenty-fours, then his chances of surviving this will drop. Honestly, I’m not even sure how he managed to hold on for this long.”

“He wouldn’t defy orders that’s why,” a new voice said and both men looked up and saw Dr. Pitt heading here.

“Brad,” Dr. Hale stood up, “that was quick.”

“I was already on my way here for a consultation when I got the call,” Brad shook Hale’s hand before turning to Gibbs. “Agent Gibbs, it’s good to see you again, although the circumstances suck.”

“Brad,” Gibbs nodded.

“So, you wanna tell me what went down?” Brad asked as he sat next to Gibbs.

Gibbs explained what he knew, which was not much, and then fell silent.

“Well,” Brad’s face was grim, but there was still amusement there, “at least now we know why he’s still alive.”

“What do you man?” Hale asked.

“From what Gibbs just said,” Brad nodded to the little girl who was sleeping in the agent’s arms. “Tony was protecting her. His body may have been shutting down, but he fought it until he knew help had arrived. He held on to keep her safe and because he knew that Gibbs was coming.”

“Doctors?” a nurse called down to them, “We’re ready.”

Gibbs stood up when he saw Tony’s body on the bed between the nurses and doctors. “Where are you taking him?”

“OR three is the only one that’s free on this floor,” Dr. Hale said as he stood up as well, “and to be honest, we can’t wait to take the elevator up two more floors.”

Brad stood up and looked at Gibbs. “Don’t worry Gibbs. Tony’s a fighter. He didn’t give up then, and he won’t give up now.”

“Take care of him,” Gibbs nodded as he sat back down, readjusting the little girl in his arms.

“I will,” Brad nodded and then turned and left, with Dr. Hale following.

Letting out a deep sigh, Gibbs fell back against the wall. _‘Shannon, if you can hear me…keep him safe for me.’_

~…~

Abby’s hands were clenched tightly together as she sat in the passenger seat of Ducky’s car. When Gibbs had called her earlier for a trace on Tony’s phone, panic had settled in; panic because somehow she had known that something wasn’t right. She had felt it long before Gibbs had called her. 

She had known that Tony and the others were in the field and had been extremely concerned about them. A few times she had wanted to call them, but she had stopped herself, knowing that even though they were doing a routine canvass, they didn’t really need her calling all the time just to check up on them. But then Gibbs had called and the panic just came right in and settled down.

After they had hung up, she had paced her lab, hoping Gibbs would call her back, but he hadn’t. And then, almost a half an hour after he left, Ducky came up and got her, telling her that Tony had been seriously hurt and they needed to get to Bethesda.

The panic became fear. Just from Ducky’s tone, she knew it was bad and that scared her. They couldn’t lose Tony. _She_ couldn’t lose Tony. They may not have gotten along when they had first met—it was mostly on her part because she had felt like Gibbs was replacing her—but then, things had changed and they had gotten close pretty quickly. Tony was like an older brother to her and she was sure, she knew him better than anyone, save for Gibbs.

_‘He has to be ok…he just has to be,’_ she thought furiously as she fought to stop the tears from falling. She jumped when she felt the touch on her hand and looked down before looking over at Ducky.

“Have faith Abigail,” Ducky said gently without taking his eyes off the road. “Our Anthony is a fighter. Believe in him.”

“He’s right Abby,” Palmer said from the backseat. “Tony’s too stubborn to give up so easily.”

Abby let out a watery chuckle and squeezed Ducky’s hand, hoping and praying they were right. But she knew, deep down, that it would be a battle. Tony’s had too many brushes with death, more than anyone else should, and she hoped that his luck held out once more.

Minutes later, Ducky pulled up in front of the hospital, and Abby was out the car before it came to a complete stop. 

Ducky and Palmer hurried after her, and caught up to her just as she got inside. The three of them quickly made their way down the hallway, passing the receptionist without a word, and headed to where Gibbs had told Ducky he was.

Abby was the first to see him.

“Gibbs!” Abby called out as she ran over to him. She was about to throw herself in his arms, but came to a complete stop when she saw the little girl he was holding.

“Hey Abs,” Gibbs said softly, not wanting to wake the little girl.

“Jethro,” Ducky gave a nod as he and Palmer came up to them.

“Ducky,” Gibbs said on a sigh before he sat back down.

The three sat down around him.

“What happened Jethro?” Ducky asked.

“I don’t even know,” Gibbs let out a noise of frustration.

“This is Tony,” Abby said, “I mean, it’s not that bad, is it? He’ll recover and go back to doing what he does best.”

Gibbs could hear she was about to start rambling, which is what she did when she was nervous or excited or scared.

“The doctors don’t think so Abby,” Gibbs said, hating to be the one to tell her this.

“Jethro,” Ducky looked at his friend and saw the fear that he was trying so hard to hide, “What happened?”

“I told you Duck,” Gibbs near growled, “I don’t know!”

“Then what do you know?” Ducky asked instead.

With a sigh, Gibbs told them what he knew. When he was done, tears were running down Abby’s cheeks, Palmer was pale and Ducky had closed his eyes.

“What do the doctors think?” Palmer asked, and for the first time, he was able to speak to Gibbs without stuttering.

“Tony has to pull through the surgery and then he has to make it through the night,” Gibbs said, “Dr. Hale doesn’t think he’ll survive.”

“Well,” Ducky cleared his throat, “We know Anthony and he is a fighter. He won’t give up so easily.”

“That’s what Brad said,” Gibbs nodded.

“Brad?” Palmer looked confused.

“Dr. Pitt,” Abby whispered, “he’s the doctor that treated Tony when he had the plague.”

“Oh,” Palmer went quiet. At the time, he had been more concerned about Tony than knowing his doctor's name. 

“And who is this little girl?” Ducky asked, gesturing to the girl Gibbs had.

“I don’t know her name,” Gibbs admitted, “I found her with Tony. It seems as if he was protecting her. She didn’t want to leave him, so she came with me.”

They were all quiet for a few minutes before Abby shot up.

“Where’re Timmy and Ziva?” Abby asked, “Are they ok? They’re not hurt, right? Because Tony being hurt is enough and I don’t think I can handle--”

Gibbs reached out a hand to touch her arm, “Abs, breathe. And they’re ok. I had them stay behind to secure and clear the scene and to transport the suspect back to Headquarters.”

Abby took a deep breath to calm down. Seconds later, her brows furrowed, “How are they ok, but Tony’s fighting for his life? Weren’t they with him?”

The moment the question left her mouth, Gibbs tensed. That was what had been bothering him about the scene. McGee and Ziva had shown up after him, and neither one looked as if they had been in a fight. Looking back, he remembered when he was speeding to Tony, and the car that he had seen parked on the side of the road. It had been their car. 

“They weren’t with him,” the words slipped from Gibbs’ lips. 

“What?” Abby frowned at him.

“When I got there,” Gibbs explained, “Tony was on the floor with this little one tucked to his side. McGee and Ziva showed up after me.”

“But,” Palmer spoke up, “if they weren’t with Tony, then where were they?”

Gibbs didn’t have an answer for Palmer because that was a question he himself needed an answer for. The only people who could answer that question weren’t around; Tony was in surgery and   
McGee and Ziva were back at Headquarters. 

One way or another, he would find out what really happened out there. He just hoped that the answer he got, was not what he knew happened deep down. 

~…~

Back at the house, McGee and Ziva watched as the local coroner placed the woman’s body in the body bag before zipping it close and taking it to the van. 

McGee and Ziva watched with heavy, guilt-laden eyes; from what the coroner had told them, the woman had died just before Gibbs had gotten to Tony. And that meant, if they had been doing their jobs, if they hadn’t turned off the radio, they would’ve heard Tony’s cries for help and the woman would still be alive.

The two looked up when one of the officers walked over to them. The local LEOs had shown almost ten minutes after Gibbs had left with Tony and the little girl, and had commandeered the scene. 

“We’ll be taking him in,” the officer said, “and try to find out what went down here.”

McGee and Ziva exchanged looks.

“We can’t let you do that,” McGee shook his head.

“He’s not Naval or connected to the Naval,” the cop said.

“We know,” Ziva replied, “However, he did assault one of our agents and that makes him NCIS property.”

The cop opened his mouth to reply, but McGee cut him off.

“Look,” McGee said, “we’re taking him back with us. If you have a problem with it, have your superiors call my boss. I’m sure he’d love to hear how the local cops want to take the guy that attacked his agent away from us.”

The cop flinched because he knew who their boss was and going against Jethro Gibbs was not something he wanted to do. So, with obvious reluctance, he nodded and walked away.

McGee let out a sigh and ran a hand through his hair.

“We should go,” Ziva said and McGee nodded in agreement.

After securing the suspect, they took him back to their car and shoved him in the backseat. As they headed back to NCIS, McGee and Ziva were quiet. The man was still unconscious and they were both happy for that as they welcomed the silence. Each was lost in their own thoughts, their minds still on the scene they had walked into.

They hadn’t thought that something like that would’ve happened. It was just supposed to be a routine scout, nothing was supposed to happen. But something did; Tony got hurt. While they were playing their prank, their teammate had been fighting for his life. 

A groan from the backseat drew their attention and they both glanced back to see the man waking up.

“What the hell?” the man mumbled as he straightened up in the seat. He shifted and groaned when he realized his hands were bound. His eyes opened and he took in his surroundings, noticing   
that he was in the back of a car. 

“Where the hell am I?” he demanded, “And who are you people?”

“We’re NCIS,” McGee said, “and you’re our suspect. We’re taking you to our Headquarters.”

“On what grounds?” the man demanded.

“Assaulting a fellow agent, murder,” McGee stated, “do you want me to continue?”

“Murder?” the man paused, “So, the bitch died, didn’t she? Good riddance; never liked her anyways.” 

The man started to shake his head, but stopped when he felt the pain. Instead, he shifted even more and let out a chuckle, “so…that cop’s still alive? Too bad. You know, he put up a really good fight. Kept calling for his teammates, McGee and what was the other name? Tiva? Viva? Whatever,” the man shrugged with another laugh. “Taunted him as I kicked his ass; told him no one was coming. It was funny.” 

But neither one of the agents in front found it funny. Instead, the two exchanged horrified looks and the guilt that had been eating at them, increased immensely. Tony had tried to contact them, but he couldn’t, because they had turned off the radio.

Their teammate had been expecting them to be there for him, to have his six, but they hadn’t. They had let him down, and now, not only had someone died, but Tony was in the hospital fighting to stay alive. 

He groaned at the pain shooting up his body, “He got me good though. It was a good fight; never thought a cop could fight like that.”

Ziva’s hands shook as she turned the car into the NCIS parking lot. The man’s words echoed inside her brain. Tony had called out for her, and McGee, but they didn’t answer. They couldn’t. Why?   
Because they had wanted to play a prank; they had wanted peace and quiet from his ramblings and so had turned off the radio. 

How could they have been so stupid? How could they have messed up so badly? How could they, could _she_ , justify what they did to Tony? What they had done went against every protocol they knew. They had left Tony without backup. 

She knew that when the truth came out, everything would change. Gibbs would be furious. She might even lose her job and that thought scared her. She loved being an NCIS agent; she loved being here and being around these people. 

_‘I cannot lose them. They are my family,’_ Ziva thought despondently. She didn’t want to lose it all, but because of her actions, she just might.

Ziva wasn’t the only one thinking about what had happened. McGee was too. He still couldn’t get the image of a bloodied and broken Tony out of his mind. 

_‘How the hell did this happen? Nothing was supposed to happen!’_ McGee thought, _‘It was just a prank. I never meant for it to end up like this! Tony…Tony needed help…he called out to us for help and we didn’t hear him. We turned off the radio to get away from his talking and he ended up paying the price. Now, he’s at the hospital, fighting to stay alive.’_

“He’s gonna be ok,” McGee muttered softly, “he has to be. If he’s not ok, then I don’t think I will be; none of us will be.” 

And he knew that was the truth. They all had their place in their little family: Ducky was the grandfather, the one you went to talk or for someone to listen; Abby was like the youngest, the one most with the most child-like innocence, the one you wanted to protect; Palmer was like the quirky brother; he was computer genius, Gibbs was the mentor, the father-figure, Ziva was tough big sister who would protect you at all times, but Tony, Tony was the heart of the team. 

He kept them going; when things got too rough, he’d take their minds off of it; he’d help them deal with stuff in his own, unconventional way. He was serious when needed, but was also not above playing pranks and joking around to liven up a mood. 

When Tony got hurt, everyone rallied together to protect him, to help him and they would do anything and everything to make sure the person that hurt him got what they deserved; that they understood it wasn’t ok to mess with one of their own.

And at that thought, he paled. He and Ziva had left Tony; they were supposed to have each other’s six, but they didn’t. Tony had needed help, and had called for them, but he didn’t get it because they hadn’t been listening. They had cut off communications between him and them and had left him out in the cold.

_‘Oh God,’ _McGee moaned mentally, despair moving through him like hot lava, _‘It’s our fault. Because of what we did, Tony ended up in danger with no way out and a woman lost her life.’___

__The faces of Gibbs and Abby flew across his mind and his heart started pounding; when it came out, what they did, he would have to face and angry Gibbs and Abby and he knew, his place on the team, and possibly as an NCIS agent was in jeopardy._ _

__As he and Ziva left the car and took the suspect inside, the only thought on both of the agents’ minds, as selfish as it was, was the hope that somehow, the truth wouldn’t come out._ _

__~…~_ _

__After Ziva and McGee left the suspect in an interrogation, and informing the Director of what happened, the two made their way to the hospital._ _

__As they made their way to where they knew the others were, Ziva stopped walking and stopped her teammate as well._ _

__“Ziva?” McGee turned to her in confusion._ _

__“We need to talk McGee,” Ziva asked, her dark eyes searching his face._ _

__“Talk about what?” McGee frowned._ _

__“What we are going to tell Gibbs about what happened today,” Ziva explained. “He will ask and we need to know what to say.”_ _

__McGee kept the frown for a few more seconds before his eyes widened in shock, “You want us to _lie_ to Gibbs?”_ _

__“No!” Ziva hissed, “I do not like the idea of lying to him, but I also do not like the idea of losing my job. I think it would be more prudent if we averted any mention of what really happened, at least, until Tony is better.”_ _

__McGee stared at her for a few minutes, his brain processing what she was saying. If they told Gibbs what really happened, they would lose their jobs, but he still didn’t like the idea of lying to Gibbs either. He understood what she was getting at, and as much as he hated it, he had to agree._ _

__He let out a huge sigh, “You’re right. I don’t want to lie to Gibbs, but if we say anything, we could, and most definitely would, lose our jobs. The three of us are the only ones who know about the radio.” He paused and he hated himself for what he was about to say next, “Tony was hurt badly, and there’s a chance he might not remember. So, like you said, we won’t say anything until we  
know for sure where Tony stands.”_ _

__Immediately, the guilt clawed at him, but he resolutely pushed it away._ _

__Ziva nodded, her dark eyes were swimming with emotion, though most of it was unreadable to McGee. “I agree. I do not like this, but it is the best decision we have.”_ _

__“Why borrow trouble?” McGee quipped and when Ziva stared at him in confusion, he just shook his head. “Nothing. Come on; let’s find the others.”_ _

__Nothing more was said as they resumed their search._ _

__Five minutes later, they saw the others._ _

__Palmer was the first to spot them. “Hey guys,” he called out, alerting the others to their presence._ _

__“Any word on Tony?” McGee asked as he came a stop next to Ducky’s chair._ _

__“No,” Abby shook her head, her light green eyes shimmering with tears, “he’s still in surgery.”_ _

__“Report,” Gibbs demanded of the two of them, keeping his voice low enough not to disturb the little girl in his arms._ _

__“The guy, Franklin Morrison, is sitting in an interrogation room at NCIS,” McGee explained, “Unfortunately, his wife, Luciana Morrison neé Romano, didn’t make it. The coroner said she had been  
dead for at least an hour, which means she died just before you got there. The little girl,” he nodded to Gibbs’ arms, “is Vitalia and she’s four years old. Both mother and daughter have been in the hospital five times over the last six months for a variety of bruises. Morrison has been arrested a few times for domestic abuse, but the wife always dropped the charges.”_ _

__“So Tony walked in on the guy beating up his wife?” Palmer asked, brows furrowing behind his glasses._ _

__“Looks that way,” McGee nodded, holding back the flinch at Tony’s name._ _

__“But why didn’t Tony call for help?” Abby asked, the tears in her eyes running down her cheeks in tiny rivulets._ _

__McGee and Ziva exchanged panicked glances before McGee shrugged, “I don’t know.”_ _

__“Is there anything else?” Gibbs asked, his steel blue eyes boring into McGee._ _

__McGee had to swallow back the whimper of fear; the look in his boss’ eyes seemed to see right through to his soul and it felt like Gibbs knew that he was lying to him, that there was something else he was holding back. But he knew Ziva was right; he couldn’t say anything, so instead, he lied._ _

__“No boss, there’s nothing else.”_ _

__Gibbs let out a soft growl and sat back in the chair. He leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes._ _

__An hour later, the quietness of the waiting room was broken by the sound of Gibbs’ cell phone ringing. He pulled it from his pocket and checked the ID. When he saw it was the director, he glared  
and contemplated not answering, but he did, only to reply tersely, “Not now Leon,” before hanging up._ _

__Another hour passed with no word about Tony, and they took that as hope that everything was going well. Until they heard the words that sent fear through them all;_ _

___**"Code blue, OR three; Code Blue OR three."** _ _ _

__Gibbs’ eyes widened and he shot up out of his seat, “TONY!”_ _


	3. The Reason Is You

_**The choices we make affect not only us, but the people around us**_ —Unknown

_“Antonio!” a woman’s voice called out._

_Seconds later, childish giggles reached her ear, making her smile._

_“Antonio,” the woman called as she followed the giggles. She smiled even wider when she saw the noise led her to the rose garden, “Dove sei tesoro?” (Where are you sweetheart?)_

_More giggles._

_The woman let out a laugh and soon after, found where the giggles were coming from. It was a medium size rosebush that was covered in roses. “Il mio piccolo ‘Tonio e’ tornato?” (Is my little Tony back here?)_

_“No,” a child’s voice sounded and the woman laughed as she stepped behind the bush, spotting her three year old son._

_“Eccoti qui!” she reached down and lifted him into her arms, tickling him as she did so. (There you are!)_

_“No!” the little boy squealed with laughter, “Mamma…fermati…” (Mama…stop…)_

_“Non credo bambino,” the woman laughed as she continued to tickle her son, delighting in his laughter. (I don’t think so baby)_

_“Mama!” the boy giggled uncontrollably as he twisted and turned in his mother’s arms._

_The woman grinned and stopped her tickle attack and twisted her son so that she was looking into his eyes. She reached up and gently brushed his hair from his face before searching the green eyes identical to her own. “Ti voglio bene Tony.” (I love you Tony.)_

_Tony grinned and reached up tiny hands to frame his mother’s face, “Ti voglio bene anch’io mamma.” (I love you too mommy.)_

_**(Scene change)** _

_An eight year old boy sat on a couch, holding a placard tightly in his hands. His eyes took in the words without really seeing them_

Elisabeth Victoria Paddington-DiNozzo  
April 25th 1958 – August 16th 1986  
Beloved Wife and Mother

_Green eyes radiating pain and sadness as tears ran down his cheeks._

_“Anthony, stop that crying this instant!” a man’s voice boomed._

_The boy jumped a little and wiped his tears quickly, knowing much his father hated it; after all, DiNozzo men do not cry._

_“Sorry father,” Anthony replied, voice subdued as he straightened out his body. DiNozzo men didn’t slouch either. He wished his mother was still there. He wished she hadn’t left, that she had taken him with her._

_Why did his mommy have to die and leave him alone?_

_**(Scene change)** _

_Thirteen year old Anthony “Tony” DiNozzo stood in his father’s study, looking at the man in shock._

_“What?” Tony said softly._

_“Are you deaf?” his father glared at him, “I do not want you here, so I’m sending you away. You are going to Rhode Island Military Academy where I don’t have to see your worthless face.”_

_The words stung, but Tony had learn a long time ago not show any emotion to his father. Instead, he schooled his features into a mask of stone._

_“You leave tomorrow,” his father continued. “Now, get out of my study.”_

_Without saying anything, Tony turned and left his father’s study. It wasn’t until he was in the safety of his room did he let the tears fall. But they weren’t tears of sadness, no, they were tears of joy for he was not going to be around his father anymore._

_**“Anthony…Anthony…”** _

_**He looked up and gasped when he saw her. “Mama?”** _

_**“Hello my sweet boy,” Elisabeth smiled at him as she drew him into her arms.** _

_**“I miss you mom,” Tony whispered as he buried his head in his mother’s chest. He always felt safe and loved when he did this.** _

_**“I miss you too baby,” Elisabeth replied as she drew back from the hug. She framed his face in her hands. “Come…we don’t have much time.”** _

_**Tony turned confused eyes to her, “What do you mean?”** _

_**“You shouldn’t be here Tony,” Elisabeth said, “Do you remember what happened?”** _

_**Tony’s brows furrowed as he thought about it. “I remember going on a scouting mission with Ziva and Tim,” he bit his lip, “but that’s it.”** _

_**“Honey, you need to go back,” Elisabeth said gently, cupping his face in her hand.** _

_**“I don’t want to,” Tony shook his head, “Mom, there’s so much I have to tell you.”** _

_**“I know baby,” Elisabeth smiled sadly, “and you can always tell me, but you cannot stay here.”** _

_**“Why not?” Tony demanded.** _

_**“Because they still need you…he still needs you,” Elisabeth replied.** _

_**“Who mom?” Tony asked, “who are you talking about?”** _

_**“Go back Tony,” Elisabeth pulled away and slowly, she started drifting away from him, “It’s not your time yet. Go home…go to him.”** _

_**As his mother got farther away, Tony ran after her. “Mom!”** _

“BP’s dropping,” a nurse said as she read the numbers on the monitor in front of her, “We’re losing him!”

“Come on Tony,” Dr. Pitt said softly, “don’t give up now.”

_Beep…beep…beep…beep…beeeeeeep_

“Damnit Tony!” Dr. Pitt swore.

_**Tony was breathing heavily as he chased his mom. He didn’t want her to leave. He watched as she disappeared into a bright white door and he was almost to it when a woman stepped in front of him.** _

_**He came to a stop and stared at her. His eyes took in her bright red hair and the easy smile on her face. “Who are you?”** _

_**The woman grinned, “You don’t know me. Or rather, you’ve never met me, but you do know of me.”** _

_**Tony shook his head.** _

_**“Mommy.” A little girl, around nine, ran over and grabbed the woman’s hand.** _

_**Tony’s gaze dropped from mother to daughter; both looked familiar to him, but he couldn’t say where he’d seen them before. The little girl smiled up at him, and he staggered back when he recognized her smile. His eyes moved to her eyes and he saw familiar steel blue eyes looking at him. “Kelly?”** _

_**Kelly giggled in response.** _

_**Tony looked up at the woman, “Shannon.”** _

_**“Right you are,” Shannon smiled. She lost it as she stepped closer to him. “I know you want to go with her, but you can’t. You’re still needed. Jethro needs you Tony.”** _

_**Images of his boss flashed through his mind. “Why?”** _

_**“Because you have done something I thought would never happen,” Shannon replied, “you opened his heart back up. He loves you Tony; for the first time since losing me, Jethro is able to fully and truly love someone again.”** _

_**“Why me?” Tony whispered.** _

_**“Because you taught him that it was ok to smile, really smile, again,” Shannon grinned, “you showed him that it was ok to laugh, to have fun, that it was ok to miss us, that he could move on without forgetting me and because you accept his love for me instead of being intimidated by it.”** _

_**Tony’s eyes dropped in embarrassment, unable to believe he had done all that for his boss, the man he secretly loved.** _

_**Shannon laughed and reached out to tip his chin up so his eyes would meet her, “Don’t be shy. I’m happy that it’s you because I know you love him just as much and that you’ll take care of him. You won’t put up with his stubbornness or let him push you away. You and I are alike in that way.” She kissed his cheek, “take care of him, and yourself.”** _

_**“How?” Tony asked.** _

_**“You go back,” Shannon said as she gently pushed him away.** _

_**Tony turned towards where he had come from. He could hear someone calling his name. He turned back towards Shannon.** _

_**“It’s time to go,” Shannon smiled.** _

_**Tony nodded and knelt in front of Kelly. “I’ll take care of your daddy for you. I promise.”** _

_**“I know,” Kelly grinned, looking remarkably like her father. She threw her arms around Tony’s neck for a tight hug before pulling back.** _

_**He stood up and looked at Shannon. “I-,” he stopped, not knowing what to say.** _

_**“It’s ok,” Shannon hugged him briefly. “Now go, he needs you.”** _

_**Tony smiled at her, “thank you.”** _

_**“Tell him we love him,” Shannon said.** _

_**“I will,” Tony said, “Bye.” And with that, he turned and ran towards the voice.** _

_Beeeeeeep...beep…beep…beep…beep_

“We got him back,” the female nurse let out a sigh of relief.

“Thank God,” Dr. Hale breathed out.

“Good job Tony,” Dr. Pitt looked down at the man unconscious on the table. “Alright, let’s finish. Carefully. We do not want to lose him again.”

The team of doctors and nurses worked on Tony diligently. An hour later, they were done.

“Ok,” Dr. Pitt nodded and let out a weary sigh, “let’s get him cleaned up and up to a room. Call ICU and let them know you’re on the way. I’m going to go and talk to his teammates.”

~…~

Gibbs ignored the others as he took off towards where he knew Tony was. He went through the double doors and was about to go into the operating room when he was stopped by a nurse.

“I’m sorry sir but you can’t go in there,” the nurse.

Gibbs glared at her with such iciness that the woman took a step back. “Try and stop me.”

The others had jumped at Gibbs’ shout and without even thinking, they took off after him. They got to him just in time to hear the exchange and they saw the fear in the nurse’s eyes.

Ducky decided to intervene before the woman started crying. “Jethro, she’s right. If you enter that room, you’ll be introducing harmful pathogens and our dear Anthony will be in even more trouble.”

Gibbs let out a growl as he turned from the nurse to look through the doors where he saw the doctors trying to keep Tony alive. He was barely aware of the others behind him, or Abby crying. His heart was pounding as fear danced through him. He couldn’t lose Tony, not now. 

Losing his girls had nearly destroyed him, but losing Tony would break him. The Italian had come to mean so much to him, more than he thought possible. From the moment they first met, he had felt a connection with the younger man. He had tried to play it off, but that hadn’t worked. Instead, the connection grew stronger and he had found himself having feelings for his Senior Field Agent.

The feelings had shocked him because the last time he had felt that way had been with Shannon and he had never expected to feel that way about anyone again, least of all a man. So instead, he had buried the feelings, had pushed them away and had distracted himself with countless women to do so, but it hadn’t worked. 

Then Tony had caught the plague. And things had changed; he always knew that their job didn’t come with a guarantee, but suddenly, he had had to come face to face with that fact. Watching Tony lying in that hospital bed, fighting to breathe had made his heart ached with pain and fear and anger. That moment had forced him to admit just how deeply he felt about his agent. And instead of opening up to Tony, he had forced them back down and this time, he had hid behind rule twelve.

And now, Tony was once again fighting for his life and he could do nothing but watch; watch as the man he loved slowly faded away, as did his chances of finally admitting out loud what Tony really meant to him.

 _‘NO!’_ he gave a mental snarl, unable to process the idea of losing Tony, _‘I can’t lose him; not now…not ever! Shannon…if you can hear me, please, send him back. I…I need him here with me.’_

Gibbs ran a hand over his face, as he watched the doctors. For a split second, he froze. He could’ve sworn he just heard Shannon’s voice. Shaking his head, he dismissed the thought. 

A touch on his arm had him turning and he saw Abby staring at him.

“He’s ok,” Abby whispered, her heart in her throat when she saw the turbulent emotions in his eyes. She knew he was scared for Tony, just like she was, but she suspected that his fear went deeper. “They got him back. They had to.”

Gibbs believed her because he had to; he wanted to. Shifting Vitalia in his arms, he freed one and wrapped it around Abby.

The others shifted closer to them, bonding and hoping their teammate and friend was ok.

Almost an hour later, the double doors opened and Dr. Pitt walked.

“Bradley,” Ducky called out when he saw the man, “How’s Anthony?”

Brad looked at all of them and sighed, “We’d better sit down.”

They all froze at his words.

“Please?” Brad gestured to the chairs on the opposite side of the wall. 

When they had all taken seats, he looked at them, “It was bad. Dr. Hale already explained Tony’s injuries to you, so I’m not going to go over them. Tony’s heart stopped, which I’m sure you know because of the Code Blue that came over the speakers.”

“Is he alive?” Abby interrupted tearfully, “He’s ok, right? You got him? He didn’t die?”

“ _That_ is the only good news,” Brad sighed, “Thankfully we _were_ able to get him back.”

Sighs of relief echoed from everyone and Brad had to smile. Tony had a good support system and was loved. He would need it. He hated to rain on their parade, but there were things they still needed to know.

“However,” Brad continued, “He’s not out of the woods just yet. Right now, he’s getting cleaned up and heading up to ICU. He’s stable, but that could change. The next twenty-four hours are critical. If Tony makes it through the night, then his chances of recovering from this will improve. Because of his multitude of injuries and the threat they were to him, we had to place him in a medically-induced coma. We’ll keep him in just for the first few days and then, take him out.”

He stood up, “I know it may not seem like it, but Tony pulled through the surgery, and he’s going to pull through this. When he had the plague, none of the doctors—myself included—thought he would survive, but he did. Don’t count him out just yet.”

“We won’t,” Ducky said, “Thank you Dr. Pitt, for taking care of him.”

“You’re welcome,” Brad nodded, “when he’s settled, I’ll come back and let you know, and then take you there.” He turned to Gibbs, “Since I know you’re not going to leave his side, I’ll make arrangements for you to stay with him and make it possible for at least one other person to be able to spend the night.”

“Thanks doc,” Gibbs nodded. He shifted Vitalia, looking down at her instinctually and paused when he saw that her eyes were open. “Well hey there.”

Vitalia said nothing; she only stared up at Gibbs, completely ignoring everyone else.

“We’re going to see Tony,” Gibbs told her, “he’s the one who saved you.”

Vitalia relaxed and placed her head back on the man’s shoulder and let him continue holding her. She felt safe around him, just like she had felt safe with the man who tried to help her.

~…~

Just over an hour later, they were headed up to the ICU. When they got to where Tony was, they saw that the nurses and doctors were finishing up settling him in. They stayed in the waiting room, giving the medical team the space they needed. When Dr. Hale, the last one in the room, came out, they all stepped forward.

“He’s stable, but like I’m sure Dr. Pitt has already you told you,” Dr. Hale explained, “he’s not out of the woods as yet.” He gestured for them to enter the room.

As they stepped inside, they all gasped, Gibbs included, at the sight of Tony filled with wires and bandages.

“I wish I could say it looks a lot worse than it is,” Dr. Hale said, “but I can’t.”

Ducky, having more medical knowledge than the others, walked over to Tony’s bedside to read his charts. He picked it up, but didn’t open it; instead, he looked at Tony, “Oh dear Anthony. It seems as if you are always the one to be held in fate’s cruel grasp.”

“Why-why is he intubated?” McGee asked. He had to swallow over the heavy lump in his throat to get his words out, “Wouldn’t that be a bad thing because of his lungs?”

“Normally we wouldn’t have,” Brad explained, “but because Tony suffered a pierced lung, he cannot breathe on his own.”

“Oh God,” McGee collapsed into the chair behind him and buried his face in his hands. The guilt that he had pushed away earlier came back full force. They had done this; all because of a stupid  
prank Tony was like this.

Ziva’s eyes darted around the room, unable to stay on Tony’s still form. It was unnatural seeing Tony lying there unmoving. And she knew, if she stared at him for too long, her guilt would overwhelm her. She was good at hiding her emotions, but this, keeping this secret from Gibbs and the others, and her guilt at what her actions had resulted in was too much. She was deeply afraid that one of the others would see what she was desperately trying to hide.

Abby let out a sob and on shaky legs, she walked over to Tony’s side. She wanted so badly to touch him but she couldn’t. There were wires everywhere; his left shoulder was in a sling while his right one was bandaged; there was another bandage around his head and one around his stomach; his right wrist was in a cast and his eyes looked swollen. All over his upper body were bruises. The only part of Tony that seemed untouched had been his legs.

Being as careful, and gentle, as she could, Abby rested her hand on Tony’s right arm. “Tony; you listen to me. You can’t die, ok? I need you here. You’re my big brother and I need you to get better.” Another sob, “You have to be ok. So fight to stay with us.”

Everyone had tears in their eyes as they listened to Abby.

Ziva stared at the Goth before she left the room abruptly. They watched her leave with understanding.

“Is she ok?” Dr. Hale asked, watching Ziva’s departure with concern.

“She’ll be alright,” Ducky nodded as he wiped his tears. “This is hard for us; to see young Anthony in such a state.”

Dr. Hale’s eyes were filled with compassion. “Understandable.” He sighed, “Well, visiting hours are over at six.”

“I’ve made arrangements for Agent Gibbs to stay as I know he’ll not want to leave Tony by himself,” Dr. Pitt said, coming into the room. They started a bit as they hadn’t noticed when he left. “And one other person can stay as well, that way each of the others has time with Agent DiNozzo.”

“Thank you,” Ducky nodded and watched as the two doctors left the room. He turned to his friend, a little surprised at the fact that he hadn’t heard Gibbs say anything at all since they entered the room. He watched with sad eyes as Gibbs sat down in the chair on Tony’s left side, being careful of the little girl still clinging to him and watched as blue eyes traced Tony’s form.

He could read the emotions swirling in his friend’s eyes and what he saw confirmed what he had long suspected. Smiling genuinely for the first time since hearing about Tony, he turned away, giving his friend his privacy.

His gaze landed on the final member of their family and he frowned slightly; there was something off about his reaction. It wasn’t that he thought it wasn’t genuine, because he knew it was, but there was something more surrounding it. 

So, he walked over to the young man, “Are you alright Timothy?” he asked.

McGee looked up at Ducky and let out a heavy sigh. “I’m fine. Is Ziva ok?”

Ducky looked up and saw Ziva leaning against the wall opposite the room, “I do believe so. I suppose though that it is very hard to see our Anthony in such a state.”

Guilt flashed across McGee’s face and Ducky frowned when he saw it. _‘What on Earth? Why is Timothy feeling guilty? He had nothing to do with Anthony getting attacked.’_

A thought unfurled in Ducky’s mind, but he dismissed it immediately. There was no way that had happened. No way.

Shaking his head, he stepped out of the room and walked over to Ziva, “He is going to be fine, you know?”

Ziva looked up at him and for the first time Ducky was able to read the girl fully. He knew she had learned at an early age to hide all emotions, but right now, she couldn’t; he could read the pain and fear in her eyes.

“I hope so,” Ziva said as she clutched her Star of David pendant in her hand. “I am…unused to seeing Tony like that.”

Ducky sighed and leaned against the wall next to her, “Understandable. Anthony is so full of life and is always on the move, that it is a bit disconcerting to see him so still. But not to worry Ziva dear; he will pull through this. Now come, let’s remind our friend that he has too much to live for and that he has people counting on him to recover.”

Ziva looked up at Ducky and nodded as she leaned off the wall and the two headed to Tony’s room. She stopped just before entering; her dark eyes took in the sight of her boss staring at their fallen teammate with an intensity that surprised, the way Abby repeatedly reached out a hand to touch Tony only to pull back at the last second and McGee’s slumped posture.

“We never should’ve done it,” the words slipped from her mouth without warning as she thought once again on her part in Tony’s attack.

Ducky frowned at her words. _‘What an odd thing to say. What does she mean by that?’_

He pushed the words out of his mind however and stepped back inside Tony’s room. Just as the door closed, Vitalia spoke up.

“Lui sta bene?” she asked and they all turned to look at her. _(He ok?)_

While Ducky, McGee and Ziva were confused as they did not understand Italian, Abby and Gibbs weren’t, and it was Abby who answered.

“E’ stato ferito molto gravamente ,” Abby replied softly, “E in questo momento sta dormendo così puo’ guarire.” _(He’s hurt really bad. And right now he’s sleeping so that he can get better.)  
_

“Dove e’ la mamma?” Vitalia asked as she looked around the room. _(Where’s mommy?)_

Abby’s eyes slipped shut in sadness before she opened them up. She had no idea how to answer the girl’s question, and so, she turned pleading eyes to Gibbs.

Gibbs gave Abby and quick nod and then shifted the girl so that he could look her in her eyes, “La tua mamma ha dovuto andare via. Non voleta, ma ha dovuto.” _(Your mommy had to leave. She didn’t want to, but she had to.)_

Vitalia bowed her head and her hands clutched Gibbs’ shirt tighter. “La mamma e’ congli angeli adesso?” _(Is mommy with angels now?)_

Abby let out a gasp and Gibbs’ eyes widened.

“What is it?” McGee asked, looking at Abby in concern.

“She asked,” Abby paused to clear her throat, “she asked if her mother was with the angels.”

All eyes turned to Gibbs.

“What’s Gibbs saying now?” Palmer asked, watching Gibbs speak gently to the little girl.

“He’s asking her why she said that,” Abby told them. When Vitalia replied, she gasped again and then, started translating before they could ask, “She said that her mother told her that one day angels would come and she would go with them and that she wasn’t supposed to cry because the angels would leave someone to take care of her. She said that Tony stopped her dad from hurting her mother and that he protected her and she knows she’s safe because it was just like her mommy had told her; the angels left Tony for her.”

Everyone remained quiet, in awe of the little girl and her words; they were shocked by insight that her mother had to prepare for what she knew was her inevitable death at the hands of her husband.

Palmer turned to Abby, “I didn’t know you spoke Italian.”

“Tony taught me,” Abby admitted with a smile, “He said my name could pass as Italian, and people would assume, so he’d teach me and I can fool people into thinking I am.” She looked back at Tony. “I’ve also been teaching him sign language.”

“He can sign?” McGee asked looking at Tony in shock.

“Yeah,” Abby nodded, “He picked it up really quickly and now, he’s practically fluent in it.”

They went silent after that, each other them just staring at the man that meant so much to them.

Almost two hours passed since they had entered Tony’s room. Sometime around the first hour, they had all fallen asleep. 

Gibbs was the first to stir. He looked over at Abby and saw that she was still asleep. “Abbs…Abby.”

Abby let out a soft groan as she woke. She twisted to pop her back before looking over at Gibbs. “Yeah?”

“Can you stay with her?” Gibbs asked as he gestured to the sleeping Vitalia in his hands.

“Sure,” Abby nodded, “but why?”

“The Director called,” Gibbs told her as he stood up. He walked over and placed Vitalia in her arms, being careful not wake her.

“What about Timmy and Ziva?” Abby asked as she shifted Vitalia to be more comfortable.

Gibbs glanced at his agents as well as Ducky and Palmer, seeing that they were still sleeping. “They’re coming with; they still need to write up their reports on today.”

“Ok,” Abby nodded.

Gibbs bent down and kissed her head. “Help him fight Abbs.”

“I will,” Abby said, her green eyes shining with determination. 

He walked over to his two agents and woke them up. “Let’s go.”

Ducky and Palmer woke as well.

“What’s going on?” Palmer yawned out.

“The Director called,” Gibbs replied, “We’re heading back to NCIS. Abby is gonna stay with Tony.” He turned to Ducky, “Duck—

“We will stay as well,” Ducky interrupted with a smile. We would’ve been doing nothing but inventory, nothing that can’t be done tomorrow. 

“Thanks Duck,” Gibbs nodded. He turned to Ziva and McGee, “Let’s go.”

The three agents left the room leaving, Ducky, Palmer, Abby and a sleeping Vitalia.

When the door closed, Abby turned back to her friend, “It’s just us now. We’re here Tony, and we’re not going anywhere. So come back to us.”

“She’s right my dear boy,” Ducky added on as he took Gibbs’ seat. “You have a fight ahead of you, but it is one I have high hopes you will win. Do not prove me wrong.”

~…~

Vance stood against the railing, looking down at the bullpen; his gaze moving over the agents on the floor before it rested on the area that belonged to Gibbs and his team. 

When he had heard about DiNozzo being attacked, he could honestly say that while a part of him had been shocked, the other part had only mumbled ‘of course he was’. From what he knew, the Italian had a penchant of getting into the worst of situations; case in point, the plague. 

He had never met anyone so unlucky before…or lucky if you look at it another way; because as much as DiNozzo got into situations, somehow, he was able to get out of them. Which is why he was agitated; ever since the two agents had left a few hours ago, he had heard nothing from either Gibbs or his team. 

He would be damned if he would ever admit this, but he was worried about DiNozzo. It wasn’t a secret that when they first met he didn’t like the other man; he had thought him too lazy, too invested in flirting with every woman he met or playing pranks and he honestly couldn’t believe just why it was Gibbs had kept the man around when he was known for not having tolerance for anyone who couldn’t do their jobs.

It’s one of the main reasons why he had assigned DiNozzo as an Agent Afloat when he had first started here. He had thought that the agent was a carbon copy of his father and hadn’t think NCIS needed a playboy like him. At the time, as far as he was concerned, Agents McGee and David were better choices for NCIS.

But things changed. It had been his wife and kids actually who had made him realize that there was more to Anthony DiNozzo that he had first thought; so, he decided to observe and what he had seen had finally shown him just why Gibbs kept the man around. 

DiNozzo might act like a frat boy, but when it came down to it, he was someone you could count on in a tough situation; his love of movies and talking about them may be annoying, but more often than not, it was that love of movies and applying them to life that had helped the team solve their crimes. And, he had an ability to think outside the box and see things that others wouldn’t normally see.

But the biggest find was the fact that DiNozzo was the only one that seemed able to go toe to toe with Gibbs, and seemed to be the only one that could handle the man when he was in one of his dark moods. The boy seemed to have a knack of deflecting Gibbs’ wrath from the other team members and focus it on himself.

It had taken a while, but he Vance had come to realize that despite his first impression of the man, DiNozzo was very valuable to Gibbs. And if all that hadn’t been enough to convince him of that, just watching the agents on the floor did; by now, news of what had happened had already circulated NCIS, so everyone knew and that meant that everyone wanted a go at the man, but he couldn’t allow that to happen. He had to declare that the interrogation room holding Morrison was off-limits and no one was to go there.

Everyone on the floor was quiet, more quiet than normal and they would all periodically cast looks towards Gibbs’ section.

The ding of the elevator drew Vance from his thoughts and he looked up to see Gibbs, McGee and Ziva step off the elevator. The look on the lead agent’s face had him wincing and thankful that he wasn’t the one on the receiving end. And by the looks on all the other agents’ faces, they felt the same.

Knowing he couldn’t let Gibbs go into the same room as Morrison with how he was feeling now, he decided to intervene, “Agent Gibbs, my office…now!”

With that he turned and walked away, hoping to prepare himself mentally for dealing with a pissed off Gibbs.

~…~

Gibbs growled as he watched Vance head back to his office. He turned back to his agents, “Write up your reports. I want to know everything that happened; no detail is to be left out. That bastard is not going to get away with this.”

He turned back and started for the stairs leading to MTAC and the director’s office, and therefore, missed the panicked looks that McGee and Ziva exchanged.

When he got to the top of the stairs, he headed directly for Vance’s office, ignoring the secretary who was watching and went straight inside. 

“Close the door,” Vance sat as he leaned back in his chair, unconsciously putting more space between him and Gibbs. “Now, do you want to tell me exactly what happened that caused Agent DiNozzo to end up in the hospital?”

Gibbs glared at his boss for a few minutes before explaining everything that had happened through gritted teeth. 

When he was done, Vance stared at impassively, though inside, he was reeling with shock. _‘I didn’t realize it was so serious. It’s a wonder DiNozzo is still alive.’_

“Are we done?” Gibbs growled; he was itching to get his hands on Morrison. No one messed with his team; no one.

“No,” Vance said, “you’ve been at the hospital for four hours and not once in that time, did you think to call and let me know what was going on with my agent?”

“Your agent?” Gibbs snarled at the man as he took a step closer, “since when is DiNozzo your agent?”

“Since I became the director of this agency,” Vance fired back; anger was good. It was better than showing the fear that took hold the moment Gibbs had stepped closer. “I was to be kept in the loop at all times. Besides, isn’t it one of your infamous rules ‘never be unreachable’?”

Hands clenched into tights fists, Gibbs took a step back and turned around as he suppressed the urge to punch his boss. 

“I am so sorry director,” Gibbs mocked, his back still turned, “but making sure that my agent was alive was a bigger priority that soothing your ruffled feathers.”

Gibbs said nothing more as headed towards the door.

Vance stood up, “Gibbs, you are not speaking to Morrison until you are under control!”

Gibbs didn’t even stop, “Try and stop me.” And he opened the door and stepped out, letting it slam shut behind him.

“Shit!” Vance cursed as he quickly moved from around his desk and after the agent.

~…~

Gibbs stormed down the stairs, oblivious to the looks he was receiving from the other agents. He turned and headed directly to where he knew Morrison was, and the people in the way, moved immediately. Whispers started up as they all knew where he was going.

When Gibbs entered the interrogation room, he saw Morrison sitting there with a smirk on his face and the control that he had tried to kept, shattered.

In seconds, he was across the room, hauling the man out of his seat and onto the table. “You think this is funny?!” Gibbs yelled. He pulled him off the table and threw him on the floor. 

Morrison groaned as he felt the pain shot up his spine. Before he could even move though, he was grabbed again.

“You think it’s funny that a woman is dead, a little girl is traumatized and my agent is fighting for his life?! HUH?!” Gibbs roared as he pulled him off the floor and slammed him back into the wall. 

“GIBBS!” Vance rushed into the room and grabbed hold of Gibbs and tried to pull him off of Morrison, but to no avail. “DAMNIT JETHRO LET HIM GO!”

Gibbs ignored Vance’s words. Instead, he cocked his arm back and then sent his fist flying straight into Morrison’s nose, breaking it. The noise it made left him satisfied.

“HELP ME GET HIM OFF!” Vance turned to look at the two agents he had brought with him. He watched in disbelief as they stood there looking at the scene, almost as if they were thinking about just letting Gibbs keep attacking the man. He was about to yell at them again when they finally moved and came over to help him with Gibbs.

It took about five minutes for them to pry Gibbs’ hands from Morrison and then another five to pull him away.

“I’m fine,” Gibbs said gruffly as he shoved them away. Glaring one more time at the man, he turned to leave the room.

“If you care so much about that agent,” Morrison spoke up, stopping Gibbs in his tracks, “then where were you when he was calling for help?” He started laughing, “He must’ve called for back-up five or six times and no one came.” 

Gibbs slowly turned around; his steel blue eyes held cold fury while his face looked like it was carved from granite.

Morrison gulped and backed away.

Gibbs walked forward slowly, like a predator that scented its prey and was closing in on the kill. He kept going until Morrison was pressed against the wall. He got close enough without touching and then, he stared and stared and stared until Morrison started shaking and he saw nothing but fear, and then, he smirked. 

Keeping the smirk, Gibbs stepped away and then turned and headed for the door. When he got to the doorway, he stopped to say something and when he spoke, his voice silky and dangerous, “I wonder if you’ll still be laughing in prison when it gets out that you abused your daughter and killed your wife?”

With that, he walked away. As he got further away from the interrogation room, the smirk disappeared and his face, and eyes, relaxed into a frown.

Morrison’s words echoed in his mind.

_…where were you when he was calling for help… called for back-up five or six times and no one came…_

_‘Why didn’t Ziva or McGee respond? What were they doing so they didn’t hear Tony? Did the radio break?’_

Shaking his head, Gibbs headed directly to his desk. As he sat down, he pulled out his cell and dialled Abby’s number. “Abby, I need you to come back here. (pause). There’s something I need you to do for me. Call me when you get here.”

He hung up and stared at his cell for a few minutes before looking up at Ziva and McGee, neither one aware he was watching them.

_‘I hope I’m wrong. I really do.’_

~…~

Abby sighed as she hung up after talking to Gibbs. She didn’t want to leave, but she knew it had to be important. 

“What did Gibbs want?” Palmer asked.

“He didn’t say,” Abby told him, “He just said there was something he needed me to do.” She looked down at Vitalia. “Hey baby girl, I have to go for a little while.”

Vitalia’s eyes grew wide with shock and she clutched at Abby. “No, I don’t want you to go.”

All three were shocked to hear her speak English; they had thought she only spoke Italian.

“I know,” Abby soothed, quickly getting over her shock, “I don’t want to go either, but bossman needs me.”

“I think it would be wise if you took her with you Abigail,” Ducky said, “I don’t think she’ll stay calm if you leave her here.”

Abby looked at Ducky and then back at Vitalia, “Do you want to come with me? We’re going to go see where Tony works.”

Vitalia bit her lip and ducked her head. She didn’t want to leave. She didn’t want the angels to leave with Tony.

Abby gently guided her chin upwards so that she could see her eyes, “Hey, it’s ok. I promise you though, we will come right back here, ok? We won’t stay too long.”

After a few minutes, Vitalia nodded.

“Ok,” Abby smiled and stood up, shifting the girl to her hips. She turned to Tony, “Gibbs called, and you know when bossman calls, you gotta go. But don’t worry, I’ll be back, so keep holding on.”

She turned to Ducky and Palmer, “make sure he doesn’t give up.”

Ducky smiled, “We won’t.”

After one last smile, Abby left the room.

~…~

When Abby got down to her lab, she called Gibbs to let him know. “Gibbs, I’m here.”

_“I need you to go to your lab and check the radio that McGee and the others were using,” Gibbs said, “I need to know if the radio malfunctioned.”_

“Got it,” Abby nodded, forgetting he couldn’t see her, and hung up. She looked at Vitalia and walked over to a chair sitting against the wall. “I’m going to put you here, ok? I can still see you, so you don’t have to be afraid.”

She went into her office and grabbed Bert. Walking back out, she gave him to Vitalia. “This is my friend Bert. You can hold him until I’m done.”

“Ok,” Vitalia replied softly as she took the hippo. 

Abby smiled briefly before going to do what Gibbs had asked of her. She was still smiling as she went through the recordings, but soon, a frowned replaced her smile and she bit her lip.

“What the hell?” she mumbled under her breath. 

Her fingers clicking across the keyboard was the only sound in the lab. A few minutes later, her frown deepened.

“That can’t be right,” she muttered. She turned to Vitalia, “V.”

Vitalia looked up from the hippo to stare at the woman who had been taking care of her, “Yes?”

Abby walked over and knelt in front of the little girl, “I’m going to run downstairs to the car for something. I’ll be back real quick, ok? Just five minutes.”

Vitalia stared at her for a few minutes before she nodded slowly, “Ok…I stay here.”

Abby smiled and leaned forward to kiss her forehead, “good girl. Bert will keep you company. Don’t touch anything because I don’t want you to get hurt.” She stood up, “I’ll be back.”

With that, she hurried from the room, and headed down to their garage. When she got there, she called out to the few workers around as she headed directly to the car. She quickly got in and checked the radio, frowning as she did so.

“Ok,” Abby murmured as she looked over the radio, “It’s not broken, but that doesn’t make any sense.”

Hoping to make sense out of what her eyes were seeing, Abby grabbed the radio and headed back to her lab.

When she got back, she heard a loud fart and giggling and saw Vitalia still sitting in the chair, but she was squeezing Bert. 

“I’m back,” she announced as she walked into the room.

Vitalia’s head flew up from the hippo and settled on Abby and her body relaxed back into her chair. 

“We’re almost done,” Abby said as she walked over to her computer, “and then, we can go back and see Tony again.”

Hearing the man’s name, Vitalia smiled. She wanted to be near him; he kept her safe and protected her from her daddy. The angels gave him to her so he was hers to keep. She was to stay with him.

Abby turned her focus on her computers and reran the recording from earlier. As she listened, her gaze moved back to the radio and then back to the computer.

_‘Ok…so the radio obviously isn’t broken, and it didn’t malfunction either. So then, why are there a couple of hours missing?’_

Abby’s eyes widened in disbelief and horror as realization struck her. She tried to dismiss the idea.

“No,” Abby shook her head, “that can’t be true. I mean, it’s not possible! NO! No way did they do that!”

But no matter how much she tried, she couldn’t deny the obvious truth. Her eyes filled with tears and a hand came up to cover her mouth, “Oh God.”

Her mind drifted as she recalled being at the hospital; suddenly, everything made sense. The looks on both of their faces, the way Ziva had left the room, Gibbs’ words; it was true.

“How could they do this?” Abby question as her tears spilled over. Tony had been out there, expecting his teammates to have his six, but they hadn’t. Instead, they left him alone and Tony had ended up in trouble with no one to help. He had ended up needing their help, but he didn’t get it and now, he was in the hospital fighting to stay alive.

She had to tell Gibbs.

She picked up her phone and dialled his number, her fingers shaking the entire time.

_“Gibbs.”_

“Gibbs,” Abby cried softly.

_“What is it Abby? Are you ok? Is Vitalia ok?” Gibbs straightened up in his seat at the distress in her voice._

“It’s not-it’s not us,” Abby assured him as she tried to get her tears under control. “I did what you asked me to.”

_“You found something?” Gibbs asked._

“I did,” Abby nodded, “Gibbs, I can’t believe this.”

_“What did you find Abby?” Gibbs asked._

Her tears clogged her throat and she had to swallow a few times before she could talk. The betrayal of what they did was too much, “It’s their fault. What happened to Tony, it’s their fault.”

_“What are you talking about Abbs?” Gibbs’ voice hardened slowly._

Abby spoke again, the pain in her voice coming through clearly, “The radio didn’t break, and it didn’t malfunction either. The only explanation is, is—

_“Is what Abbs?” Gibbs demanded gently._

Abby sniffled, “Gibbs, the only explanation is that the radio was turned off.” A sob escaped, “They turned it off Gibbs.”

_Gibbs froze for a split second before rage took him over, “They did WHAT?”_


	4. Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** NCIS and all its affiliates belong to its creators Donald P. Bellisario and Don McGill, and CBS Television. No trademark or copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made from this. In other words, I DO NOT own.
> 
> “Speaking”  
>  _‘Thinking’  
>  “Speaking over the phone”_

_For every good reason there is to lie, there is a better reason to tell the truth—_ Bo Bennett

Gibbs’ shout echoed in the air, freezing everyone on the floor and every agent turned to stare at him, but he ignored them. He couldn’t believe what Abby had just told him.

Immediately, McGee and Ziva were out of their seats and standing in front of Gibbs’ desk, concern radiating from them.

“Are you sure Abby?” he asked, needing to understand that he had heard correctly.

_“Positive Gibbs,” Abby sniffled again, “I checked and checked; there’s nothing wrong with the radio and on the tape, there’s a blank space that’s about three or so hours long. Gibbs…Tony didn’t have any back-up and he didn’t know.” A couple sobs escaped, “they turned it off…they left him alone.”_

Gibbs hung up after a terse ‘Thank you’ and then, he slowly stood and turned to face his two agents.

McGee and Ziva exchanged looks before looking back at their boss.

“Is everything alright boss?” McGee asked, “Tony ok?”

Gibbs said nothing at first; he just glared at his two agents. Slowly, his blue eyes blanked over in coldness, reminding those who could see him of an empty, cold wasteland like the Arctic.

Ziva and McGee took a step backwards, shivering at the look in their bosses eyes.

“Gibbs?” Ziva called out uncertainly. She was aware of all eyes on them and it left her feeling exposed and she fidgeted, slowly.

“Do you want to tell me,” Gibbs’ voice was soft, yet dangerous, “why Morrison said that Tony called for back-up and no one came?”

McGee and Ziva froze, as did everyone else.

“B-Boss,” McGee stammered out; his heart was pounding because he really didn’t want to answer the question. _‘But can I outright lie to Gibbs?’_ he had no choice, he had to, “Ziva and I were in the car the whole time with the radio on. Tony never called us.”

Gibbs’ eyes went colder. He couldn’t believe that McGee had just lied to him. He shifted his gaze to Ziva.

“He is right Gibbs,” Ziva agreed with McGee, after all, it was the plan they had come up with in the hospital. This was for the best, at least until Tony was better. “Maybe, the radio malfunctioned. It would explain why if Tony had called for help, we never heard anything.”

It took all of Gibbs’ self-control to stop the anger and rage and disgust that wanted to explode out of him. As it was, his control was hanging by a thin thread, ready to snap at any moment.

He said nothing to either agent that would’ve given them a glimpse of storm raging inside of their boss, if he had, they would’ve known. Instead, he pulled out his cell and dialled Abby’s number.

“Abby,” Gibbs said, never taking his eyes off of the two agents in front of him, “I need you to repeat what you told me about the radio.”

At his words, McGee paled and Ziva’s eyes slipped shut briefly.

Gibbs held out his phone and pressed the speaker button. Since the floor was so quiet, Abby’s voice was heard by everyone.

_“There’s nothing wrong with the radio,” Abby said, she had gotten her crying under control, so her voice just quivered, “It didn’t malfunction or anything. The radio was working fine Gibbs.”_

“You want to change your answer McGee? David?” Gibbs demanded, “You want to tell me what really happened out there? Was Morrison right? Did Tony call for back-up?”

McGee and Ziva stared at their boss for a few minutes before dropping their eyes; they couldn’t hold his gaze.

“TELL ME!” Gibbs roared out, making everyone jump, including Abby who was still on the phone, and the director who had arrived at the bullpen to see what was going on.

“That’s what he told us,” McGee answered finally, his voice soft and when he looked up, his eyes were filled with tears, “but we don’t know for sure because-because—

“BECAUSE WHAT? WHY DON’T YOU KNOW?!” Gibbs shouted, cutting him off.

“Because we turned off the radio,” Ziva admitted, “Tony could’ve called for help, but we don’t know because we turned the radio off.”

The floor was quiet, dead quiet, as everyone stared at Gibbs and his team members. No one could believe what they had just heard.

McGee and Ziva had deliberately left their partner without back-up, a partner who was now in the hospital in critical condition.

“You turned off the radio?” Gibbs repeated, “You turned off the radio when you were on a stake-out and you left Tony without back-up. Why?”

Ziva swallowed; how could she answer that question? How could she tell Gibbs that the reason they had turned the radio off was because they were tired of listening to Tony talk?

“ANSWER ME!” Gibbs barked, making them jump again.

McGee looked over at Ziva and saw her look away and he knew, she couldn’t admit the reason why. He wasn’t sure he could either, but somehow, he was able to force the condemning words past the lump in his throat. “We were tired of listening to him talk. He kept rambling and rambling. We just wanted peace and quiet.”

Gibbs stared at both his agents in disbelief, but he wasn’t the only one. Everyone else did as well.

“It was just a joke,” Ziva added on. Her heart ached because she knew that there was no turning back. The truth was out. She had jeopardized not only her career, but her friendships with everyone here.

At her words, Gibbs lost any semblance of control and composure. “A JOKE? A JOKE? TONY IS IN THE HOSPITAL FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE, AND A WOMAN IS DEAD BECAUSE OF YOUR JOKE! DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND THE SEVERITY OF WHAT YOU DID?!”

By the time he was done, Gibbs was shouting. He took a deep, deep breath to try and calm down; it worked, but only slightly, “And if that wasn’t enough, you stood there and you _lied_ to me; you lied right to my face.”

“Boss,” McGee stammered.

“Don’t,” Gibbs warned, “There is _nothing_ you could possibly say that could change this.”

The sound of the elevator drew almost everyone’s attention.

Abby stepped off, Vitalia in her arms, and headed towards Gibbs and the others. There were tears running down her cheeks, but she didn’t care. Her focus was on three people only.

She placed Vitalia next to Gibbs’ desk and walked over to McGee.

“Abby,” McGee started.

SMACK!

McGee’s head flew to the side from the force of the blow and he slowly turned back to face Abby while he held a hand to his stinging cheek. The condemnation in her eyes tore at him.

“How _could_ you?” Abby seethed, green eyes blazing with pain, betrayal and anger, “How could you do that to Tony? To her?” she gestured angrily to Vitalia behind her. “He called for help and you didn’t know, all because of a stupid joke?”

“We are sorry,” Ziva said. She blinked and was surprised to feel the tears on her cheeks. She has not cried since she was a little girl.

“You’re sorry?” Abby scoffed, “Tell that to Tony; tell that to Vitalia; tell that to the woman who died! If you had just done your jobs, everything that happened could’ve been prevented! While you were playing your joke, while you were _ignoring_ Tony, he was fighting.”

She pushed her hands in her pocket and pulled out a tape recorder. Her hands shook as she lifted it in the air for them to see.

“What is that Abby?” Gibbs asked, his voice gruff from the residual anger.

“I managed to get the recordings from Tony’s side of the radio,” Abby said before she glared at McGee and Ziva, “You want to hear what’s on it?” She didn’t wait for them to answer as she pushed play.

_“Guys, I’m gonna go and check out…number 673. I’m getting a bad feeling.”_

_“Ziva! McGee! I need back-up and an ambulance! Hurry!”_

_“McGee…Ziva…answer me! Where are you?...I need your help!”_

_-heavy breathing could be heard- “Z-Ziva…M-McGee…I n-need help…” –even heavier breathing_

At the last recording, most of the females on the floor had their hands over their mouths and their eyes were filled with tears while the males had either turned away, closed their eyes or tighten their hands into fists; they could all clearly hear Tony struggling to breathe.

Abby’s anger had disappeared by the time the second recording was heard and now, her body was hunched slightly over from pain, “Four times…four times he called out for help and you didn’t answer.”

She straightened up and stared at both of them with saddened and pain-filled eyes. When she spoke, her voice was soft and that seemed even worse than if she had yelled, “If Tony dies, I will _never_ forgive you.”

She turned away from them and walked over to Vitalia, picking up the little girl and wrapping her arms tightly around her.

Gibbs just stared at the two agents in front of them. He was still in disbelief over everything that had just happened; to think, he had trained these two, worked with them, trusted them, but looking at them now, he felt as if he didn’t know them. He took a slight step back.

“You’re off my team,” he announced. “I don’t care where you go, but you’re no longer working for me. And if you come anywhere near Tony, you will regret it.”

He walked over to Abby, and placing a hand on her back, he guided her to the elevator, not even sparing a glance backwards.

When the elevator doors closed behind Gibbs and Abby, all eyes turned back to McGee and Ziva.

“Agents McGee, David,” Vance walked up to them, startling both as they had had no idea he was present.

“Director,” both said as one.

“What you did went against every protocol this agency, and others, have,” Vance continued as he stared at the two of them, “You left your teammate on his own, deliberately, knowing that at any moment the situation could’ve turned deadly and it did. Did either of you ever stop to think and ask yourself, what if it wasn’t a domestic dispute Agent DiNozzo had been caught up in? What if he had found the terrorist you were searching for?”

Both agents shifted on their feet at the words, because no, they _hadn’t_ stopped to consider all that.

Vance continued, “Never have I been so disappointed and disgusted in the actions of two agents before. Turn in your badge and your gun. You’re suspended without pay for two weeks; at the end of those two weeks, you will have a disciplinary hearing to determine your future at NCIS. Over the course of the two weeks however, you will be subjected to Internal Affairs.”

“IA?” McGee questioned.

“Of course,” Vance nodded, “an agent was hurt.”

“We did not mean for this to happen,” Ziva said as she removed both her badge and her gun.

“Whether you meant for it to happen or not,” Vance said as he took them from her, “the point is, it did.” He took McGee’s as well, “Now, I suggest you clear your desk and leave, unless you would like to be escorted out by security.”

With that, he turned and headed for the stairs, leaving the two agents—former—staring after him.

McGee and Ziva didn’t look at each other as they went to their desks and collected their belongings. They were aware of the whispers and dirty looks from the other agents, but they ignored them.

As they were heading to the elevator, an agent stopped them. “What did Tony ever do to you that made you do this to him? Tony has been nothing but friendly to you, to the both of you, since you started working here and this is how you repay him?”

Another agent spoke up, “It shouldn’t surprise me though; they’ve always treated Tony like they were better than him. Especially you McGee; you think that just because you know your way around computers and because you graduated from MIT that you’re a better person and agent than Tony, well you’re wrong. It takes more than that to be an agent, and it’s obvious you don’t have it.”

McGee ducked his head in shame and avoided eye contact as he continued walking. He pressed the elevator for the lobby and wished it along faster.

“You do not understand,” Ziva glared at the agent.

“I don’t understand?” the agent, Matthew Donovan, repeated with a scoff, “I’ve been working here a lot longer than you have David, longer than McGee even, and that means, I’ve been around Tony longer than any of you and I may not be close to him, but it seems it doesn’t matter because I still treat him better than either of you do. You think we don’t hear the snide remarks and insults that you try to disguise as friendly comments? Tony may be a prankster, but his pranks have never been harmful and his jokes have never been anything more than that, but the things that two of you say to him and then claim to be joking about? That’s not joking, that’s just being cruel.”

“Funny thing is,” the first agent, Steve Williams, added, “For him being a prankster, when it came down to crunch time, you could always count on Tony to have your back. And he never would’ve done what you did. And that, that right there, is what makes him a better agent than either of you will ever be.”

The elevator doors opened and McGee and Ziva quickly stepped in. Hitting the button for the lobby, they waited for the doors to close, just before they did, Matt had something else to say.

“I hope your need for peace and quiet was worth it because you’ve lost any respect and any friends that you may have had here,” he said.

The doors closed and McGee sagged against the back wall. “Oh God.”

Ziva took in a shaky breath and closed her eyes to get her emotions under control; it wasn’t working as well as she hoped. A prank, a simple and stupid prank and now, she could be losing her job and Tony could die. What had she done? How could she have been so foolish? Vance was right; they had broken every protocol and Gibbs’ rule number *nineteen;

  _Never leave your partner without back-up_

They had done the exact opposite. Not only had they left Tony alone, they had done so deliberately.

When they elevator opened to the lobby, the two walked out and wasn’t surprised at the glares they got from the people on the floor. News did travel fast through the NCIS grapevine.

As they left the building and headed for their cars, they stopped and looked at each other.

“We royally screwed up,” McGee was the first to talk.

“We did,” Ziva nodded, her dark eyes unfathomable.  “I cannot believe Gibbs kicked us off his team.”

“Neither can I,” McGee blew off, “But we deserved it.” he paused, “I wish I could go back; I never would’ve turned off the radio, or I would’ve turned it back on sooner.” He let out a frustrated groan, “How were we supposed to know anything would’ve happened?”

“We could not have,” Ziva agreed, “but that is no excuse. What we did, it was wrong. We knew it was wrong, and yet we did it anyway. I do not know what I am going to do now. Being a part of Gibbs’ team—

“I know,” McGee nodded, “I loved being a part of this team; it was like our own little family.”

“And we broke that,” Ziva sighed. “Not only have we lost our positions as members of Team Gibbs, but we may also lose our jobs.”

“Tony was counting on us to have his six,” McGee said, his eyes filling with tears once more, “but we didn’t and because of what we did, because of us, a woman is dead and Tony could die.”

No more was said and everything was quiet. Soon enough, the two walked away from each other and headed to their cars, each lost in their own thoughts.

~…~

As Gibbs drove to the hospital, both he and Abby were quiet, lost in their thoughts on what they had just found out. They still couldn’t believe what Ziva and McGee had done. It wasn’t sinking in as yet.

Gibbs glanced over at Abby and his heart ached to see the pain and betrayal etched on her face. He knew that it was seriously hurting her; when Ziva had first joined the team, it had taken her a while to get used to the Mossad agent, but eventually, she had and soon enough the two women had become really close. While Ziva hadn’t taken Kate’s place in Abby’s heart, she had managed to create her own.

And McGee; Abby had gotten used to him almost immediately. He knew the guy had feelings for her, even Abby knew it, but she hadn’t let it interfere with their friendship. The two had become close.

Tony though; Tony had been Abby’s big brother from the moment they became friends. True, they hadn’t gotten along at first, mostly because Abby had thought that Tony would replace her as Gibbs’ favourite, but after she had realized that wasn’t the case, she had opened up to Tony and the two had quickly become as thick as thieves.

So for them to do this, and to Tony, he knew it was killing her because it was killing him. He worked with them day by day, he trusted them, and they had betrayed that.

“What are we going to do Gibbs?” Abby asked, breaking his concentration. “I mean, Ziva and McGee…what they did…how can we get past that? How can we forgive them?”

Gibbs’ hands tightened around the steering wheel. Honestly, he wasn’t sure he wanted to forgive them. “I don’t know Abbs.”

Nothing was more said and soon after, the two pulled up to the hospital. After parking, they quickly made their way inside and up to Tony’s room.

“Jethro, Abigail,” Ducky greeted when he saw the door open and saw them walk in.

“Is everything ok?” Palmer asked, taking in Abby’s tear-streaked face.

Abby looked at Gibbs before walking over to the chair next to Tony’s bed. She dropped down, careful of Vitalia, who was sleeping, and gently reached out to touch him. The entire day had been horrible and right now, she needed him…even if he couldn’t hear or talk to her.

“No, everything is not ok,” Gibbs answered gruffly.

Ducky got up out the chair on the other side of Tony’s bed, allowing Gibbs to take it and moved to the chair next to the door, pulling it closer. “What happened Jethro? And where are Timothy and Ziva? I would’ve thought they’d rejoin us.”

Gibbs looked up and glared at Ducky, while Abby ducked her head and bit her lip.

“If those two know what’s good for them,” Gibbs growled out, “They’ll stay the hell away from here.”

Palmer frowned, as did Ducky.

“Jethro,” Ducky reprimanded gently, “You cannot keep them away from their teammate. They deserve to be here.”

“No they damn well don’t!” Gibbs snapped, “Not when it’s their fault Tony’s here in the first place.”

“What do you mean?” Palmer asked, looking from Gibbs to Abby.

With a sigh, Abby explained everything to the two men. When she was done, both men were frowning, but Ducky’s eyes held an anger that she had seen only once before on the old man, and that was when Ari had shot Gerald.

“Are you saying that Ziva and Timothy deliberately cut off all communications between themselves and Anthony and then proceeded to _lie_ about it?” Ducky asked.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying Duck,” Gibbs hands balled into fists as he thought again on what the two had done.

“Oh my,” Ducky closed his eyes as anger flashed through him. To think that two of the people he had considered family had done such a thing, and to someone who did not deserve it. “I can’t believe they did that.”

Palmer, who was frowning down at the ground, looked up at Ducky’s words, “I can.”

Three set of eyes snapped over to him and his face flushed at being under their scrutiny and for a second, he considered not saying anything, but then, his gaze settled on Tony. He took a deep breath, “Ziva and McGee have always treated Tony like crap.”

Abby frowned; though she was very angry, and possibly a little hateful towards the two for what they did to Tony, she didn’t agree with Palmer. “That’s not true.”

Palmer just stared at her, “Yes it is. You may not have seen it Abby, but it is true. I didn’t realize it when I first started working here, but eventually I did. I know that Tony plays a lot of pranks, and that he’s nosy sometimes, but I didn’t care. To me, he was just being Tony and in his own way, he was just showing he cared and that we mattered to him. His being nosy was just another way to show him being concerned. But McGee and Ziva, and even Kate when she was still alive, sometimes they treated Tony as if they were better than him. It was like to them, Tony was nothing more than a college frat boy who never grew up.

“I know that they were joking, but sometimes, the things they said, they seemed more cruel than funny. McGee always throws the fact that Tony had a lot of money as a child back in his face and is always teasing him about having a spoiled childhood or being upset if he didn’t get what he wanted, but that’s not true and he doesn’t know, or he doesn’t care, how much it actually hurts Tony.”

“Palmer,” Abby interrupted, not wanting to hear anymore.

“No Abby,” Palmer shook his head, his voice firm and steady and filled with determination, stunning Abby, as well as the other two, into silence, “This needs to be said. You know Tony had a crappy childhood, but they don’t, because they never bothered to find out. All they saw was the designer clothes and they know who Tony’s father is, but they don’t know Tony. They see that he came from money and so they think he was a spoiled, rich kid. McGee thinks that just because he graduated from MIT or wherever it was, that he’s superior to Tony; Kate thought that just because she protected the President, she had more of a right to be an agent than Tony did and Ziva, well I don’t know her, and I really don’t want to either. But the point is, all three of them feel as if Tony doesn’t deserve to be an Agent, especially Agent Gibbs’ Second in Command.”

he turned to Gibbs, “When you had taken that leave of absence a few years ago and Tony had been left in charge, that’s when I fully realized just how little respect both Ziva and McGee had for Tony; they constantly questioned his decisions, sometimes even going so far as to outright ignore them.

“They constantly belittled him and kept reminding him that he wasn’t you, so he should stop trying to act like a boss. They didn’t seem to care that Tony _was_ the boss because he had the longest experience as an NCIS agent and he was your Second in Command. Almost every night, Tony stayed back late at the office to finish up the reports that Ziva and McGee had refused to do from earlier in the day.”

“I didn’t know that,” Abby frowned over at Tony then at Palmer.

“Of course you didn’t,” Palmer shook his head, “because whether you realize it or not, you acted the same towards Tony, and so did you Dr. Mallard.”

“Mr. Palmer,” Ducky reprimanded at the same time that Abby let out an angry “What?”

Palmer swallowed at the look on their faces and had to steel himself not to bolt from the room. _‘What the hell am I doing? I should just stop talking; yeah…just stop talking.’_ His eyes moved to Tony’s almost involuntarily and immediately, he knew he couldn’t. He knew Tony wouldn’t have said anything, and this was his chance of finally voicing all the shit that Tony had suffered through because of Ziva and McGee and everyone else. _‘Oh well, in for a penny, in for a pound.’_

Taking a deep breath, he continued, but he kept his gaze on Tony, almost as if to draw strength from the unconscious man, “The whole time Agent Gibbs was gone, Tony kept everything together, or he tried to. While everyone had been angry about Agent Gibbs’ sudden departure, Tony had understood. I asked him why he wasn’t angry like everyone else;

_Flashback_

_“Are you angry too?” Palmer looked over Tony. They had decided to eat their lunch at a restaurant not too far from NCIS, not wanting to be around the others right now._

_“Angry?” Tony frowned at his friend, even as he poured ketchup over his fries. “Why?”_

_“Agent Gibbs and how he left,” Palmer explained as he took a bite out of his sandwich._

_“No,” Tony shook his head._

_“Why?” Palmer asked, needing to understand. He knew Tony had an amazing ability to not let things get to him, but this was different._

_“Jimmy,” Tony leaned back in his seat, “you need to understand something. Gibbs woke up in the hospital with virtually no memory of the last nineteen years; to him, it must feel like he’s just lost his wife and kid, and on top of that, the moment he gets out of the hospital, the country that he had once sworn to protect and serve and fought for, showed basically no mercy or compassion when that Naval ship was allowed to be destroyed. That was like a double whammy for Gibbs, so I don’t blame him for wanting to get away. Hell, if it was me, I would’ve run too.”_

_“But what about how he left you in charge?” Palmer asked, “doesn’t that make you a little upset.”_

_“Nope,” Tony shook his head as he took a sip of his drink. “Why? Because despite not having all his memories back, Gibbs’_ “You’ll do” _tells me that there was still enough of him there that remembered that I am a good agent and that he could trust me to do the job he knows I can do.”_

_Palmer thought on that for a few minutes before nodding. “Ok.”_

_“Don’t worry my little Autopsy Gremlin,” Tony grinned, “Gibbs will be back and be the hard-ass marine we know and love.”_

_Palmer grimaced at that and Tony couldn’t help but to laugh._

_End flashback_

Palmer shook his head, “the thing of it is,” Gibbs, Ducky and Abby had turned to look at Tony as Palmer spoke, turned back to Palmer as he continued, “everyone was so busy being angry and missing Gibbs, that no one paid any attention to Tony. Tony made sure everyone was ok; he brought Abby her Cafpows, he would come down to autopsy and sit and listen to Dr. Mallard, he did Ziva and McGee’s unfinished reports, he kept everyone from falling apart while he himself was falling apart. All of you were so busy in how you were feeling, that you didn’t realize, or care, about how Tony was reacting to Gibbs’ leaving.”

He turned and glared at Gibbs. Later, he would wonder just how he had managed to survive doing that without Gibbs destroying him. “And you Agent Gibbs, when you came back; you just pushed Tony to the side. You threw all his stuff back on his desk without a word. Not even a good job Tony or I’m proud that you stepped up and took care of things for me. Nothing. And McGee and Ziva, when they saw that, they just rubbed it in his face, basically reminding him of what they had been saying all along, that he wasn’t you and he wasn’t good enough to be a team leader. And you Agent Gibbs did nothing to stop them.”

Gibbs glared at Palmer and stood up with such force that his chair flew back, making them jump and waking Vitalia.

Palmer flinched and tried to press himself as far back into the chair as he could go as he watched Gibbs walk towards him. _‘Oh God. I knew it. I’m gonna die. Why didn’t I just keep my mouth shut?’_

But Gibbs didn’t even glance at Palmer as he stormed out of the room.

Palmer’s body sagged back into his seat from relief. “I can’t believe I just went off on Agent Gibbs. Oh God he’s gonna kill me.”

“I wouldn’t worry Mr. Palmer,” Ducky said softly, “Jethro has a habit of not wanting to hear when something has been his fault, especially when it comes to Anthony.”

Abby wiped her tears. She couldn’t believe everything that Palmer had said. But when she thought back to the few months Gibbs had been gone, she realized that Palmer was right; they, she especially, had treated Tony unfairly. Tony had comforted her about her missing Gibbs, but not once had she thought about how he was feeling.

Ducky sat back in his chair, his eyes on the body on the bed. His heart ached at his assistant’s words for he knew it was the truth. Looking back, he was appalled at his own actions and for being too caught up in his pain to realize Tony had been hurting just as much.

“Oh my dear boy,” Ducky said softly, “We have wronged you haven’t we?”

He looked up and saw Vitalia staring at Tony. His mind took in the little girl and a thought came to him. “Abigail, I do suspect that that little girl needs something to eat. She has been at the hospital for hours now and I’m sure she is quite hungry.”

Abby’s green eyes went wide before she looked down at Vitalia. “Are you hungry?”

Vitalia bit her lip and nodded slowly.

“Oh sweetie, why didn’t you say something?” Abby hugged her briefly. “Come on, let’s go get something to eat and then we’ll come right back here, ok?”

“Ok,” Vitalia nodded and allowed Abby to place on the ground.

“Do you guys need anything?” Abby turned to Ducky and Palmer. She needed to get out of the room; Palmer’s words kept echoing through her mind and she needed to get away.

Palmer shook his head, not taking his eyes off of Tony.

“I am fine,” Ducky smiled. “Go on. We’ll stay with Tony.”

“Ok,” Abby nodded, “We’ll be back.”

~…~

Gibbs paced the corridor around the corner from Tony’s room. Palmer’s words rung in his head and he let out a growl, one that scared the doctor that had been walking by, causing the man to increase his pace.

How dare the man say those things! As if he would condone anyone hurting Tony! He’d kill them first.

But even as that thought completed itself, he couldn’t help the flow of memories that raced across his mind; images after images, of Ziva and McGee’s heckling and their words to Tony. He saw it all from a new perspective.

As his mind went through each memory, his agitated pacing slowed until he stopped and he leaned against the wall as the realization that Palmer was right slammed into him; he could see the cruelty in each word they had thrown at Tony; how mean their so-called jokes were.

But it was his own actions that had him reeling. He _had_ allowed Ziva and McGee to get away with things, especially with what they said to Tony. But at the time, he had done nothing because he knew Tony could hold his own against the two of them. And if he was honest, deep down, he had used it as a means to keep Tony at arms-length emotionally because he hadn’t wanted to give into the feelings regarding his 2iC.

_‘Was I such a bastard that I let things get that far? Was it so much easier to ignore their hurting Tony than to admit how I felt about him?’_

Gibbs ran a hand through his hair. _‘I have to fix this. But how?’_

With a groan, Gibbs leaned off the wall and headed back to Tony’s room. He knew there was only one way to fix it and that was to do something he hated to do; talk about his feelings.

But, if he wanted Tony in his life as more than a boss and his second in command—and he did—then he would have to talk. Tony needed to know how sorry he was about everything and more importantly, he needed to know how he felt about him and that he wanted a future with him.

When he got back to the room, he saw that Abby and Vitalia were gone. He turned to Ducky to ask, but the ME spoke before he could.

“It is getting late, so Abigail took Vitalia to get something to eat, and I suspect a set of clothes as well,” Ducky answered.

“Ok,” Gibbs nodded and walked over to Tony’s side, retaking his seat. “Would you give me some time with him?”

“Of course,” Ducky nodded as he stood up, “Come along Mr. Palmer.”

Palmer stood up and looked at Gibbs, “Agent Gibbs, I just w-want you to know that—

“It’s ok Palmer,” Gibbs cut him, not wanting to listen to the man’s continued stuttering.

Palmer bit his lip and then he turned and followed Ducky out of the room.

Gibbs watched them leave before turning back to Tony. He knew what he wanted to say, but he had no idea how to say it. But that couldn’t stop him. He had to figure out how to say it because he had already lost so much time with Tony.

After staring at Tony for almost ten minutes, he finally figured out where to start; he was about to break one of his rules. “Tony…I’m sorry…so sorry about everything. I should never have let this get this far. I should’ve stopped it from the start.” He sighed, “I honestly didn’t think it would get this bad. I have no excuse Tony.”

He reached out and touched Tony’s arm, gently, “Hurting you was the last thing I ever wanted to do, and by ignoring what was going on, I did just that. I made you feel as if you weren’t important to the team, to me, and you are. You mean more to me than you believe you do and part of that is my fault; it’s my fault for not letting you know, for letting you think you were replaceable, because you’re not.

“This job, it’s dangerous, and every day we go out and we do it, it’s with the possibility that we might not come back. I don’t worry about myself, or even get scared, but when it comes to you, I can’t help it. Why is it always you Tony? Why is it always you that ends up in trouble? Every time you get hurt, I feel like I lose my mind. When you had the plague, I had never been more scared. That’s when I admitted to myself how really felt about you and that’s when it sunk in that I could lose you. But instead of telling you, I buried my feelings. I’m a grumpy bastard Tony, but you know that.”

Gibbs groaned, “Aw hell Tony, I’m no good at this. I’ve been divorced three times for crying out loud. But you, you’re different. You make me different. Ducky and Abby have known me the longest, and yet, you are closer to me than any of them. You know me better than anyone. The last person to know me like that was…Shannon. What I’m trying to say is, I love you. I’m in love with you. I never thought I’d feel this way about anyone, not after Shannon, but I do.”

He leaned closer to Tony, placing his lips near Tony’s ear, “Listen to me DiNozzo; are you listening? You’re mine Tony. And I refuse to let you go, you hear me? So don’t you dare give up…not now. I’m gonna be right here waiting for you.”

With that, he leaned back and relaxed back into the chair. He kept one hand on Tony’s arm and his eyes fell close as he relaxed slightly for the first time since he had gotten the call from Tony earlier that day.

When Abby and the others came back to the room, Vitalia pulled away from Abby and went to Gibbs. Without saying anything, she climbed up into his lap and settled down, falling asleep quickly with her head resting on his chest.

Gibbs opened his eyes and stared at Vitalia for a few minutes and then shifted his gaze to the other three. “You guys should head home; come back in the morning.”

“No,” Abby shook her head and retook her seat, “We’re not leaving. We want to be here to watch Tony pull through the night and show the doctors that he’s not giving up.” She looked at Palmer, then at Tony, “I need to be here; to let him know that I’m sorry; that I didn’t mean to make him feel like he wasn’t important enough or good enough. I need him to understand.”

“It’s ok Abby,” Gibbs tried to soothe her.

“No it’s not,” Abby shook her head, “Jimmy was right. We haven’t treated Tony fairly a lot of times in the past, and he didn’t deserve that.”

Gibbs stared at her and after a few minutes, he nodded. “Ok.” He turned to the other two, “You’re not leaving either, are you?”

Ducky and Palmer said nothing, they only took up their previous seats around the room.

Gibbs could only shake his head and shift his body slightly so that both he and Vitalia would be more comfortable, and then, he slowly fell back asleep, the others following soon after.

That was the scene the doctors and nurses saw every time they looked through Tony’s window.

~….~

_The next morning_

It was his years of military training and as an agent that the sensation of someone else close reached Gibbs deep in his unconsciousness and slowly pulled him to the surface. His eyes opened to slits and he took in the sight of one of the nurses changing Tony’s IV bag.

He opened his eyes fully as his gaze shifted from the nurse to Tony. Was it him, or did Tony look a little better.

“Oh!” the nurse jumped slightly when she saw that Gibbs was awake. “I didn’t even realize you were up. I’m sorry if I woke you. I tried to be quiet.”

“It’s ok,” Gibbs replied, his voice a little gruff from sleep.

The door opened and Brad stepped in, followed by Dr. Hale. “Gibbs.”

“Brad, Dr. Hale,” Gibbs nodded to the two men. “What’s going on?”

“Well, we have good news,” Brad smiled.

“Is Tony ok?” Abby asked; the two men entering the room had woken her, as well as Ducky and Palmer.

“Is everything ok?” Palmer asked, looking between the two doctors.

“Well, we were just about to tell Agent Gibbs the news,” Dr. Hale said.

“And what news would that be?” Ducky asked.

“Well obviously Tony pulled through the night,” Brad chuckled, “and even better, his vitals are a lot stronger than they were. If they continue getting stronger, we can pull him from the medical induced coma as early as either tonight or tomorrow morning.”

Abby almost jumped up from her seat to start dancing, but she remembered herself and settled for grinning widely. She turned to look at Tony, “I knew you’d do it Tony. I knew it!”

“Oh my dear boy,” Ducky chuckled softly as he wiped the tears from his cheeks.

Palmer grinned, unable—or unwilling—to say anything but the happiness was shining from his eyes.

Vitalia looked up at Gibbs, “Lui sta bene?” _(He ok?)_

Gibbs looked at her and nodded, “Si.” He looked back at Tony, “Guarira’ completamente.” _(Yes. He’s going to be just fine.)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** and that’s the chapter. The scene with Palmer talking out against Ziva and McGee, I hope it was ok, and also, Gibbs; again, I’m not sure if I’m capturing who Gibbs is and so, there’s a possibility—big one—that he’s OOC when he’s talking to Tony. Anyways, since you’re at this point, review so I can know what you thought. 
> 
> *not entirely sure if this is a rule and if it is, if it’s really for that number; if anyone know the correct number for that rule, or the correct rule for that number, I would so love it if you could tell me. If you don’t, then I’ll just leave it as is*laughs*


	5. Truths

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** NCIS and all its affiliates belong to its creators Donald P. Bellisario and Don McGill, and CBS Television. No trademark or copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made from this. In other words, I DO NOT own.
> 
> “Speaking”  
>  _‘Thinking’  
>  “Speaking over the phone”_

* * *

_Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down--_ Unknown

* * *

 

It’s been four days since Tony had been rushed to the hospital, and three days since the others had gotten the news that Tony was going to be ok.

True to their word, the doctors had removed Tony out of the medical induced coma, but had explained that doing that wouldn’t guarantee that Tony would wake; that his body and mind had been through tremendous stress and needed to recuperate.

So in essence, Tony would wake when _he_ felt like waking.

Despite the fact that Tony was unconscious, his vitals remained strong and improved each day, so they moved him out of ICU and to a regular room.

But Gibbs and the others had something else occupying their thoughts. 

Gibbs, Abby and Vitalia were sitting in Tony’s hospital room talking in low tones as to not disturb the sleeping girl.

“Gibbs what are we going to do?” Abby said as she looked at Vitalia in the older man’s arms. “We can’t let them take her.”

“I know Abbs,” Gibbs nodded.

The day after Tony had been admitted, a social worker had shown up at the hospital.

_Flashback_

_Gibbs stepped out of Tony’s room and crossed the hall to lean against the wall opposite the door. His body felt relaxed, or marginally more relaxed than yesterday when he had gotten the call about Tony. Hearing that not only had Tony made it through the night but that his vitals were stronger was such a relief._

_The clicking of heels on the floor had him looking up and he saw a woman heading in his direction. She was dressed in a black, knee-length skirt with a blue, short-sleeve top and had a briefcase in her hand._

_Gibbs watched with narrowed eyes as the woman walked directly to Tony’s door. He straightened off the wall. “You mind telling me who the hell you are and why you’re entering that room?”_

_The woman jumped and whirled around, brown eyes wide with a little fear and shock. “Oh my God, you scared me! I didn’t see you there.”_

_Gibbs just stared at her._

_The woman fidgeted, obviously uncomfortable with being pinned under the harsh and unrelenting stare. After a few more minutes of staring, the woman shifted her gaze and took a deep breath, silently chiding herself for her reaction, and when she spoke, she was thankful her voice was steady, “My name is Margaret Trenton. I’m from Child Protective Services.”_

_Gibbs’ body froze at her words. He knew immediately what she was there for; Vitalia._

_“It is to my understanding that you have a little girl in your company; four year old Vitalia Morrison,” Margaret stated._

_“What about her?” Gibbs asked, though he already knew the answer to the question._

_“Due to the fact that her mother is dead and her father is the one responsible and now resides in jail,” Margaret said, “Vitalia will be placed into foster care until her closest living relative can be found.”_

_Gibbs’ eyes narrowed. “No.”_

_Margaret startled and looked up at him with a frown, “Sir-_

_“It’s Agent Gibbs,” Gibbs cut her off, “and you are not leaving with that little girl.”_

_“I’m afraid, Agent Gibbs,” Margaret glared at him, “you have no say in the matter. Ms. Morrison is not of any relation to you, therefore, where she goes is not your choice. Vitalia will be coming with me.”_

_Gibbs took a step towards the woman, the Gibbs’ glare in full effect, inwardly smirking when he she took a step back and her knuckles turned white from the force of her grip on her briefcase._

_“Let me tell you something,” Gibbs spoke, his voice low and unforgiving, “that little girl in there has been through hell and right now, the only people she trusts, the only people she wants to be around is in that room. You are not taking her anywhere.”_

_Margaret mentally cursed herself for her step back and for showing her fear. She had been doing this job for years, and had thought that she had met every difficult person there was, but obviously she was wrong. But, she had a job to do. “Listen Agent Gibbs, the law is the law and that little girl is coming with me.”_

_“You…are…not…taking…her…anywhere,” Gibbs repeated slowly. He took another step closer, “You want her, go get a court order. In the meantime, leave, and don’t come back.”_

_Margaret glared at Gibbs, “I will get that order, and then, that little girl is coming with me.”_

_With that, she turned and walked away._

_Gibbs watched her leave, and then pulled out his cell, dialling the director’s number. “Leon?” he said the moment the director answered, “I need a favour.”_

“Gibbs?” Abby called softly, drawing the man from his memory, “Do you think the director will be able to help?”

“I hope so Abby,” Gibbs sighed. He hadn’t heard back from Leon about getting temporary custody of Vitalia. There was no way he was letting the little girl out of his sight. Not when Tony had gone through hell to save her.

The door opening drew their attention and they watched as Palmer and Ducky walked in.

“Good morning,” Ducky greeted with a smile, “how is our favourite patient?”

Abby smiled in response, “getting stronger.”

“Well that’s good,” Palmer grinned as he took a seat close to Abby, and as far away from Gibbs as he could. While they had spent the last four days in close proximity, he still didn’t feel completely comfortable around the man, especially after he had pretty much yelled at him that first night when Tony was admitted.

“Hopefully he will awaken soon,” Ducky said as he took his own seat.

“Hopefully,” Abby agreed with a smile. She looked over at Tony, “We need you Tony, so you need to wake up.”

They had just settled down when the door opened. While Abby and the others looked at the woman standing there in confusion, Gibbs’ eyes narrowed and he stood up, careful of Vitalia in his arms.

The little girl woke up though and stared at the woman in confusion even as she moved to wrap an arm around Gibbs’ neck.

“What the hel-heck are you doing here?” Gibbs demanded.

Margaret smirked, “I told you I would be back Agent Gibbs.”

“Gibbs?” Abby questioned softly, wondering who the woman was.

“My name is Margaret Trenton,” Margaret smiled at the other occupants in the room, but it was polite, not friendly, “And I’m with CPS.”

The three gasped and Abby’s eyes darted towards Vitalia.

“I told you you’re not taking her,” Gibbs growled.

“And I told you, you can’t stop me,” Margaret stared at him with narrowed eyes, mentally congratulating herself on not shaking, “especially with this.” She pulled some papers out of her bag, “it’s a court order, stating that child is to go with me and her custody belongs to the state.”

Vitalia’s eyes went wide and she let out a whimper as she tightened her arm around Gibbs’ neck. She didn’t like what the woman was saying. She didn’t want to go with her; she was supposed to stay with Tony. The angels left him for her, no one else.

“I’m afraid that’s not possible,” a new voice said and everyone looked up to see Vance standing in the doorway.

“Excuse me, but who are you and why is it not possible?” Margaret demanded.

“My name is Leon Vance, Director of NCIS,” Vance stated, “And that little girl is not going anywhere.”

Margaret sighed, “I understand everyone is feeling protective of this little girl, especially due to the circumstances surrounding how she came to be in your care, but I have a court order stating that—

“What a coincidence,” Vance cut her off sharply, “so do I, and my court order is signed by three different judges. Custody of Vitalia Morrison is awarded to Agent Anthony DiNozzo, _and_ ,” Vance spoke over her when he saw her opening her mouth to speak, “due do Agent DiNozzo’s condition, the custody is transferred to Agent Gibbs until Agent DiNozzo is able to care for her.”

Five stunned faces looked up at Vance. Neither one of them believing what they were hearing.

“And this is real? It’s not a ploy to not let her end up in the system?” Margaret was the first to break the silence.

“It’s real and legal,” Vance said firmly, “like I said, I have signatures from three different judges, who were very sympathetic after it was explained in detail what was going on. So, I appreciate you doing your job and coming down here, but as you can see, your services are no longer needed. Vitalia stays here.”

Margaret looked around the room, noting the happy smiles on everyone’s faces and the smug grin on Agent Gibbs’. Sighing, she stuffed her papers back in her bag, “Agent Gibbs, I was only harsh because I was doing my job and I wanted what was best for that little girl, especially after the hell she’s been through.”

Gibbs’ smug grin faded slightly and he nodded at the woman, “Understandable, but taking her away would’ve hurt her more than help her.”

Margaret nodded, her eyes taking in the way the little girl was resting so trustingly in the man’s arms. If there was one thing she had learned on this job, was that children were very good judge of characters. “You do know you’re work is not over? CPS will be sending someone over to check on her to make sure everything is ok? They will not let this go so easily.”

“We know,” Gibbs nodded, his blue eyes filling with determination, “they can come, but let them know that we are not letting go of her. She belongs to us.”

Margaret gave a nod and left the room. When she was gone, all eyes turned to Vance.

“I suppose your timing could not have been better Leon,” Ducky chuckled.

Vance stepped further into the room, letting the door close behind him.

“It’s true?” Abby asked looking at the director, “Vitalia stays with us?”

“She’s not going anywhere,” Vance assured her, and the rest, with a nod. “Gibbs has custody until DiNozzo recovers.”

The door opening had everyone turning towards it.

“Well isn’t this a party?” Jackson Gibbs remarked as he walked into the room.

“Dad?” Gibbs narrowed his eyes at his father. “What are you doing here?”

“I called him,” Abby admitted as she bit her lip. “I know how close he and Tony were and I knew he’d want to know.”

“Leave her alone Leroy,” Jackson scolded his son. “It’s a good thing she did because you wouldn’t have done it.”

Gibbs ran a hand over his face. His dad could always make him agitated, “Yes I would’ve dad. I know what you mean to Tony. I didn’t because I wanted to be sure Tony was out of the woods.”

Jackson nodded, understanding and accepting his son’s reasoning. His gaze drifted to the little girl in his son’s arms who was watching everything with curious dark blue eyes. “And this must be Vitalia. Hello there; my name is Jackson. I’m _his_ father.” He pointed towards Gibbs with a smile.

Vitalia cocked her head to the side and stared at the man. He seemed nice and he reminded her of the man holding her. She looked up at him and then looked back at the man and smiled.

Jackson’s grin widened when he saw how the girl looked towards his son first. He always knew Leroy had a way with children, but after losing Shannon and Kelly, his son hadn’t interacted much with young kids after that. It was good to see that underneath all of his anger, hurt, cynicism and being an all-around-bastard, there was still that man.

Gibbs looked around the room, not stopping the warmth that filled him. He may have issues with his father and Vance, but the fact that they were there, made him feel good; though he wouldn’t tell Leon that. _This_ was Tony’s family, and all it needed was for him to wake up.

As if his thoughts were heard, the machine monitoring Tony’s vitals started beeping faster.

“What’s going on?” Palmer asked as they all looked towards Tony, hoping it wasn’t a relapse.

“I’ll get the doctor,” Vance said as he moved towards the door. He had just opened it when Abby gasped.

“Abby?” Gibbs called out, shifting his hold on Vitalia.

Abby wasn’t paying attention though, she was looking down at her hand, the one holding Tony’s. “Tony?”

And she felt it again, the slight pressure on her hand. She looked up at the others with tears in her eyes, “He squeezed my hand.”

Gasps of excitement left the group and they all seemed to lean forward.

Gibbs reached out and placed on hand on Tony’s head, “DiNozzo, can you hear me?”

To their astonishment, Tony’s head turned slightly to Gibbs’ voice and they saw the rapid movement of his eyes below his close lids and the way said lids fluttered.

“Get the doctor,” Gibbs told Vance without even looking away from Tony, “Tony…come on…that’s it…open your eyes.”

Dr. Pitt and Dr. Hale stepped into the room just in time to see Tony open his eyes.

“Hey,” Gibbs smiled briefly when he saw the green eyes looking at him. “Welcome back.”

Dr. Pitt hurried over to the bedside, Dr. Hale following. “I know you guys don’t want to, but I need you to step outside just for a moment.”

Gibbs saw the way Tony tensed at the Dr’s words, so he reassured him, “Don’t worry. We’re just gonna step out for a minute so the doctors can work on you. We’ll be right back, I promise.”

Tony’s body relaxed in relief. He felt better knowing Gibbs would be close by.

The group stepped out the room and Jackson pulled Abby to him and wrapped his arms around her.

“He’s awake,” Abby cried as she curled into Jackson’s embrace, “He’s awake.”

“Yes he is,” Ducky wiped his tears, though a smile filled his face. “Our boy is going to be fine.”

“He is a fighter,” Jackson grinned.

“I’m going to call Jackie and let her know,” Vance said, “she and the kids have been worried.”

Gibbs nodded without saying anything, his attention more on his Second in Command than anything.

About ten minutes later, the door opened and the three nurses came out, each of them smiling.

“You can go in now,” one of them said.

“Thank you,” Ducky replied for the group and they all made their way back inside.

When they got back inside, they were pleased to see that Tony was no longer intubated and he was now wearing a nasal cannula.

“How’s he doing doc?” Gibbs asked as he made his way back to his customary chair.

It wasn’t the doctor that answered.

“I-I’m f-fine,” Tony’s voice was hoarse from being intubated and not being in use. He looked at each of them, his eyes holding confusion when he saw Vance, but lighting up when he saw Jack. “H-Hey.”

“Don’t speak Tony,” Jackson advised with a smile, “Although it is good to hear your voice.”

“Never thought I’d miss that,” Gibbs grunted, the teasing clearly heard in his voice.

Tony turned his head to glare at him, but lost it when he saw the little girl in his arms. He stared at her in confusion, but seconds later, his eyes went wide as everything came rushing back to him.

And then, his monitors started going crazy.

“Tony!” Dr. Pitt grabbed his shoulder. “Calm down!”

“Abbs!” Gibbs called the girl to him and when she came, he stood and passed Vitalia to her. Hands free, he stepped closer to Tony’s bed, resting a hand on his agent’s head, “Tony…hey, look at me,” when he had his attention, he continued, “it’s ok…calm down…just breathe…”

Dr. Hale stepped close with a syringe, but Brad stopped him. “Wait.”

“Relax Tony,” Gibbs ordered softly, “and breathe…slowly…”

Tony’s eyes never strayed from Gibbs and as always, he followed his boss’ instructions.

“That’s it,” Gibbs praised softly. He let out a sigh of relief when he saw Tony’s heart rate and blood pressure stabilize. “Scare me like that again DiNozzo, and I’ll head slap you into next week.”

“G-got it boss,” Tony wheezed out as his breathing calmed down and he relaxed into his bed. He closed his eyes briefly and reopened them.

Dr. Hale looked at them in shock, but Brad chuckled, “Never could disobey him, could you?”

Tony’s eyes flew to the doctors, “Hey Brad.”

“How are you feeling?” Brad asked.

“Tired,” Tony replied softly.

“That’s normal,” Brad nodded, “You’ve been through hell Tony. I know you hate this, but it’s standard procedure. Do you know where you are?”

“Hospital,” Tony replied.

“And I know you remember Gibbs, but do you remember anyone else?” Brad asked.

Tony looked around the room; his eyes stopped on Ducky, “Ducky.” They shifted to Palmer, “Gremlin.”

Jimmy grinned at the nickname, “Hey Tony.”

“Gremlin?” Dr. Hale asked, confused, and a little worried that Tony’s memory was messed up.

“Tony calls me Autopsy Gremlin,” Jimmy explained with a smile, “It’s his nickname for me.”

“Ahh,” Both doctors nodded.

Tony shifted his gaze to Abby and smiled, “LMPT.”

Everyone in the room, with the exception of Gibbs, looked at Tony in confusion.

“LMPT?” Palmer repeated.

Tony grinned at Abby, “La Mia Principessa delle Tenebre.” _(My Princess of the Dark)_

Vitalia giggled when she heard that. She liked it. She thought Abby liked black because she had a lot of it; like how she liked pink because she had a lot of it. She liked how pretty it was.

Abby’s bottom lip trembled and tears filled her eyes. She hadn’t realized how much she had missed hearing that until just now. “Tone.”

Tony smiled at her before turning to the next in line. He was still shocked to see the man, “Director.”

Vance nodded in response, “DiNozzo.”

“I know you remember me,” Jackson smiled.

Tony chuckled, but stopped when it made him cough.

“Easy,” Dr. Hale warned as he helped him sip a little water, “your lungs are still healing.”

“S-sorry,” Tony replied as he drank the water, sighing at the cool relief on his throat. He looked over at the girl in Gibbs’ arms, “Is she ok?”

“She’s fine,” Gibbs nodded, “you protected her.”

“And her mom?” Tony asked, but deep down, he already knew the answer.

“Didn’t make it,” Gibbs told him, “when I got there, she was already gone.”

Tony’s eyes closed briefly.

“Hey,” Gibbs called, making Tony open his eyes, “It’s not your fault. She fought, and so did you, but her injuries were too much. If it wasn’t for you, this little girl wouldn’t be here.”

Tony nodded. He smiled at the girl, “What’s her name?”

“Vitalia,” Abby answered with a grin.

Tony smiled at the girl, “My name is Tony, Pretty Girl.”

Vitalia giggled and reached out to touch Tony’s arm, “Hi Tony. I stay with you now.”

Tony’s brows furrowed at her words, but before he could say anything, Gibbs spoke up.

“I’ll explain later,” the older man said.

Tony nodded and then turned back to the two doctors. He opened his mouth to ask about his injuries, but a yawn escaped instead and he blinked his eyes as he tried to fight the sleep.

“Tired?” Brad asked, looking at Tony.

“No,” Tony shook his head even as he settled further down on the bed into a more comfortable position.

“It’s ok Tony,” Brad assured him, “Even though you’ve been unconscious for a few days, right now, your body just wants a natural sleep, so go ahead.”

Tony fought against the doctor’s words, not wanting to close his eyes. He needed to talk to Gibbs, to explain and figure out what happened.

Knowing his agent, Gibbs leaned forward, “It’s ok Tony. Rest. I’ve got your six.”

At his words, Tony allowed his eyes to close down and he gave in to the sleep pulling at his body.

The occupants of the room watched him with smiles.

“How long do you think he’s gonna be asleep?” Jackson asked.

“It depends,” Dr. Hale responded, “it could be an hour, or more than a few.”

“We’ll check back in later,” Brad said as he moved towards the door.

“Thanks doc,” Gibbs nodded. He watched the two men leave before turning his gaze back to Tony. _‘You’re back with us Tony. And when you’re better, things will change. It was too close this time. I almost lost you. We almost missed our chance. When you get stronger, that’s gonna change.’_

Satisfied, Gibbs settled back into the chair.

“LJ?” Vitalia shifted so that she could see him.

Gibbs’ lips twitched at the nickname. Just a day or two ago, he had told her to call him ‘LJ’ as opposed to her calling him ‘Gibbs’ or ‘Jethro’ or ‘Leroy’. “Yes?”

 “Tony’s ok now,” Vitalia said, “The angels didn’t take him.”

“No they didn’t,” Gibbs smiled at her, “he’s yours, remember? They left him for you, so they didn’t take him.”

Vitalia nodded, “Good. I’m glad. Does mommy miss me?”

Gibbs shifted Vitalia until she was kneeling in his lap, “listen to me; your mommy loved you very much and she didn’t want to leave you. She misses you a lot, but, she knows the angels left Tony to take care of you, so she’s ok.”

“You take care of me too?” Vitalia asked. She wanted to be with Tony, but she felt safe around him too.

“We all will,” Gibbs nodded to everyone in the room and Vitalia looked around at the others, smiling when she saw they were smiling too.

“We’re a family,” Gibbs continued, “we take care of each other and we don’t let anyone hurt our family.”

“Family,” Vitalia repeated softly, the smile still on her face. “I family too.”

“Yes you are,” Gibbs nodded and he lightly pressed a finger to her sides, grinning when he heard the giggle that escaped her lips.

“Did I just here a giggle?” Abby got up slowly and made her way over to the two of them.

“No!” Vitalia giggled as she pushed back into Gibbs away from Abby.

“I think you did,” Palmer grinned.

“Nuh uh,” Vitalia shook her head.

“Uh huh,” Abby grinned and pounced; soon, the room was filled with the sound of Vitalia’s laughter.

Some of the nurses and doctors passing by, smiled to themselves when they heard it.

Later that afternoon, after everyone had left to go home to eat and shower and basically take a break from being in the hospital, everyone was sitting around Tony’s room talking to him. He had woken up just ten minutes ago.

The door opened, stopping their conversations, and they all looked to see Brad and Dr. Hale walking into the room.

“Alright doc,” Tony spoke, “Give it to me. How bad is it?”

Brad chuckled and without preamble, he listed the injuries, making Tony wince at each offense.

“So how long will I be in the hospital for?” Tony asked when the man was done.

“Well,” Dr. Hale picked up, “to be honest, just a day or two more, just to be on the safe side, and then, you’ll be released.”

“And how soon will I be able to go back to work?” Tony asked, already dreading the answer.

“With your ribs and your right wrist,” Brad said, “you’ll be off work for about two weeks, and as for when you’ll be able to go back in the field, I’ll leave that up to your boss.”

“Don’t do that,” Tony turned wide eyes on the doctor, “give me a timeline; a week, two weeks, anything. Don’t leave it like that.”

The others laughed at Tony’s words.

“Sorry Tony,” Brad grinned, amused by the man’s antics.

Tony groaned. He really hated being on bed rest and he knew that Gibbs would follow the doctors’ instructions to the tee and it would be a while before he was off of desk duty and back in the field.

Gibbs chuckled as he read the look on Tony’s face. The Italian was predictable when it came to having to be off work due to an injury.

“With the pain medications,” Dr. Hale continued, “you can’t be on your own.”

“He’ll stay with me,” Gibbs interrupted.

Vance stared at the man in shock, though he should’ve known better. Everyone knew Gibbs held a soft spot for Ms. Sciuto, but from what he knew of the team, there was only one person Gibbs had ever allowed to stay in his house when they were injured or just needed a place to stay and that was DiNozzo.

Tony’s eyes flew to him in shock. “That’s ok boss.”

“DiNozzo,” Gibbs cut him off, “you’re staying.” His tone was firm and final.

“Right, got it boss,” Tony nodded. He should’ve known better than to try and argue against the man.

“Instructions,” Dr. Hale continued, “Agent DiNozzo, because your ribs are still healing, you can’t put too much pressure on them; no heavy lifting, no doing anything that would put a strain on your ribs; your shoulders—both of them—should be used carefully, so again, no heavy lifting and your wrist, the cast is not to get wet and it should be kept immobile as much as you can.”

“So basically I’m on bed rest,” Tony groaned.

“Pretty much,” Brad chuckled, “but considering the alternative, bed rest is the better end of the deal, isn’t it?”

Tony mock glared at his doctor, “No logic.”

Brad laughed, as did the others, before he made his way to the door, Dr. Hale in tow. “Take it easy Tony. I’ll be back to check on you later.”

“Thanks Brad,” Tony nodded to the doctor.

“No problem,” Brad said and he left the room, closing the door behind him and Dr. Hale.

Tony’s head fell back against the pillow.

“Man Tony,” Jimmy grinned, “you can’t do anything.”

Tony groaned, “Shut up Jimmy.” With a sigh, he lifted his head and looked around, brows furrowing when he didn’t see who he was looking for.

“What is it Anthony?” Ducky asked, seeing the look.

“Where’re Ziva and McGee?” Tony asked, not seeing his two teammates.

At his question, Gibbs’ eyes darkened, Ducky and Jackson frowned, Palmer looked away, Abby scoffed and Vance folded his arms across his chest.

“What is it?” Tony asked, when he saw the reactions.

“They’re not here,” Gibbs answered gruffly.

Tony remembered the man’s taunting words when they had been fighting and instantly feared the worst, “Are they-are they ok? They’re not hurt, are they? They’re fine, right?”

Gibbs mentally cursed at Tony’s question and felt a renewed anger towards his former agents. And he wasn’t the only one.

All of them were shocked that Tony would ask and at the memory of what the two had done, they were just as angry.

Vance especially, was shocked that Tony was asking about the two, considering what they had done, but then, the shocked gave way as logic sounded. Tony had no idea what the two had done, but he knew that the man couldn’t be told the truth, not until he was stronger, “Agents McGee and David are fine.”

Tony looked at Gibbs for confirmation. Not that he didn’t trust or believe Vance, but he just needed the reassurance.

“He’s right,” Gibbs nodded, “both of them are fine.”

Tony frowned, “then where are they?” he was surprised that the two weren’t here as he’d expected them to be.

“Do you remember what happened Tony?” Abby asked.

“Yeah,” Tony nodded.

“Are you up for telling us?” Gibbs asked, not wanting to push Tony.

Tony closed his eyes as his mind pulled the memories to the forefront. Taking a deep breath, he reopened his eyes and then nodded.

“Ok,” Gibbs nodded, “Start with when you got to the neighbourhood.”

“We had to decide who would actually go door to door and I volunteered to do it,” Tony started.

“Why?” Vance asked.

“Ziva, as talented as she is, has limited people skills,” Tony replied with a small grin, “because of the nature of what we were doing, I didn’t think Ziva would’ve had the patience to do the job properly, and McGee, well, he may be a whiz on computers, but he’s just as bad as Ziva when it comes to interacting with others. I’ve been undercover more than enough times, so I knew how to get what we wanted, even if it was just to get voice recognition.”

Vance nodded, “Continue.”

“I went from door to door, met a lot of interesting people,” Tony continued, “got one or two doors slammed in face, but all in all, despite the fact that it was pretty much a gated community, the people were surprisingly open.”

“What happened next?” Gibbs asked.

“I knew how boring stakeouts could get,” Tony said, “So I kept talking, about anything and everything; I figured if I talked, Ziva and McGee wouldn’t be bored and it would take their minds off of just sitting in the car doing nothing.”

The others exchanged looks at Tony’s confession; to think, he had been talking to his teammates, not to be a chatterbox, but to keep their minds occupied and they had turned off the radio because they didn’t want to hear him.

“What’s with the look?” Tony looked from person to person, wondering if he was missing something.

“Nothing,” Gibbs said, “what happened after that?”

“Well, I was heading back to the car,” Tony’s brows pulled together, “but I stopped.”

“Why?” Jackson asked. When he had been told what had happened he had been angry and disgusted, but right now, he was hurting for Tony because he knew once the young man found out what happened on the side of his teammates, it would hurt him. That kind of betrayal would be hard to get over.

“My mother,” Tony replied, to the shock of the room.

“What?” Jimmy broke the silence.

“I don’t understand,” Abby said, “Tony, your mom is—

“Dead, I know,” Tony smiled at her, “it wasn’t her per se, but it was more like her scent.”

“What do you mean Anthony?” Ducky asked.

“Lilacs were my mother’s favourite flowers,” Tony told them, “I remember as I kid, every time I was near her, I would always smell lilacs. The last time I smelled lilacs, was the day the SWAK letter arrived at the bullpen.”

Gasps echoed throughout the room from everyone except Gibbs; he was just staring at Tony with unreadable eyes, but his whole body had tensed.

“That’s why you grabbed the letter from McGee,” Abby whispered, though they all heard her.

“Yeah,” Tony nodded, as the memory rushed back to him, “Anyways, when I smelt the lilacs, I got a really bad feeling. I looked around, but I didn’t see anything that signified danger or anything, so I brushed it off and continued to the car. I’d only taken maybe a couple more steps, when I smelt the flowers again and the bad feeling increased.

“I turned around and I looked at all the houses. When I stopped at 673, the bad feeling became even stronger and it was like I was covered in the lilac scent. I radioed in to McGee and Ziva to let them know where I’d be and I headed to the house. Vitalia opened the door and I asked her to get her parents and then, her father came to the door. I barely introduced myself before he slammed it in my face. Next thing I knew, I heard a woman cry out and a crash, so I drew my gun and kicked in the door. When I got in, I identified myself as an NCIS agent.

“I could hear him beating her and I saw the blood trail so I followed it to the living room. I saw the guy standing over his wife and Vitalia was hiding. I told him who I was and to step away from the woman. He ignored me. He was about to hit her again, but I dropped my gun and I tackled him.”

“You did what?” Vance interrupted. “DiNozzo, dropping your gun was the one thing you should _not_ have done.”

Tony stared at the director with narrowed eyes, “Well excuse me director, but getting him away from her was my first and only priority. Did I know that discarding my weapon was against protocol? Yes, but honestly, I wasn’t thinking about protocol just then. And I couldn’t shoot him because there was a chance I could’ve missed and hit either the woman or Vitalia. I’ve been a cop for over ten years, and I don’t need you telling me what I should and shouldn’t have done. Sometimes, you just got to go with your instincts. I was caught up in the moment and I reacted.”

Gibbs glared at Vance before turning back to his SFA, “Focus DiNozzo. What happened next?”

“We fought,” Tony looked at his boss. “I remember him taunting me about McGee and Ziva, saying that he had had them taken care of, because when I called out to them for backup, they didn’t answer. He went after Vitalia, and I couldn’t let him hurt her. We fought some more until I was able to knock him out. Then I called you. The last thing I remember is seeing you come in the room.”

He didn’t say anything about what he had seen when he had been unconscious. It’s not that he thought they’d be weird, but he felt uncomfortable saying anything; what had happened in his coma-like state felt too intimate for him to share with all of them. Sensing eyes on him, he looked up and saw Gibbs staring. He could tell that Gibbs knew he was holding something back, but he was thankful that the older man said nothing.

Gibbs could read Tony better than anyone, even Abby, so he knew Tony was not telling them everything. But he didn’t say anything because he had his own issues; like the promise he had made when Tony had still been unconscious and just how he was going to tell Tony what Ziva and McGee did. He looked up at the others and saw they were just as perplexed as he was.

Tony saw the looks, “Ok, that’s the second time you guys have exchanged looks. What is going on?”

“Tony,” Abby started, but stopped and bit her lip. She had no idea how to even begin to tell him.

“What is it?” Tony asked, “Just tell me. I mean, you said they weren’t injured or anything, right?  So then, tell me. Why aren’t they here?”

“I banned them from your room,” Gibbs answered.

“Why?” Tony asked.

“Because none of us wants them here,” Jimmy answered, “Not after what they did.”

“What did they do?” Tony asked.

“Maybe we should leave this off for another time?” Ducky suggested. He could see that Tony was getting agitated and he really didn’t want the young man to put any more unnecessary stress on his body, not when it was still healing.

“No!” Tony shook his head, “I need to know. Tell me; what did Ziva and McGee do?”

For the first time since they met, Vance felt pure sympathy for the agent lying in the bed. He knew how close this team was and how they considered each other family. He knew of how much DiNozzo cared about his teammates and how he more often than not, went out of his way to cheer them up if they were in a bad mood, and he knew that he found out the truth about their betrayal, it would break him.

And as he looked around the other people in the room, he knew he had to leave. He and DiNozzo still had their issues. He wasn’t a part of this core, so he couldn’t be here. He couldn’t watch one of the strongest person he knew break. With that thought in mind, he slowly—and without drawing attention—left the room. As he made to leave, he threw one last glance through the window; he knew that _they_ were DiNozzo’s family and he would need them. They would help him get past the betrayal of two people he had trusted.

Back inside, Tony still stared at Gibbs. He was vaguely aware of Vance leaving, but he didn’t focus on it. “Just tell me.”

“They left you without backup,” Gibbs answered after a short silence.

Tony thought he heard wrong. _‘I had to have. There’s no way Gibbs just said what I think he did.’_ “What?”

Abby spoke up, “It’s true Tony. They never came to your rescue because they never heard your calls.”

“Maybe the radio malfunctioned or something,” Tony stammered out.

“It didn’t,” Abby shook her head, “I checked and rechecked it. The radio was working fine. They never answered because they turned off the radio. They left you alone Tony.”

Tony felt his heart freeze. What Abby was saying, what she was trying to tell him, no…it couldn’t be true. “You’re lying.” His voice was raspy with his emotions.

“She’s not,” Gibbs countered, “While you were fighting for not only your life, but Vitalia and her mom’s, the two of them were sitting in the car with no idea what was going on because they had turned off the communication between you and them.”

“Why?” Tony felt his head spinning. It was clear that none of them wanted to tell him, but he needed to know. “TELL ME!”

Gibbs repeated what Ziva and McGee had confessed.

Tony was struck silent. His teammates, the people he had relied on to have his six, had left him alone in a dangerous situation because they had been tired of hearing him talk?! He trusted them.

“I was-I was fighting and they were-were doing nothing because they cut me off,” Tony repeated, his breathing started picking up speed.

Ducky watched his heart monitor, “Anthony, you need to calm down.”

“Calm down? How can I calm down?” Tony clenched his hand into a fist. He couldn’t believe it. “They left me. I trusted them…I needed them and they left me. I could’ve died. And all because they wanted to play a prank? All because they wanted peace and quiet?”

As the words sank into his mind, the pain and betrayal from two people he had considered friends, the people he had considered family and who he had trusted with his life, crashed into him. His breathing became even more irregular and his monitors started going haywire. Within seconds, an alarm went off and nurses were rushing into his room.

“You need to leave!” A nurse yelled at the group as the rest tried to get Tony’s BP under control.

“Get Dr. Pitt!” another nurse ordered.

Gibbs and the others were pushed from the room just as Brad and Dr. Hale ran past them.

“Oh God,” Abby sobbed as she fell back against the wall.

Vitalia was staring at Tony’s room with wide eyes. She turned to look at Gibbs. “What’s wrong?”

Gibbs stared at the little girl, wondering how he could explain what was going on; how could he tell her Tony’s mind couldn’t deal with the betrayal of two people he trusted and so he was shutting down?

“I don’t know,” he replied eventually. _‘God Shannon…I can’t lose him. I love him. Don’t take him away.’_

**_‘Wouldn’t dream of it Gunny.’_ **

Gibbs thought he was going crazy. _‘I think worrying about Tony is stressing me out.’_

Soft laughter echoed in his mind, causing Gibbs to shake his head. Tony being in the hospital was really stressing him out; he needed to get better. This was the second time he thought he heard Shannon’s voice.

~…~

Hours later, Gibbs was sitting in Tony’s room by himself. After the doctors and nurses had been able to get Tony’s blood pressure down and his heart monitor stable, Brad had told them that Tony had been given a sedative and that he would be knocked for a few hours, so Gibbs had suggested that the others go home and get some rest.

Of course, Abby put up a fight, but Jackson had been able to change her mind; to no one’s surprise though, she had promised to be back early morning, and so had Ducky and Palmer.

A sigh drew his attention and his gaze turned to rest on the figure sleeping on the cot across the room. Vitalia had refused to leave, not even with Abby and they knew how much she liked her.

Gibbs had had another motive for wanting everyone to leave. He needed some time alone with Tony. He had a promise to keep after all and he still had to explain Vitalia to his second in command.

There was a part that whispered that Tony might not feel the same way he did; he told that part to shut up. He’s always trusted his gut, but he couldn’t use his gut in this situation. Instead, he was using something he hadn’t used in a long time; his heart. His heart was telling him that Tony returned his feelings and he listened.

Tony was his and he planned on letting the Italian know just that. He just needed him to wake up now so he could tell him.

_(Dream)_

**_“You just love doing things the hard way, don’t you?”_ **

**_Tony whirled around and saw Shannon grinning at him._ **

**_“I swear, you and Jethro are so much alike, but somehow, you still come off as the more stubborn one,” Shannon laughed._ **

**_“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Tony grinned at her. “So what’s going on? Did I relapse or something? Are you here to lead me to the Great Beyond?”_ **

**_Shannon laughed, “Oh yes. You are just perfect.” She walked over to him and cupped his cheek, “You have been through a lot, haven’t you?”_ **

**_Tony closed his eyes as the memory of his two friends—no, former friends—betrayal. “I don’t understand. Why would they do that?”_ **

**_“I don’t know,” Shannon bit her lip, “but what I do is you’re not going to get your answers being here.”_ **

**_“Are you sure he loves me?” Tony asked, looking so much like a lost little boy that Shannon’s heart ached and she wished his father was standing in front of her._ **

**_“I’m dead Tony,” Shannon smiled, “but even when I was still alive, I knew Gunny better than anyone. You are the first person to come close to knowing him as good as I did. He loves you just as much as he loved me. He’s just waiting for you.”_ **

**_“I never thought,” Tony began._ **

**_“I know,” Shannon nodded, “but you have the chance now. You just have to be_ ** _there **and not here. Let him know how you feel. The two of you can make each other very happy and Gunny being happy is all I’ve ever wanted for him and I know you can make that happen. Just tell him.”**_

**_Tony stared at the redhead for a few seconds before he smiled and stepped close, pressing a kiss to her cheek, “I can see why he fell for you. You are one of a kind Shannon.”_ **

**_Shannon giggled, “Such a sweet talker.”_ **

**_Tony laughed and stepped back._ **

**_“Oh and Tony?” her eyes sparkled mischievously._ **

**_“Yeah?” he turned to her._ **

**_Shannon grabbed his arm and grinned, “Gunny may be not be a young man anymore, but that doesn’t mean his libido has dimmed.”_ **

**_Tony’s eyes went wide with shock._ **

**_“Have fun,” Shannon grinned before she pushed him._ **

**_Tony stumbled backwards and fell and as a white light surrounded him, the last thing he heard was Shannon’s laughter._ **

_(End Dream)_

Gibbs had just started nodding off when he heard the groan. He looked up and saw Tony shifting in his bed. He leaned closer.

 “Crazy redhead.”

At the mumble, Gibbs’ blue eyes narrowed in confusion. “Tony?”

Tony heard his name and after a few more minutes of shifting and blinking, he opened his eyes and saw Gibbs. His mind still groggy, he didn’t even stop to think about what he was about to say, “Hey boss. Your wife is one naughty woman.”

Gibbs leaned back in shock. What? “What was that?”

Tony came fully awake at the question and he stared at Gibbs. His mind ran back over the last few minutes and he groaned. “Nothing boss.” He looked around, noticing how dark out it was and that they were alone. “Where is everyone?”

“They went home hours ago,” Gibbs told him. “How are you feeling?”

“Tired,” Tony replied.

Gibbs nodded, “the sedative. It’ll wear off in a few minutes.”

Tony lied on the bed, allowing himself time to get his bearings. He could feel himself wake up even more and as he did, Shannon’s words came back to him. She had encouraged him to tell Gibbs how he felt, but he was scared; to open up himself like that to someone…it was terrifying.

Gibbs watched as the emotions played across Tony’s face and wondered what was going through his mind. He had to talk to Tony, but first, there was something that was bugging him, “Tony?”

Tony shifted his head to look at the older man, “Yeah boss.”

“Just now when you woke up,” Gibbs said, “you made a comment; something about crazy redheads and how my wife was naughty.”

Tony’s eyes went wide and his cheeks went pink. He cleared his throat, “Oh, you heard that.”

Gibbs nodded.

“It was nothing,” Tony tried to play it off, “just me mumbling and say—

“DiNozzo,” the name came out firm and tinged with a command.

“Right,” Tony nodded and took a deep breath, “this may sound crazy and you might not believe me. Hell, I don’t believe it and it’s me it happened to.”

“Tell me,” Gibbs said.

“Ok,” Tony said, “here goes.” He told him about seeing his mother and then meeting Shannon and Kelly and he told about seeing Shannon just now. He left out though, what Shannon had told him about confessing how he felt.

Gibbs was shocked by what he heard.

“Told you, you wouldn’t believe me,” Tony grinned.

_‘Well, that explains why I keep hearing Shannon.’_ “I believe you,” Gibbs said out loud.

Tony stared at Gibbs, silently wondering if his boss was just humouring him, but dismissed the thought. He laid his head back down on the pillow and stared at the ceiling. He could remember Shannon’s words and her encouragement. Taking a deep breath, he decided to lay his heart on the line, “There was something else.”

Gibbs looked at him, blue eyes filled with curiosity, “What?”

Tony kept his gaze on the ceiling. _‘How do I do this? How do I tell him I’m in love with him? Where do I even start?’_

**_‘At the beginning.’_ **

The voice echoed in his mind and he couldn’t help but to chuckle.

“Talk to me Tony,” Gibbs implored, “tell me what you’re thinking.”

_‘Like a Band-Aid; quick and painless.’_ “I’m in love with you,” Tony said. He heard the sharp intake, but refused to take his eyes off the ceiling, “I can’t tell you when exactly I fell for you, but I did. And it scares me. And it’s not because you’re a man, that’s not the issue, the thing of it is, I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. It scares me because from the moment we met, you’ve always been able to see through the act and see me, the real me, and no one had ever done that before. The more time I spent around you, the more you pushed through the haze surrounding me, the closer you got to me.

“Sooner than I thought, you became important to me. All I wanted was to please you, to make you proud of me. You became a constant fixture in my life and for the first time, I had someone I could actually depend on, someone who actually wanted me around. At first, I couldn’t believe it, so in a way, I decided to test you.”

Gibbs nodded, “that’s why you acted the way you did those first few days.”

Tony chuckled, it didn’t surprise him that Gibbs had figured him out, “Yeah. I had thought that there was no way you really wanted me around. So, I pushed your buttons and got on your nerves, but you didn’t get rid of me. You still wanted me around and that threw me. I couldn’t understand why you would want me around, _me,_ the worthless screw-up that never outgrew his frat boy antics. But you did. And slowly but surely, I started relaxing around you; more of the real Tony DiNozzo came out.

“When I first realized how I felt about you, I denied it. Out of all the men, why did I fall for you? I mean, you were Gibbs; my hard-ass, stubborn, bastard of a boss with three ex-wives. I denied and denied, even went with women, dated a few guys too, but I had to accept the truth; I was in love with you. After accepting that truth, I had to face another one; you would never feel the same for me. As far as I knew, you were straight, and even if you weren’t, I was sure you could’ve done better than me. I decided to keep my feelings to myself and I hoped you’d never find out because honestly, while I knew you wouldn’t shun me or anything, I was terrified of what it would do to our friendship.”

“Tony,” the low self-esteem in Tony’s voice stirred Gibbs’ protectiveness and it had him wanting to hunt down Senior. He knew Tony had issues, but he hadn’t realized just how deeply they ran and how much they still affected him.

“Let me finish Gibbs, or I’ll never get this out,” Tony pleaded.

“Ok,” Gibbs nodded, “Go on.”

“I don’t want you to hate me, and I don’t want our relationship to change,” Tony continued, “I know you don’t feel the same, and I’m willing to put this behind us and get on with our lives.”

“I don’t want to put this behind us,” Gibbs spoke up.

“What?” Tony finally turned to look at Gibbs.

_‘Now or never,’_ Gibbs thought. “Tony, I could never hate you for being honest about how you feel.” He leaned forward and reached out to grab Tony’s arm. “You were wrong about me not feeling the same. I love you Tony.”

“What?” this was not what he expected.

Gibbs chuckled, seeing the stunned look on the younger man’s face. “I said I love you.”

“You do?” Tony questioned, hope building in his eyes.

“I do,” Gibbs nodded.

“Why?” Tony asked, needing to know and understand.

“For the same reasons you love me,” Gibbs said, “I’m a bastard, you know that and you don’t care. Somehow, you got past all the pain and anger and you broke through the wall that I had built around my heart after I lost Shannon. I’ve had issues with other relationships because they all told me that I couldn’t let go of Shannon and they were tired of competing with a dead woman.”

“She was your first wife Gibbs, your first love,” Tony interrupted. He smiled as he remembered the redhead, “She was a big part of your past. I know Shannon has your heart, all I’d want is to know that I’m in there as well.”

“And that’s why I love you,” Gibbs smiled, “You accept that I love Shannon. What I feel for you, it scared me too. After losing Shannon, I never thought I’d feel this way about anyone and then you came along. You being a man played a part in my denial, but I wasn’t ready to let go of Shannon yet, so I buried how I felt about you. And then this happened and I realized that I was wasting time hiding my feelings. You almost died and all I can think of is how we almost missed our chance. I’m tired of hiding how I feel about you Tony. We’ve had too many close calls and I don’t want to regret not taking this chance.”

“So what are you saying?” Tony cleared his throat. He had never heard Gibbs say this much…ever.

“Do I really gotta spell it out for you DiNozzo?” Gibbs raised an eyebrow, his blue eyes flashing playfully.

Tony grinned, “What? I want to hear the words mister.”

Gibbs rolled his eyes, but didn’t stop the smile, “I want us to be together. I want you to live with me, to make my house a home, for the three of us to be a family.”

“Three of us?” Tony questioned.

Gibbs nodded towards the sleeping Vitalia. “She’s yours. You have custody of her.”

“What?” Tony looked at the little girl in shock.

“Can explain all that later,” Gibbs said, “right now, I’m still waiting on an answer.”

“Oh,” Tony’s cheeks flushed. “I want the same thing you do G-Jethro. I want to be with you, but are you sure about the living together part? I mean, shouldn’t we date first?”

“Tony,” Gibbs grinned, “I’d say the entire time we’ve known each other we’ve been dating. We just didn’t realize it.”

Tony laughed for a few minutes before it died down and a shy smile toyed on his lips, “So, you really mean it, huh? You really want to give us a try?”

“I do,” Gibbs nodded.

Tony closed his eyes briefly and reopened them, before admitting a fear he held, “I’m scared you’ll see what everyone else does and you’ll leave me too.”

“That won’t happen,” Gibbs squeezed his arm, “I know you Tony. I know who you are underneath all the flirting and acting like an irresponsible goof and I love you. Even if I didn’t love you, I still would want you in my life.”

“I’ve never been enough for anyone, and I’ve never felt like I measured up,” Tony said softly, his green eyes shimmering with unshed tears, “but you’re telling me that I’m enough for you.”

“Because you are,” Gibbs said gently, but firmly.

Tony bit his lip, “Ok.  It’s gonna take a while for me to believe it because I have a lot of issues.”

“I know,” Gibbs nodded. And he did; he knew how insecure Tony was and he would spend the rest of his life making sure the man never doubted his worth or his place in his life.

“And just you know,” Tony grinned suddenly, “I want a real date. Not one where we sit around your basement drinking bourbon and eating steak. No, I want to dress up and go out, the whole nine yards.”

Gibbs shook his head as he listened to the man ramble on about their future date. He must really love him if he couldn’t even muster up any objections to what Tony was saying. A sudden thought hit him and he couldn’t help but to chuckle.

“What’s so funny?” Tony cut his plan-making short at the sound.

Gibbs grinned and his blue eyes flashed with amusement, “Nothing, nothing, except, I just realized the difference between this relationship and my previous ones is the fact that you’re a man; you’re just as high maintenance as a woman, if not more.”

“Hey!”

The indignant look on the Italian’s face had Gibbs laughing.

“See if I give you any,” Tony grumbled, though inside he was pleased.

“Already using sex as a bargaining chip,” Gibbs chuckled. Seeing he was still pouting, he leaned over and kissed him. “I love you.”

Tony practically melted and then groaned, “it’s gonna be really hard to stay mad at you, isn’t it?”

Gibbs shrugged as he leaned back in his chair. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Uh huh,” Tony said as he snuggled down into the bed. A yawn escaped and shifted even more to get comfortable.

“Go to sleep,” Gibbs ordered softly, “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Hmmk,” Tony mumbled as he closed his eyes.

As Gibbs watched him sleep, his thoughts drifted off to his first wife. “Thanks for taking care of him Shan.”

**_‘Be happy with him.’_ **

 He already planned to.


	6. Accountability

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** NCIS and all its affiliates belong to its creators Donald P. Bellisario and Don McGill, and CBS Television. No trademark or copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made from this. In other words, I DO NOT own.
> 
> “Speaking”  
>  _‘Thinking’  
>  “Speaking over the phone”_

 

* * *

  
_It is not only what we do, but what we do not do for which we are accountable—_ Molière

* * *

Ziva sat in her car as she watched the NCIS building; she hadn’t been back since the Director had ordered her and McGee off the premises almost three weeks ago. The last two weeks had been spent at the NCIS training academy; Vance had ordered both her and McGee to report there, stating that they needed to learn how to work as a team and what it meant to have your teammates’ back.

They had had to sit through seminars on working together, retake their firearms evaluations, have psychological evaluations, and what had made everything worse was that everyone at the training centre knew what they had done, what _she_ had done and the two of them had been treated with contempt. No one wanted to be near them and that had hurt.

And the worst thing was, she had no idea how Tony was doing. She didn’t know if he had woken up or if he was still in the coma. A week after Tony had been admitted, she had tried, against Gibbs’ orders, to go to the hospital, hoping to see him without the others being there, but had found she couldn’t. She hadn’t even been able to get past the nurses’ desk. The moment she had told them who she was, they had told her that she wasn’t allowed to see him due to a request made by Gibbs.

That had stung. Dejected, she had turned and left and hadn’t tried to go back again. And even now, almost two weeks she had first tried, she still didn’t know anything.

A car honking brought her out of her thoughts with a jump and she looked up to see that it was just a car in the parking lot across from the building.

Sighing, she got out and headed inside. She got on the elevator, ignoring the dark looks from the agents, and guards in the lobby, and pressed the number to the bullpen. Her hands clenched and unclenched the entire time as she knew her presence would not be welcomed.

When the doors open, she kept her head bowed as she stepped off the elevator into the bullpen.

She could hear the whispers start up as everyone saw her and she felt their stares but she ignored them.

“What is _she_ doing here?”

“Oh didn’t you hear? She has that interview with IA today. She was to explain why she left her partner without back-up and why he’s in the hospital and a woman is dead because of it.”

“Do you think she’ll get her job back?”

Ziva didn’t hear the response as she had turned down the hallway to the interrogation room where her interview would be. When she got there, she saw that IA was already waiting for her.

“Ms. David,” one of the men said, “My name is Tony Rogers and this is Steve Williams.”

“Gentlemen,” Ziva nodded as she took the seat they offered.

“Now,” Rogers spoke, “you know why you’re here. We need to understand exactly what happened on the day in question.”

“Explain to us exactly what you, Agent DiNozzo and Agent McGee were doing that day,” Williams said.

Ziva shifted in her seat, “We were canvassing a neighbourhood, trying to find a voice print match to find the terrorist from the radio. Agent DiNozzo had chosen to be the one to go door to door, while I and Agent McGee remained in the car.”

Rogers looked up from his notes, “What happened at that point?”

At the question, Ziva found she couldn’t hold the man’s gaze as the memories of that day flew across her mind.

“Ms. David?” Rogers prompted, his gaze impassive.

“Agent DiNozzo was going door to door in an effort to match a voice to the recording that we had had at the time,” Ziva refocused and explained, “During his reconnaissance, he kept up a running commentary about trivial things and Agent McGee and myself soon became irritated and then we,” she stopped.

“You what?” Williams said, impatience colouring his voice, “You did what Ms. David?”

“We turned the radio off,” Ziva finished.

“Why?” Williams asked. He had to fight to keep his professionalism. He had already known what she had done, but to hear it again, it still sent anger rolling through him. Such a blatant disregard for not only their partner’s safety, but for the agency’s rules as well.

“We were tired of hearing him speak,” Ziva told them, shame filling her.

Rogers looked at her, “So, let me see if I get this straight; while you and your partners were on a mission to find a terrorist, you decided to cut all communications because you were tired of hearing him talk?”

Yes,” Ziva nodded.

The temperature in the room dropped. Rogers and Williams exchanged looks before giving Ziva a harsh stare.

“Whose idea was it to turn off the radio?” Williams asked.

“I turned it off,” Ziva admitted.

“Did Agent McGee do anything when he saw that you had turned off the radio?” Rogers asked.

“He leaned his head back against the headrest and said ‘Thank God’,” Ziva said.

“How long was the radio off for?” Rogers asked.

“I do not know,” Ziva shook her head, “I suspect around three hours.”

Rogers and Williams exchanged another look, but neither commented on her statement.

“Then what happened?” Williams asked.

“We became curious as to why Agent DiNozzo was taking so long to return and I suggested we turn the radio back on, but Agent McGee asked if I wanted to subject myself to more of Agent DiNozzo’s rambling, considering we had enough of it at the office. I said no, and remarked that it had been peaceful, and so, the radio remained off.

“After a while, we became even more concerned when Agent DiNozzo did not return. We turned the radio back on and tried contacting Agent DiNozzo, but we received no answer.”

Ziva paused as it hit her that about that time, Tony had not even been conscious. She swallowed heavily and continued, “We then decided to go after him. Just as we were about to leave, we noticed our boss-Agent Gibbs’ car drive by us and we realized something was wrong, so we followed him. When we came upon the house, we found Agent Gibbs kneeling next to Agent DiNozzo who was unconscious.

“Agent Gibbs ordered us to secure the scene and transfer the suspect back to base and he took Agent DiNozzo to the hospital. Agent McGee and I did as we were told. When the LEOs arrived, we explained what we knew, allowed their own M.E. to take the body of the victim and we brought Morrison back here to NCIS per Agent Gibbs’ orders.”

The two IA agents stared at Ziva for a few minutes before turning slightly to face each other and spoke in low tones, too low for Ziva to pick up.

As the two agents continued to talk, Ziva felt herself becoming agitated. She shifted slightly in her seat, trying to curb the restlessness and anxiousness that moved through her.

After what seemed like hours to Ziva, both men turned back to her. The look on their faces had dread running through her.

“Ms. David,” Williams spoke up, his voice cold, “your actions were not only unethical, but they went against everything this agency has taught you. You deliberately chose to close all communications to you partner, _knowing_ that he was searching for a terrorist, and not once, did you stop and think, ‘Am I doing the right thing? This was not what I was taught’. And the result, a woman is dead, a child is orphaned and an agent is lying in a hospital bed.”

Ziva tried to keep her stare up, she really did, it’s what she was taught after all, to never show fear or weakness, but this, _this_ was her family and she had betrayed them and _that_ was something she couldn’t face. So, she dropped her eyes to the table.

“Do you even think about the consequences of your actions?” Rogers demanded, “People’s lives ended up in jeopardy because of you!”

Ziva flinched at the man’s words. She could feel the hurt and sorrow, but her training kicked in and she pushed it away. Yes, she made a mistake and she regretted it, but yelling at her wasn’t going to change anything. “I do understand my actions and the result of said actions. I am…very sorry about what happened, but it was a mistake.”

“A mistake?” Williams cut her off, “What you did was not a mistake. You were searching for a terrorist and when your partner was doing _his_ job, you decided to sever all communications, a decision that you admitted doing because you were tired of hearing him talk. That was _not_ a mistake. It was deliberately done. Do you even _like_ your partner? Do you even care about him?”

“Of course I do!” Ziva snapped out, anger filling her. “I care about Tony and I never wanted him to get hurt!”

“Well you have a funny way of showing you care,” Rogers glared at her. He glanced down at the folder in front of him, “I have reports from other agents and from I gather, this is not the first time Agent DiNozzo had to suffer because of you.”

Ziva shot out of her seat, “I have never placed Tony’s life in jeopardy and how dare you insinuate otherwise?!”

“Sit down Ms. David!” Williams growled out, “NOW!”

Ziva was breathing heavily because of her anger and it was with reluctance that she did as she was told.

“He never said the suffering was physical, now did he?” Rogers stared at her, “according to reports, when Agent Gibbs was on leave, Agent DiNozzo became the leader, which given the fact that he was the Senior Field Agent and he was an NCIS agent longer than both you and Mr. McGee and as such had more experience, it was the right choice. However, neither of one of you saw it that way.” He looked down at the folder, “According to other agents, both of you displayed a disturbing lack of respect for Agent DiNozzo; incomplete case reports, ignoring orders, questioning the lead agent when orders were given.” He looked up at Ziva, “Do you need me to continue?”

Ziva had averted her eyes as the memories of Gibbs’ hiatus became prominent in her mind. At the time, she had felt so justified in her actions, but listening to them now…“No, I do not need you to continue.”

“I thought as much,” Rogers tried to hold on to his sneer.

“If it was up to us,” Williams stated, “you would be fired immediately.”

Ziva’s eyes immediately flashed towards him and when she spoke, the hope could be heard in her voice, “I still have my job?”

Williams and Rogers exchanged looks.

“I wouldn’t sound too hopeful Ms. David,” Rogers scoffed, “You have a disciplinary hearing in two days’ time where your future at NCIS will be decided by SECNAV. Until then, you are not to set foot on NCIS property.”

“You may leave,” Williams said, “And on your way out, send in Mr. McGee.”

Ziva stood up, with hope in her heart. If she could just explain everything to SECNAV, she could save her job.

When she left the room, she saw McGee leaning against the wall opposite the door.

“Hey Ziva,” McGee nodded towards her, “How’d it go?”

“Not very well,” Ziva admitted, “however, I am optimistic and will remain so until I can no longer be.”

McGee looked confused for a split second before he shook his head. “Glad to hear that Ziva.”

Ziva nodded, “you can go in.” as he passed her, she reached out and grabbed his arm, “Be strong McGee and have hope.”

McGee had no idea how he was supposed to have hope when all he felt was despair, but he didn’t say anything. He just touched her hand and then continued to the room.

“Shut the door Mr. McGee,” Williams said the moment he stepped inside, “and sit down.”

McGee gulped before doing as he was told.

“You know why you’re here,” Rogers said, getting straight to the point. Talking to Ziva had him on edge and he was torn between immediately yelling at the man in front of him and actually listening to hear his side of the story.

“Yes,” McGee nodded, trying not to show the fear he was feeling.

“Would you care to explain _your_ version of events?” Williams asked.

“When myself and Agents DiNozzo and David got to the neighbourhood,” McGee told them, “Agent DiNozzo offered to be the one that went door to door to get the voice match. As he did so, he started talking and after a while…”

McGee explained everything, his version matching up with Ziva’s. When he was done, he gulped a few times and started to fidget. Not once during his explanation, did either IA agent interrupt him. It made him nervous.

“Mr. McGee, I’m going to be honest,” Rogers spoke up, “What you and Ms. David did was nothing short of disgusting. Your partner trusted you to be his back-up, to be on the look-out for him and the both of you left him hanging. Because of your wilful act, Agent DiNozzo suffered, a child was hurt and a woman lost her life. At the very least, you both deserve to serve time in jail for your actions.”

McGee blanched at the agent’s words and he paled immediately. Even though he knew he would have to face some kind of consequence for what he had done, he hadn’t expected this. All he had thought was that he would get suspended, or God forbid fired, but not this; not the possibility of going to jail.

“I’m sorry,” McGee stammered out, “I didn’t mean for anything to happen. It was just-we were just so tired of him talking. We didn’t know that _that_ would have happened. We were wrong- _I_ was wrong. I know we shouldn’t have done that, but I don’t think we deserve to go to jail for it. It was an honest mistake.”

“That was the same thing that Ms. David said,” Williams said, “she said it was just a mistake; one anyone could’ve made. What neither of you understand is that you are Naval officers and as such, you can’t be making mistakes like that. They cost lives. Your actions call for your termination here and now.”

McGee shifted in his seat at the reprimand. The words sliced through him, bringing back the guilt that had never really left. Even now, almost three weeks later, he still couldn’t believe he had done what he did.

He had gone against his own morals, not to mention Gibbs’ own. His job was in jeopardy and the worst of it was, he had damaged his friendships with everyone, especially Tony and any thought he had had of having a relationship with Abby was gone.

He had messed up really bad and he knew the others wouldn’t be in any mood to forgive him any time soon. He should’ve known better. It was Tony after all. Abby and Ducky and Gibbs knew Tony longer than they did and were closer to him; Gibbs especially. While he knew how close Gibbs and Abby were, he knew that somehow, Tony was still closer to their boss than anyone else…including Ducky.

“Mr. McGee!” Rogers called sharply, noticing the man’s distracted gaze.

McGee jumped, “What?”

“Is this not worth your attention Mr. McGee?” Williams stared at him with narrowed eyes. “Are you so unconcerned about the consequences of your actions that you think you can just ignore everything?”

“N-no s-sir,” McGee stammered out, “Of course this is worth my attention and I am not unconcerned.”

“Mr. McGee,” Rogers said, “do you have anything to say in your defence? Other than the fact that it was a mistake that shouldn’t have happened and you thought it would be just a routine day?”

McGee opened his mouth to answer, but closed it as the words sank in. The truth is he _didn’t_ have anything else to say. Nothing he said now could erase what happened; he _had_ left Tony on his own when he knew they were supposed to be doing their jobs and that meant keeping the communications lines open.

Williams and Rogers exchanged looks at the silence. They never expected him to basically submit so quickly. David had argued her actions, but not him.

“No arguments?” Williams taunted.

“What else can I say?” McGee looked up at the two men, “We messed up. We never should’ve done what we did.”

“You’re right,” Rogers nodded, “you did mess up; the both of you and you both have to suffer the consequences for your actions. Because of what you did, your partner ended up in serious trouble, needing help and no way to get it. I know, you might think we’re repeating ourselves but it seems to be the only way to get through to you.”

McGee nodded and swallowed with some difficulty, “do we still have our jobs?”

Williams shook his head, “I’m going to tell you the same thing we told Ms. David; it is not up to us. If it was, both of you would be fired right now, no more questions or anything. But you both still have to have your disciplinary hearing and who knows who that may go. You can hope for the best, but I seriously doubt it’ll go the way you want it.”

“Until then though,” Rogers continued, “you’re still not allowed in the building or anywhere near.”

McGee nodded, “I understand. If that’s all…”

“You can leave,” Williams nodded towards the door.

McGee stood up and walked away without a backward glance. When he was outside, he stopped and leaned against the wall, taking deep breaths. That had been harder, and yet easier somehow, than he had thought it would be.

Now all that’s left was the hearing.

~…~

Three days later, McGee and Ziva found themselves standing in MTAC with Vance sitting in front of them. Upon the screen, they could see four other people; they recognized the director of the NCIS LA office and the SECNAV, but the other two, they didn’t know them.

“Sit down,” Vance ordered sharply.

McGee and Ziva shared a look before doing as they were told.

Vance stared at the two before gesturing to the screens, “These are Henrietta Lange, Director of the LA office, Clayton Jarvis, Secretary of the Navy, General of the Navy, Admiral Albert Chegwidden and Assistant Director of the Department of Homeland Security, Thomas Morrow.”

McGee gulped. Each of the four was staring at he and Ziva and he felt exposed. He couldn’t read anything on their faces and it had his heart racing as he knew his future was about to be decided once and for all.

Ziva stared at the faces in front of her and she tried not to let her fear or apprehension show. She knew what this meeting meant; after today, she would know if she was still and NCIS agent and in what capacity.

Vance turned back to Ziva and McGee, “the both of you are here before these men and woman to discuss your actions three weeks ago and the consequences of said actions. Consequences not limited to job termination or prison time.”

McGee and Ziva’s heart-rate spiked at the words. They had known that losing their jobs was a possibility, but hearing it out loud, as well as the fact that they could go to prison, left them feeling chilled.

Vance opened the folders in his hands. “I have in my hand the reports from both of you regarding the day in question as well as the reports concluded from the IA investigation, and reports from Agents Gibbs and DiNozzo, Forensic Scientist Abigail Sciuto and other agents as well.”

McGee and Ziva, while they were not surprised to hear that there reports from Gibbs and Abby and others, they were surprised to hear there was one from Tony.

They both took that to mean Tony was ok and both felt some weight ease off of them.

The SECNAV spoke up, “We’ve all read the reports, but frankly, I am still in a state of disbelief over the contents of the folder in front of me. The reason for the disbelief is because I cannot understand the fact that while the two of you, along with Agent DiNozzo, were on an assignment, an assignment that could’ve—and did—turn deadly at any moment, the both of you decided it was perfectly fine to cut all communications between you and him?”

“Yes,” McGee and Ziva nodded as one.

“Are you both out of your minds?” Morrow demanded. Before he had gotten the promotion to Homeland Security, he had been the Director, so he had been there when Tony had first started at NCIS.

He had been intrigued when they had first met because he had wanted to know who the person was that Gibbs, the most hard-ass, stubborn bastard working at NCIS since Mike Franks, had chosen to work with him—not only chosen but had practically demanded the young man work with him and leave Baltimore PD. That intrigue had soon become captivation after watching the two of them work side by side.

During his time at NCIS, he had learned that Tony DiNozzo had become well-liked by pretty much everyone he met; not only was he a charmer and charismatic, but he was very devoted and loyal and was willing to do anything for a friend, no matter what—unless it went against Gibbs, then all bets were off.

The point is, Tony was the kind of person you know that once you became a friend to him, he would stand by you and defend you. He was the last person that deserved to be treated like this. So to hear what these two had done…it angered him.

“What in God’s name possessed you to do what you did?” Morrow continued, glaring at the two.

“I would like to know the answer to that myself,” Admiral Chegwidden said.

“As would I,” Hetty nodded in agreement, “such blatant misconduct and disregard for protocol; your reasoning better be good.”

McGee swallowed. He hadn’t known what to expect when he came in here, but this wasn’t it. He had thought it was just the Director and maybe SECNAV, not everyone here and this was making things very hard; harder than he had thought they would be. Now, he had to explain his actions all over again to all of them and hope to convince them that he really was sorry and that they didn’t deserve to go to prison or lose their jobs.

“To be honest,” McGee started, “There is nothing I could say that could excuse what I did. We were supposed to be doing our jobs and that included keeping the communication lines open.”

“According to this,” Admiral Chegwidden said, “you did that because you were tired of listening to him talk. Could you explain that to me please?”

“Tony talks…a lot,” McGee explained, “it doesn’t matter if we’re out in the field or in the bullpen doing paperwork. He’s always talking and it’s almost always about movies or some other trivial stuff. When he started his running commentary, we couldn’t take it. We’d had enough of it at the office and we didn’t want to suffer through it at that time. So, we turned the radio off. We just wanted peace and quiet. I know, we never should’ve turned it off, but—

“But nothing,” Hetty interrupted, “you said it yourself Mr. McGee; there is nothing you can say now that can excuse what you did. Your partner was counting on you to be his back-up and instead, you deliberately chose to break protocol and all because you wanted peace and quiet?”

McGee ducked his head as shame and guilt rolled through him. Despite the fact that it was almost three weeks ago, and that Tony was ok, he couldn’t help it. It _was_ his fault. He should’ve known better.

“And you Ms. David,” Morrow looked at Ziva, “Do you have anything to say?”

“What we did,” Ziva started, “it was a mistake. One, I know, we should not have made. Tony was counting on us and we were doing our jobs. We messed up.”

“You didn’t just mess up Ms. David,” SECNAV interrupted harshly, “a woman lost her life, a child was caught in the crossfire and an agent ended up in the hospital fighting for his life. That was _not_ a simple mess up. Everything that happened that day could’ve been avoided if the both of you had done what you had been paid to do.”

 Hetty picked up, “You showed disrespect to not only Agent DiNozzo, but to this agency as a whole.”

“Do you even like Agent DiNozzo? Was his well-being not important in the grand scheme of things that you thought you could leave him without back-up and then try and justify _why_ you did so?” Morrow asked.

“We do care about Tony!” Ziva bristled, “How can you imply that we do not? Tony is our friend and hurting him was not something we wanted.”

“I find that very unbelievable,” Admiral Chegwidden said, “this is not the first time either of you have shown insubordination towards Agent DiNozzo.”

Both Ziva and McGee frowned at the man’s words.

“We’ve never shown insubordination to Tony,” McGee answered.

“You want to take that statement back?” Admiral Chegwidden raised an eyebrow at the two before he looked down at the folder on his desk and flipped through it, “Do you recall when Agent Gibbs was on medical leave for close to five months?”

Ziva and McGee exchanged looks, both wondering where the man was going with the question.

“Answer him!” Morrow snapped out.

Both jumped, but they weren’t the only ones; Vance jumped as well. The man had remained quiet as he listened to the three interrogate McGee and David. He had wanted to add his own input, but right now, he felt that the three of them were doing a pretty good job on their own. He would wait until the end before giving the decision he had already made.

He knew it would change the outcome of Gibbs’ team and the dynamic at NCIS and people may call him cold-hearted, but in all honesty, it was the only decision he could come to. Ok, it wasn’t the only one, but it was the one he felt right about making.

“Yes,” McGee answered with a nod.

“Do either of you remember how you acted towards Agent DiNozzo during that time?” Admiral Chegwidden asked, or rather, demanded. “Your actions were deplorable and filled with disrespect.”

“With all due respect,” Ziva shook her head, “We have never disrespected Tony.”

“You refused orders,” Hetty picked up as she looked through the folder, “left incomplete reports, left work early, on the scene you left Agent DiNozzo to do most of the work while the two of you did whatever you wanted and when reprimanded, you commented on how he was not Agent Gibbs and he should stop acting that way, you told him he wasn’t your boss.” She stopped when she saw the look on McGee’s face, “Do you have something to say Mr. McGee?”

“It wasn’t that we disrespected him” McGee said after sharing a look with Ziva, “At the time, we were just tired of the way he was acting.”

“And how exactly was he acting?” Morrow asked, his voice low and dangerous. It galled him to think that these two could stand there and actually try and reason their way out of they had done. They were actually making excuses for their actions towards DiNozzo when there was no excuse.

“Well,” McGee said, “sometimes it was as if he was trying to be Gibbs. He was acting like he knew better. We were all capable of being in charge, but—

“But nothing,” Hetty cut him off, “It doesn’t matter if you were capable of being the boss, that wasn’t the issue. What the two of you failed to grasp was the concept that not only has Agent DiNozzo been an agent longer than the both of you, but he _is_ the Senior Field Agent, and as such, in the absence of Agent Gibbs, he _was_ in charge and you should’ve treated him as such.”

McGee and Ziva were ashamed. They knew they hadn’t treated Tony right during Gibbs’ absence, but they had never made an effort to apologize or do better.

 “Did either of ever wonder just how your reports got done?” Morrow asked, “DiNozzo stayed back late every night to do the reports that the both of you _refused_ to do. He picked up the slack, helped everyone deal with Agent Gibbs’ absence and not once did he complain about it. He did his work, _your_ work and still gave in to former Director Sheppard’s demands to go undercover just to fulfil a personal vendetta.”

Shock covered their faces; they hadn’t known that.

“I take it by the looks on your faces you didn’t know that did you?” Hetty replied, “And how did you repay him? You treated him like a dog; as if he was incompetent and couldn’t do the job, _despite_ the fact that he had been doing it longer than either of you.”

“The both of you should’ve been written up for your actions then,” SECNAV said, “I don’t know why Agent DiNozzo didn’t report you, but even so, Director Sheppard should’ve paid better attention to her agents rather than focusing on her personal crusade.”

“And to top it all off,” Morrow added, “When Agent Gibbs returned, the both of you took great pleasure in reminding Agent DiNozzo of what you had repeatedly told him; that he wasn’t your boss and he could never be as good of a boss as Agent Gibbs was. And then this mess; Agent DiNozzo trusted the both of you. He was counting on you to be there for him and you let him down. You let this agency down.”

“Do either of you understand the seriousness of the situation?” Vance asked, “Or do you believe that you’re just going to get a reprimand and a suspension?”

The two looked away guiltily. That’s exactly what they had believed.

“You think that a suspension is the only punishment you should receive?” Admiral Chegwidden raised an eyebrow.

“I think we made a mistake,” Ziva said, “and yes, I know I have said that before and I know it was a mistake that should not have been made, but we have both been outstanding agents. This is the first and only time we have done something like this and I do not think we should lose our jobs over it.”

“Your actions resulted in a homicide,” Hetty stated.

“That was not our fault!” McGee protested.

“It’s called negligent homicide,” Hetty continued, “You may not have beaten that woman to death, but the fact of the matter is, if you _hadn’t_ turned off the radio, you would’ve known your partner was in trouble and that he needed help and that woman wouldn’t have been killed. So while you may not have directly caused her death, you could’ve stopped it.”

Neither McGee nor Ziva could say anything to that because she was right. If they hadn’t turned off the radio, Tony wouldn’t have ended up in the hospital and Vidalia would still have her mother.

“You’re right,” McGee nodded, “We never should’ve turned off the radio. Tony trusted us to have his back and not only that but we had a job to do. We broke protocol and because of that, people suffered and we will have that on our conscience for the rest of our lives. We made things even worse, when, instead of coming clean, we lied to our boss about what really happened and falsified our reports. We panicked and we messed up.”

“This job,” Ziva continued on, “it is everything to me. This place is my home and I do not wish to lose it.”

“You may not have a choice,” SECNAV frowned, “I will be honest. The both of you are very capable and very good at doing your jobs; I’m not sure I know of anyone that is able to move through the cyber world the way you do McGee and David, your Mossad background is an asset. However, the truth of the matter is, no matter how good you are, you broke protocol and you have to face the consequences for that.”

The phone rang, cutting off whatever reply was about to be made.

“Excuse me,” Vance said as he moved to answer it, “this is Vance.” He paused, “Send them in.”

Five minutes later, the door opened and Gibbs and Tony walked in.

Neither man looked at their former teammates.

“Agent Gibbs, Agent DiNozzo,” SECNAV greeted as did the others.

“Sirs, Madam,” Tony replied while Gibbs nodded.

McGee and Ziva stared at the two in shock and apprehension. They had had no idea Tony and Gibbs would be there and they were worried; the last time they saw Gibbs, he had ordered them off his team and to stay away from Tony.

Glancing at each other and then back at Gibbs and Tony—both of whom had unreadable expressions—McGee and Ziva had the same thoughts running through their minds;

_Why were they here? And what did it mean for their future at NCIS?_


	7. Outcome

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** Ok, so this is the last chapter. Enjoy!
> 
> **Disclaimer:** NCIS and all its affiliates belong to its creators Donald P. Bellisario and Don McGill, and CBS Television. No trademark or copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made from this. In other words, I DO NOT own.
> 
> “Speaking”  
>  _‘Thinking’  
>  “Speaking over the phone”_

_What we do does not define who we are; what defines us is how well we rise after falling--_ Unknown

 

_(Scene starts the morning after Gibbs and Tony’s talk)_

The next time Tony woke, he saw that it was morning and Gibbs was the only one in his room. The older man was reading a book and though he looked fully into it, Tony knew he was aware that he had woken up.

But since Gibbs didn’t seem incline to letting him know that he knew, he took the time to think on what had happened last night; he still couldn’t believe that he had confessed his feelings to the man. That was something he had never thought he’d do. He’d convinced himself that nothing would ever happen between them, but it seems he was wrong. Dead wrong.

Not only did he tell Gibbs how he felt, but Gibbs felt the same way, _and_ the man wanted them to give being a couple a try. It was everything he’d ever dreamed about but didn’t think he’d get.

“You done now?” Gibbs asked without raising his eyes from the book.

“Yeah,” Tony nodded. “So where is everybody?”

“Well Ducky and Palmer have to work,” Gibbs answered as he closed the book and put it on the table, “and dad took Abby and Vitalia for breakfast and probably home for her to take a shower and knowing, a  little shopping as well.”

Tony grinned, “Tell me about her.”

Gibbs raised an eyebrow, “Vitalia?”

“Yeah,” Tony nodded, “why is she here? I mean, I know you said she’s mine and you would explain…so…explain.”

“She’s here because you have custody of her,” Gibbs started. He went on to explain everything; he told him about the CPS worker and about Vitalia being with them. When he got to the part about what Vitalia’s mom had told her, Tony’s eyes went wide with disbelief.

“So her mother knew she would someday die at the hands of her husband and wanted to help her daughter move on from it,” Tony said. He dropped his eyes to his bed, unable to hold Gibbs’ gaze. Vitalia’s story reminded him too much of his own childhood.

A childhood filled with broken promises, drunken parents, beatings, neglect.

“She’s just like me, isn’t she?” Tony said softly, gaze still on the bed as his memories flashed across his mind.

“Hey,” Gibbs reached out and tipped the younger man’s chin up so that he was looking into his eyes, “Yeah she’s like you, she’ll survive what happened because she has you to guide her, as well as me and Ducky and Palmer and my dad. She’s a very lucky girl Tony.”

Tony let out a deep breath and his eyes slipped shut. Never in his life did he think he’d be in this position—a father. It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought it, because he had. He just never thought it _would_ happen. His father had told him over and over he wasn’t good enough to be a son and he definitely wasn’t good enough to be a father.

His ex-girlfriend, Melody Ford, had told him in a fit of drunken rage that she was glad she had had an abortion because she didn’t want to have a DiNozzo baby. But Melody hadn’t been finished; she had gone on to tell him that she had been sleeping with his father behind his back and had had no idea who the baby had, hence the reason for the abortion. It had nearly broken him. He had been devastated, and after a lot of thinking, he had resigned from the Peoria Police Department the following week and had left town.

Since Melody, he had pushed the thought of being a father deep, deep down. He was terrified to end up like his old man and deep down, he never thought he’d make a good enough one. What if he couldn’t do this? What if he messed up? Vitalia would be the one paying the price and his heart hurt at putting that little girl through more pain. He couldn’t do it.

“Tony,” Gibbs’ voice broke through his memories and panicked thoughts, “Look at me.”

Tony opened his eyes and locked gaze with the blue ones staring at him.

“You are _not_ your father,” Gibbs said firmly, “You’re a better man than him. You will _not_ mess this up, you understand me?”

“How can you be so sure Jethro?” Tony whispered. “I’ve never spent any time around kids. I don’t even like them.”

“Yes you do,” Gibbs countered, “You’re just afraid of hurting them; of turning out to be like your father.”

Tony looked away. Sometimes he really hated that the man knew him so well and could read his every thought.

“You won’t Tony,” Gibbs grabbed Tony’s chin and turned his face back towards his own, “you’re already a better father than Senior.” At Tony’s confused look, he smiled, “the fact that you’re worried about how you’ll treat Vitalia shows that. Plus, like I said earlier, you’ll have me by your side, as well as dad, Abby, Ducky and Palmer.”

Tony let out a deep, soft breath, “I love you; more than I ever thought I could love someone. You know about my past and my issues. I never really gave a thought to being a father, especially after I realized my preference leaned more towards men than women, but now, you’re giving me everything I didn’t think I would have, or deserve.”

Gibbs really hated Senior. If the man was in front of him right now, he’d put _him_ in the hospital bed. “You deserve it Tony; more than anyone else, you deserve it.”

Tony smiled, that brilliant smile of his, and reached out to grab Gibbs’ hand that was still holding his chin. Pressing a kiss to the palm, he sighed, “So, when do you think I’ll get out of here?”

“Getting antsy already?” Gibbs chuckled, not surprised in the least.

“Yes,” Tony nodded. He was about to continue but was cut off by the door opening.

Abby walked in, followed Jackson and Vitalia. “Gibbs, we’—Tony!”

Vitalia looked up, a smile on her face, and she hurried over to Gibbs’ side. After climbing onto his lap, she turned until she was facing Tony, “Hi Tony.”

Tony grinned, “Well hi there Bella Ragazza.” _(Pretty Girl)_

Vitalia giggled, “Are you ok now Tony?”

“I’m more than ok,” Tony nodded, “especially now that I see you. So, Jethro tells me you belong with me now.”

“Uh huh,” Vitalia nodded, her blue eyes sparkling with happiness, “I get to stay with you and LJ and Abby and Ducky and Gremlin and Grandpa Jack.”

Abby and Jackson laughed at Vitalia calling Palmer “Gremlin” while Gibbs shook his head.

“Nice,” Tony grinned, “So, do you wanna play a game?”

“Ok!” Vitalia bounced on Gibbs’ lap, “What game?”

“I’m gonna tell you something about me and you tell me the same thing about you,” Tony said, “like, my favourite colour is blue, what’s yours?”

“Pink,” Vitalia grinned.

“Mine is red,” Abby smiled, “but I like black a lot.”

“I know!” Vitalia giggled, “you have a lotta black.”

“I like maroon myself,” Jackson grinned.

Vitalia shifted to look up at Gibbs, “What about you LJ?”

Gibbs looked down at her before looking up at Tony’s face, “I like green.”

Tony’s cheeks flushed and he flashed a grin before turning his attention back to Vitalia, “Ok; what movies do you like?”

Vitalia’s face fell at the question.

Tony frowned, as did Abby and Jackson.

“Bella Ragazza?” Tony called softly. “What’s wrong?”

Vitalia bit her lip, “I don’t have no movie. Daddy don’t like me watching TV.”

Jackson’s eyes hardened, Abby’s went wide and Tony frowned; each of them were wishing the man was in front of them and not in jail, though he belonged there.

“Well,” Gibbs rubbed her arm, “You’re in luck because Tony loves movies. You can watch with him until you find a favourite.”

Tony’s eyes lit up, “Oh! We are gonna have so much fun! We’ll start with the classics; Hitchcock, Bogart, Gable—

“You are not showing her _Gone With the Wind,_ ” Gibbs interrupted making Abby and Jackson laugh.

“What’s wrong with it?” Tony defended. “It’s a good movie and a classic!”

Gibbs glared at him, “She’s too young to understand it.”

“But come on,” Tony continued, “Can you imagine her being a regular Scarlet O’Hara?” he stopped, looked at Vitalia and then shook his head with a frown, “No, no, no. You’re right; no _Gone With the Wind._ ”

The three adults broke up laughing and Vitalia looked at them in confusion. “I no watch movie no more?”

Tony looked at her, “Yes, just not that one.”

“Don’t worry Baby Doll,” Gibbs tugged gently on one of her pigtails, “there are plenty of Disney movies for you to see.”

The door opened and Dr. Pitt walked in.

“Well, isn’t this a party?” Brad grinned as he looked at the group.

“Hey Brad,” Tony greeted, “Please tell me I’m getting out of here soon.”

“You’re getting out of here soon,” Brad parroted causing the others to laugh.

“Doc,” Tony rolled his eyes.

“Ok,” Brad chuckled, “I am serious though. I just need to go over instructions.”

“And then I can leave?” Tony asked.

“Yes,” Brad nodded.

“Sweet!” Tony grinned, obviously excited at the idea of finally leaving the hospital. “So tell me; what do I have to do?”

“Well,” Brad started, “The sling over your right shoulder will be able to come off in a week, but no heavy lifting, because it’s still going to be pretty sore. The cast on your right hand will stay on for at least three more weeks, after which you’ll go to physical therapy.”

Tony groaned, “and that means I’ll have to redo my gun qualifications.”

“Did you expect any different DiNozzo?” Gibbs asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No boss,” Tony sighed, “Ok doc, continue.”

“As I’ve already told you,” Brad continued, “I recommend you staying home for two weeks, after which, you’re on desk duty and yes Tony, I’m still leaving when you’re off to Agent Gibbs.”

“Da—Crap,” Tony cut himself off when he saw Vitalia watching him intently. He had hoped Brad would’ve changed his mind, but unfortunately he had hoped too much.

“Cheer up Tony,” Abby grinned, “you get to go home today.” She looked at the doctor, “Right?”

“Yes,” Brad nodded. “He does, but again Tony; you have to take it easy.”

“He will,” Gibbs said and the tone in his voice said that Tony would do what he said or suffer the consequences.

“Good,” Brad knew that if there was anybody that could make Tony do what he was supposed to do, it was Gibbs. “Now, I’m going to get your release papers and your medications and then, you’re free to go.”

“Thank God,” Tony blew off. He was more than ready to leave the hospital.

The others laughed and Brad left the room and a nurse came in, “Good morning.”

“Morning,” everyone answered as one.

“So I hear you’re being released,” the nurse smiled at Tony as she walked over to his bed.

“Yes,” Tony nodded back with a smile, “Not that I haven’t enjoyed your company, but I really don’t want to be here another minute.”

“Understandable,” the nurse nodded. “I’m sure you want to use the bathroom, so why don’t I help you with that.”

“While you’re doing that,” Gibbs stood up with Vitalia.

“Where are you going?” Tony asked as he looked at his lover? No, they hadn’t done anything yet. And boyfriend sounded so—teenager…and yet, it still sent warmth through him to know that Gibbs was his boyfriend or significant other.

“You need clothes Tony,” Gibbs raised an eyebrow, “Or did you plan on leaving the hospital in that gown with your bare butt hanging out?”

“That’d be a sight to see,” Abby giggled, “I’m sure the nurse would appreciate it.”

The nurse flushed but didn’t comment. She couldn’t deny it—Tony DiNozzo was a very good looking man.

“Yes but I’m not sure Jethro would,” Jackson laughed. He knew his son and knew just how possessive he was of what he considered his and Tony was his; even before the change of status in their relationship. But now, now that they were together, that possessiveness would reach a whole new level.

Tony’s eyes brightened at that even as his cheeks pinked a bit. “Pick on the injured…I see how it is.”

“I’m sure you can more than handle it Tony,” the nurse chuckled.

Tony looked at her with a scandalized look, “Nurse Georgia! You’re supposed to be on the patient’s side.”

Georgia laughed; working this room always left in her a good mood. Tony was a funny guy and the people in this room, including the guy in glasses and the older man, were as close as family, maybe even closer than some families. 

“Tony behave!” Vitalia spoke up, “You be nice or we no get clothes.”

The room went quiet for a second before everyone started laughing.

Georgia grabbed on to the edge of the bed so she wouldn’t collapse to the floor as Abby held on to Jackson and Gibbs held on to the little girl in his arms.

“You tell him V,” Abby giggled.

“We should get going,” Gibbs said after he got himself under control, “And Tony, you heard Vitalia; behave.”

With that, he motioned for Abby and Jackson to follow him out of the room.

“Bye Tony,” Vitalia waved. The only reason she wasn’t staying was because LJ told her she could help for when Tony came home.

~…~

Tony let out a sigh as he settled back against the couch. He was beyond happy to be out of the hospital.

“You ok?” Vitalia asked as she crawled up onto the couch next to him.

“I’m fine Bella Ragazza,” Tony smiled down at her, “Just took a bit out of me, that’s all.”

Vitalia hummed and cuddled close to his side.

Tony couldn’t help but to smile as he wrapped his left arm around her shoulders, pulling her even closer to him.

“No more hospital? You ok now?” Vitalia asked.

“No more hospital,” Tony assured her, “I’m staying right here—with you and Jethro.”

“Good,” Vitalia nodded, “I don’t like hospitals.”

“Me neither,” Tony agreed with a chuckle.

“Hello?!” Abby called out as she opened the door.

“Hey Abs,” Tony smiled at the Goth.

“Hey Tony,” Palmer greeted as he and Ducky followed Abby.

“How are you feeling Anthony?” Ducky asked as he sat down across from Tony and Vitalia.

“I’m good,” Tony said, knowing Ducky wouldn’t take any half-truths or lies and even if he had lied, Gibbs would’ve told the truth anyways, “Gibbs already gave me my medication.”

Ducky nodded in acceptance.

“So what are we doing today?” Jackson asked as he and Gibbs walked into the room.

Gibbs leaned against the fireplace as Jackson took up a seat in the empty chair.

“We could have a barbecue,” Abby suggested, “a last minute one; do some quick shopping, get the stuff and Gibbs can get the grill going.”

“That sounds good,” Palmer smiled.

“What do you think Gibbs?” Abby turned to said man, knowing how he liked his privacy and how he steered clear of anything remotely group related.

Gibbs looked at his father, Ducky, Palmer and Abby and then his gaze shifted to Tony and Vitalia who were watching him with bright eyes and he knew he couldn’t say no. “Sounds good.”

“Yes!” Abby jumped out. “Ok, so we’ll go get the stuff, Gibbs you can get the grill going and Vitalia, you keep Tony company and make sure he doesn’t do anything to hurt his arm.”

“Ok,” Vitalia nodded, “No moving Tony.”

“Yes ma’am,” Tony smiled down at the little girl.

Everyone set out to do their jobs while Tony relaxed his body on the couch with Vitalia. Giggles and soft talking was heard every few minutes and Gibbs grinned to himself every time.

~…~

As the day disappeared and the sky darkened, Tony and Gibbs found themselves in the living room alone.

Abby, Ducky and Palmer had left a few hours ago and Jackson had taken Vitalia up to get her ready for bed.

“McGee and Ziva’s disciplinary hearing is coming up,” Gibbs said as they were getting ready to watch TV.

Tony froze and said nothing. “Oh?” he replied, faking a casualness that he didn’t feel.

“Vance called to let me know,” Gibbs continued, not buying the act for a moment.

“Why would he do that?” Tony asked.

“To keep me in the loop,” Gibbs said, “and because he wants us there.”

Tony turned to look at Gibbs in shock, “Why do I have to be there? As far as I’m concerned, if I don’t see their faces ever again, I’m good.”

“He wants everyone to hear from you and also,” Gibbs paused.

“What Jethro?” Tony prompted, knowing it was something possibly big to make Gibbs hesitate.

“Their future at NCIS,” Gibbs revealed, “he wants your decision on it. I’ve already made my own decision clear, but it was you who suffered the most.”

“I already know what I decide,” Tony said immediately.

Gibbs raised an eyebrow. He knew Tony and he knew that the decision the young man was done out of pain and anger. His own decision had been a snap one, but he’d had days—two weeks even—to think about it and he knew he wasn’t changing his mind.

“I know,” Gibbs nodded, “but I also know you have a huge heart and an amazing capacity to forgive wrongs done to you.”

Tony looked away at the words because he knew it was true.

“I don’t want you to make this decision and then regret it,” Gibbs said.

“What about you? Will you regret yours?” Tony asked.

“This isn’t about me,” Gibbs shook his head, “At least, not entirely; this is about you. I can’t make this decision for you Tony and I wouldn’t be the man you loved if I allowed you to use me as the deciding factor in something like this. You need to think it over, I mean really think it over.”

He stood up from the couch, “I’m gonna go check on Vitalia.” He leaned over and kissed Tony briefly on the lips, “Whatever decision you come up with, I’ll stand by you.”

With that, he headed for the stairs, leaving Tony sitting by himself, lost in thought.

~…~

Over the course of the next few days, Tony’s mind was more on the upcoming hearing and the decision he had to make it.

It wasn’t easy as he had thought it would be. Gibbs was right; while he was hurt over what they did, he wasn’t the type to hold on to grudges. He always forgave whoever hurt him, even if they didn’t deserve it. Case in point—his father.

But this was different. He could’ve died because McGee and Ziva had decided that it was better to ignore him, to close communications between them and him.

He was hurt and angry and he wanted to hate them, he wanted them to lose everything, but he wasn’t that kind of person. He couldn’t in good conscience make them lose their jobs because he knew that despite this incident, they _were_ good agents. But the thing of it is, he couldn’t trust them.

The trust he had had in them disappeared the moment he found out what had happened and he didn’t think it would ever come back or if it did, it wouldn’t be the same.

“Trust is like a mirror—you can fix it if it’s broke, but you’ll always see the cracks in the reflection,” Tony said softly as he dropped his head back on the couch.

“Truer words have never been spoken,” Gibbs said as he walked into the room. He sat down on the couch, before lying down and then he gestured to Tony, “Come here.”

Tony smiled and moved to lie next to Gibbs with his head pillowed on the man’s shoulder and his injured hand on Gibbs’ stomach.

Gibbs ran a hand up and down Tony’s back in a soothing gesture. “What are you thinking?”

Tony sighed, “I don’t know. Jethro, what they did, it hurt like hell. It still hurts! But, I can’t be the reason either one of them don’t have a job. Despite this, _incident_ , they’re good agents; I mean, I haven’t met anyone with McGee’s skills on a computer and Ziva—she was Mossad for crying out loud!” another sigh, “What am I going to do? What am I going to say?”

Gibbs pressed a kiss to the top of his head, “I can’t answer that for you Tony.”

Tony looked down at the cast on his wrist, “How can I look them in the face after what they did? Because of them, Vitalia’s mother is dead, and I almost lost my life. How do you forgive something like that?”

“I don’t know,” Gibbs replied, although he knew Tony didn’t need an answer.

Tony was silent for a while and then, he snorted, “I don’t think it matters much anyways.”

Gibbs frowned when he heard that, “Why do you say that?”

“Do you really think Vance is gonna give up those two?” Tony asked, keeping his eyes on Gibbs’ chest where their fingers were intertwined, “I know you said I would have a say, but when it comes down to it, the final decision is up to Vance to keep them or not and we know how Vance feels about the two of them, especially about McGee; he thinks McGee is the future.”

“Tony,” Gibbs started, “what those two did, it not only went against protocol of NCIS but against basically every agency’s protocol. Even if Vance wanted to keep them on, it wouldn’t look good.”

“You know that and I know that,” Tony huffed, “but the truth is, Vance could very well just give them both a slap on the wrist; maybe training of some kind, maybe demote McGee back to Cyber-Crimes for a few months, but he’s going to keep them as NCIS agents.”

He went silent for a few minutes before continuing softly, “For a long while, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life; all I knew was that it had to be something completely different to my father because I never wanted to be a business man like him. Then I got into sports and football and after that career ended, I became a cop and I realized I was good at it and it became something I loved. Moved around for a bit and then I met a stubborn, hard-ass bastard of a man who all but ordered me to join him.”

“Can’t imagine why you would do what that man said,” Gibbs grinned.

Tony chuckled, “At the time, I didn’t know why either, but looking back, I do. For the first time, someone saw more in me—they saw potential. And of course I was completely attracted to you. The point I’m trying to make, but I’m going all over, is that, this is my home and I love being here, but I’m not sure I can do this Jethro.”

“Do what?” Gibbs asked, though he already knew the answer.

“I can’t stay at NCIS if they’re still gonna be there,” Tony admitted softly and a little reluctantly, “They were my teammates and when I trusted them to have my back, they let me down. A part of me wants to forgive them and for them to still have their jobs and for us to work on being teammates and trusting each other.”

“And the other part?” Gibbs asked and again, he didn’t really need to as he knew the answer to that as well.

“The other, well, the other part of me hates them and wants them to be punished for what they did,” Tony said, “I want them to lose their jobs.”

Gibbs didn’t say anything to that because he felt the same way. Instead, he tightened his grip on Tony, being careful of his injuries, and worked on soothing the young man.

From his position out of sight, Jackson settled against the wall and let his mind wander. He agreed with both his son and Tony and he also knew that if the two in question stayed on at NCIS, then the agency would lose its two best agents because he knew Tony wouldn’t stay and there was no way his son would either as he knew Jethro wouldn’t be able to trust anyone else but Tony to have his back.

From what he knew of Vance, he knew Tony was spot on with his descriptions, but what he’d seen of the last few days had given him another view of the man and he hoped, he really did, that Vance would make the right decision.

~…~

The next two weeks passed by faster than Tony was ready for; the main reason being he wasn’t sure he was completely ready for McGee and Ziva’s hearing.

But ready he had to be because today was the day of reckoning. It was a weekday—Friday to be exact—but Abby had been given the day off from work to stay with Vitalia. Jackson had had to go back to Stillwater and had left two days ago but had promised that he’d be making trips in the future to spend time with them, especially Vitalia.

Now, Tony was in his and Gibbs’ bedroom— _that_ thought still made him all warm inside, to be able to say that—trying to figure out what to wear, but he knew it was just a stalling tactic. They had to be an NCIS in a half an hour.

“Perchè non posso venire con te?” Vitalia asked. She was sitting on the bed staring at Tony with a petulant expression. _(Why I can’t come with you?)_

“Perchè mia bella ragazza,” Tony replied as he looked in the mirror, “anche se vorrei tanto portarti come, non posso. Sono cose da grandi e verranno dette cose che i bambini non devono sentire.” _(Because Pretty Girl, as much as I would love to take you with me, I can’t. It’s grownup stuff and not one for your ears.)_

Vitalia scowled, not really understanding everything he said but knowing what she did get she didn’t like. “Ma voglio venire con te e LJ.” _(But I wanna go with you and LJ.)_

Ever since Tony came home from the hospital just over two weeks ago, she had been pretty much glued to his side. She rarely let him out of her sight.

Tony turned towards her and held back the grin at the look on her face. He had a feeling if he told how cute she looked pouting it wouldn’t go over well. As he sat next to her on the bed, he realized with a happy feeling that being a father wasn’t as terrifying as he had feared. He attributed it to Gibbs’ presence and love and patience and _experience._

“So che non vuoi che io vada via,” Tony said, “E anch’io non voglio lasciarti, maè una cosa che devo fare.” He gently prodded a finger into her side, making her jump as the move tickled her. He could see she was trying not to smile, “Ti piache Abby, giusto?” _(I know you don’t want me to leave you. And I don’t want to leave you either, but this is something I have to do. You like Abby, don’t you?)_

“Sì,” Vitalia nodded. _(Yes)_

“E ti piace stare con le,” Tony continued, “Sono sicuro che vi divertirete insieme. Sai cosa ti dico—se non fai i caprici e cercherai divertirti con Abby, cuando torno a casa, andremo a prendere il gelato. ” _(And you like being around her. So I know the two of you will have fun. Tell you what—if you don’t throw a tantrum and you have fun with Abby, then when I get home, we’ll go out for ice cream.)_

Vitalia stared at Tony for a few minutes and then she nodded, with all the seriousness of a four year old, “Ok, ma fai in fretta e tre palline.” _(Ok, but you be quick and three scoops)_

“D’accordo,” Tony laughed and stood up, lifting her off the bed with his uninjured arm, prompting giggles from the little girl. _(Deal)_

The two made their way downstairs and to the kitchen where Gibbs was.

“All done?” Gibbs asked when he saw them.

“Yep,” Tony nodded, “Although, someone was being a little difficult.”

Gibbs walked over to the two and grabbed Vitalia from Tony’s arms, “Are you being naughty?”

“No,” Vitalia shook her head with a giggle.

“Are you going to be a good girl for Abby?” Gibbs asked.

“Uh huh,” Vitalia nodded.

“Guys?”

“In here Abby!” Tony shouted back.

Abby walked into the kitchen and smiled at the three of them, “Hey.”

“Hey,” Tony smiled, “thanks for watching her.”

“No problem,” Abby grinned, “I love spending time with her.” she walked over to Gibbs and took Vitalia from him, “You and I are going to have a lot of fun.”

“Just don’t burn the house down,” Tony warned with a grin. “And I don’t want to come back and she has a tattoo.”

“Tony!” Abby smacked his arm, “I would never.” She grinned, “I’ll wait until she’s eighteen.”

Tony groaned, “Oh God…I can see it now.”

Gibbs chuckled and pushed Tony out the kitchen. “We’ll be back in a few hours Abby.”

Though the smile stayed on her face, Abby’s eyes darkened a bit—she knew where they were going and why, “Alright.”

Giving the Goth and little girl one last goodbye, Gibbs and Tony left.

~…~

 The moment they had stepped inside the building, Tony had been greeted with well-wishers and friendly smiles. It warmed his heart to know that he had been so missed by everyone. When he got to the bullpen, the same thing happened again and of course, him being Tony, he couldn’t help but to play it up, causing Gibbs to shake his head and the other agents to laugh.

Even as they took the stairs up to MTAC, Tony was still smiling and waving and making jokes. They gave a nod to Cynthia and came to a stop outside the doors.

“Are you ready for this?” Gibbs asked looking at his SFA and lover.

Tony took a deep breath and let it out slowly, “Not really, but it needs to be done.”

Gibbs said nothing, he just stared at him for a few more minutes before giving a nod and opening the door.

They walked in and neither man looked at their former teammates. They kept their gazes on the screen before them.

“Agent Gibbs, Agent DiNozzo,” the SECNAV greeted as did the others.

“Sirs, Madam,” Tony replied while Gibbs nodded.

“Agent DiNozzo, Agent Gibbs, you both know why you’re here,” Vance spoke up.

“Yes sir,” Tony nodded.

“Agent DiNozzo,” Hetty said, “I would like to know what happened that day from your point of view.”

“Well,” Tony started, “We were trying to find a voice match…” he told them the same thing he had told Vance and Gibbs when he was the hospital; both McGee and Ziva had surprised looks on their faces as he explained why he had chosen himself to go door to door, but he ignored and he also ignored their looks when he came to the part about his mother’s scent, the plague, however, when he explained why he had kept talking, he found he couldn’t ignore them then and instead, he turned towards them and explained it all, never taking his eyes off of them.

It was only when he was done, did he take his eyes off of them and turn back to the screen.

For their part, the shame and guilt they thought they had dealt with came back full force in McGee and Ziva—when they had been acting selfishly, Tony had been thinking about them, he had been putting them first and how had they repaid him? They almost got him killed.

“Tony,” McGee took a step towards the Italian, but stopped when he saw the glare on not only Tony’s face, but the one on Gibbs’ as well. “I am so sorry for what I did. We never should’ve done it— _I_ never should’ve done it. You trusted us to have your back and not only that, we were supposed to be doing our jobs and we didn’t. We screwed up.”

Ziva went next, “he is right. We had a job to do and we were supposed to do it.”

“And you think saying ‘I’m sorry’ is supposed to fix everything?” Tony asked, his green eyes hard—a look neither McGee nor Ziva had ever seen before. “Just because you apologized, you think everything is going to be ok now?”

“No,” McGee said as Ziva shook her head.

“Well you’re right,” Tony said, “I trusted you. I expected you to have my back and you didn’t. And it’s not that you went against the protocol of this agency, but that you broke one of Gibbs’ rules, one of _our_ rules; never leave your partner without backup. And you did _exactly_ that. If you had personal issues with me, it never should’ve made its way in the middle of doing our jobs.”

“We don’t have any issues with you Tony,” McGee interrupted. His heart felt so heavy with everything, especially with the complete betrayal on Tony’s face—it tore him to pieces.

“You could’ve fooled me,” Tony scoffed.

“Tony,” Ziva said, “You’re our partner and we are very sorry for what we did and you are wrong. We do not have any issues with at all.”

“And if we go back to the points we touched on earlier?” Morrow asked, drawing their attention. “Past actions have suggested opposite.”

“We’ve explained that,” McGee said.

“Have you?” Hetty looked at him, “I don’t recall that you did.”

“If I may ask a question Agent DiNozzo,” SECNAV spoke up.

“Yes sir?” Tony nodded.

“During former Director Sheppard’s reign,” SECNAV asked, “When Agent Gibbs was on leave, you were placed in charge, however, both McGee and David had some difficulties accepting this as they thought you were acting too much like Agent Gibbs and thought that you should stop because you are not Agent Gibbs and from what I incur, they didn’t think you were suitable enough to be the lead. Why did you act the way you did?”

Tony went silent as he thought on the time Gibbs had been in Mexico.

“Agent DiNozzo?” Hetty called.

“Sorry ma’am,” Tony shook his head slightly, “I guess I was trying to make them feel better. I knew I wasn’t Agent Gibbs, but I wasn’t truly trying to be him. What I was doing at the time was to try and make everything as normal as possible. While the others had thought that Gibbs wouldn’t return, I knew he would’ve and I was just trying to keep the team going until he did.”

He turned to look at the two, “As for the other—it doesn’t surprise me that they think I shouldn’t have been in charge, I mean, none of them think I should even _be_ Gibbs’ SFA despite the fact that I’ve worked here longer than any of them and that I have more training as an NCIS agent than they do.”

“We do know that Tony,” Ziva said, not liking the tone in Tony’s voice. In the years that she’s known, she’s never heard him sound so…so defeated, so wary.

“I know we’ve said it a lot, but what we did, it really was a mistake,” McGee said, “one we regret more than anything.” He paused, “But, I don’t— _sigh_ —I am _so_ sorry Tony and nothing I can say will change what happened, but, is it worth—

“You are not doing what I think you’re doing?” Gibbs cut him off with a growl, speaking for the first time since entering the room.

McGee turned startled eyes to his boss. “What?”

“Are you really going to stand there and guilt Tony into helping you keep your job?” Gibbs demanded.

McGee and Ziva looked at each other—they seemed to be doing that a lot lately—and then turned sheepish eyes back to the room.  That’s exactly what they had planned on doing. They didn’t want to lose their jobs and they figured that Tony would be the best bet in making sure that didn’t happen.

Tony took a deep breath and let it out; it seems as if the betrayal just wouldn’t stop. Even after everything they had done, they still expected him to save their jobs. Ignoring both Ziva and McGee, he turned back to the screen, “What they did, it was unprofessional and they pretty much broke every rule, but despite that, they are good at their jobs. I’ve worked with them for years now and I know just how good they are; without his computer skills, we never would’ve solved half our crimes as quickly as we did and Ziva—her Mossad training comes in very handy. NCIS is lucky to have them and our team has benefited from them being on it. As for what happened, I forgive them for it.”

Ziva and McGee weren’t the only ones shocked at Tony’s words—everyone else except Gibbs, was shocked as well. None of them could believe that Tony was actually defending the two, pleading their case.

McGee and Ziva’s shock turned to relief; they knew the kind of person Tony was and they knew he would forgive them and that he wouldn’t be comfortable with being the reason they didn’t have their jobs.

That relief was short lived.

“However,” Tony continued, “my forgiving them, doesn’t mean everything is ok.” he paused, “I understand that both of them have valuable skills to NCIS, but, if they stay, then I won’t—I can’t. They broke my trust in them when they chose to leave me without backup and I can’t work with someone I don’t trust. If McGee and Ziva remain as agents at NCIS, then, I quit.”

The room went silent. No one was able to believe what they had just heard—not even Gibbs.

Vance looked at Gibbs, trying to read him, but gave up when he realized how futile that was. When Gibbs locked down, only one person could read him and that person was standing right next to him with his own blank expression.

“Tony,” McGee swallowed to wet his dry throat. This is not what he expected to happen. Tony couldn’t quit.

“No,” Tony shook his head, “this is my job and I love it, but I can’t work with you or with Ziva because I don’t know if the next time you decide I’m being too immature, it’ll result in something even worse and I can’t take that chance. I trusted you and you broke it.”

McGee flinched at the words and Ziva’s eyes darkened.

“We are friends, yes?” Ziva asked, “And friends hurt each other, but they do not lose their friendships. We can fix this, can we not?”

“Trust is like a mirror—you can fix it if it’s broke, but you’ll always see the cracks in the reflection,” Tony repeated the words he had said to Gibbs a few days ago. “I will never be able to fully trust you the way I used to.”

Ziva bowed her head as the words washed over her and the feeling of loss sunk in.

“And how can I do my job if I’m worried whether or not my teammates will have my back?” Tony asked.

Neither McGee nor Ziva nor any of the others actually could answer the question.

“Agent Gibbs,” Chegwidden called out, “do you have anything to add?”

“No,” Gibbs answered, “I already told the Director I don’t want them back on my team. I don’t care where he sends them.”

Even though they already knew that, hearing the words again from Gibbs left McGee and Ziva reeling with hurt.

“Is that all you needed from me sirs, madam?” Tony asked.

“Yes,” Vance nodded, “you and Agent Gibbs may wait outside.”

Giving one last nod, Tony and Gibbs left the room. When the door closed behind them, all eyes turned to McGee and Ziva.

“Leon,” Hetty said, “before you read the decision to both, there is something I would like them to know.”

“Go ahead,” Vance nodded.

“I looked through Agent DiNozzo’s file,” Hetty continued, “And do you know what I found? Awards, recommendations and medals. How can someone whom you both think does not deserve his position receive all these if he wasn’t doing a good job? Did you know that Agent DiNozzo received a job offer to lead his own team?”

McGee and Ziva were completely shocked.

“We didn’t know that,” McGee stammered out.

“No, of course you didn’t,” Hetty mused, “The offer came after Agent Gibbs returned from Mexico.”

“Why did he turn it down?” Ziva asked, unable to believe or understand why Tony would give up the offer to lead his own team.

“He felt that Agent Gibbs hadn’t fully returned to where he was before the accident and he knew he would need him,” Hetty said.

“Oh,” Ziva said softly.

“I know the both of you are wondering where you stand now,” Vance spoke up, “so let me tell you. Effective Immediately, you are both no longer working at NCIS.”

“What?” Ziva and McGee were stunned.

“Do you really think,” SECNAV spoke up, “that anyone here will want to work with you after what you did to Agent DiNozzo? Do you think any of them will trust you to have their backs? They won’t.”

“I understand we have to be punished,” McGee said, “but why do we have to leave NCIS? I could go back to cybercrimes. And Ziva could work as a training officer.”

“That could’ve worked,” Vance said, “but unfortunately for you, that is not an option. It seems as if you don’t really understand the severity of everything; no one wants to work with either one of you—not the cybercrimes team nor the officers at FLETC. You are both persona non grata here.”

“You should be serving time for the negligent homicide,” Chegwidden added on, “however, due to your past actions and the fact that this is the first time something like this has happened, you will instead serve one hundred hours of community service each and you will be on probation for three months.”

“I am sorry to see NCIS lose two of its best agents,” Hetty said, “but this is something that cannot be brushed off or receive a simple slap on the wrist. We have an image to uphold and it would not put NCIS in a favourable light to know that something as serious as this was not treated as such.”

“When you leave here today,” Vance said, “you will no longer be allowed on NCIS property unless directed otherwise by myself or Agent Gibbs. Is that understood?”

“Yes,” McGee and Ziva nodded, too numb with shock to do or say anything else.

“You’re both lucky you’re not facing jail time,” Morrow frowned at the two.

“You are dismissed,” Vance said, “collect whatever you may still have here and leave the premises.”

Still reeling from what had just happened, the two turned and left the room.

Vance let out a sigh when the door closed behind them.

“This was unavoidable Leon,” SECNAV said, “We couldn’t have done anything else.”

“I know sir,” Vance turned towards the screen, “because of their actions, the best team we’ve ever seen is over. And I still don’t think either one of them fully understand just what they have done.”

“It’s a shame,” Hetty sighed.

“Yes it is,” Morrow nodded in agreement.

~…~

Outside, McGee and Ziva leaned against the wall.

“What just happened McGee?” Ziva asked looking at her friend and former teammate.

“We were fired,” McGee replied softly still in shock over the outcome. “We just lost our jobs.”

“How is this possible?” Ziva’s dark eyes were filled with emotions and had a glossy sheen to it.

“It’s possible because you two screwed up big time,” Gibbs said, startling the two as they had never heard him walk up to them. Tony was with him, but the Italian was pretty much ignoring them.

“Tony,” McGee leaned off the wall and took a step in Tony’s direction.

“No,” Tony stepped back, “don’t. I told you McGee, nothing you could ever say would change what happened. I trusted you and you pretty much through it back in my face. What have I ever done to either of you to deserve what you did to me?”

“It was nothing like that Tony,” Ziva moved off the wall as well, now filled with a need to get Tony to understand, to somehow earn his trust back.

“Really?” Tony scoffed, “You know what? I think I’ve heard all I needed to hear. I’m done.”

With that, he turned and walked away, leaving three people staring after him.

“I hope you both realize just what your actions have caused you,” Gibbs said, pulling their attention off of Tony and to him, “You not only lost your jobs, but you’ve lost some really good friendships.”

Having said his piece, Gibbs walked away from the duo and not once did he look back. If he had, he would’ve seen both Ziva and McGee with tears running down their cheeks.

~…~

Abby looked up when she heard the door opened and bit her lip when she took in Tony’s appearance. She quickly got up off the couch and went over to him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pulled him into a hug. “Are you ok?”

“I’m not sure,” Tony admitted. Ever since he’d woken up in the hospital, he’d been a lot more open with emotions, especially around her and Gibbs.

“What happened?” Abby pulled back from the hug and glanced between the two men.

“They were fired,” Gibbs revealed as he sat down. He told her everything that happened and then went silent when he was done.

“Oh,” Abby looked down. She was still angry over what Ziva and McGee did, but it still hurt to know that she would lose two friendships.

“It’s ok Abby,” Tony said softly as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her to his side, “What they did hurt, but I’m still going to miss them.”

“Tony!” Vitalia came running into the room, pulling the three out of their maudlin mood.

“Bella Ragazza,” Tony grinned as he caught her in his arms.

“You’re home,” Vitalia wrapped her arms around Tony’s neck and smiled at him.

“Yep,” Tony nodded.

“You stayed forever and ever Tony,” Vitalia pouted and Gibbs chuckled.

“I’m sorry princess,” Tony kissed her cheek, “but LJ and I are home now.”

“And if I remember right,” Gibbs said as he stood up, “Someone promised you ice cream if you were a good girl.”

Vitalia’s eyes lit up, “I was a good girl.”

“Was she Abby?” Tony asked.

“V was the absolute best,” Abby grinned; she wanted ice cream too.

Gibbs stared at her with a knowing smile but just shook his head.

“See Tony,” Vitalia nodded, “I was good. Ice cream now?”

“Yes Bella Ragazza,” Tony chuckled, “We’ll get ice cream now.”

“Hello?”

They turned to the door to see Palmer and Ducky.

“Hey guys,” Tony smiled, “what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at work?”

“The Director sent us home early,” Ducky said, “and we thought we’d ask if you wanted to have dinner.”

“We’re basically done for the rest of the day,” Palmer grinned, “we won’t get the results of our case back until Monday, we got off early.”

“Nice,” Abby grinned. “So, where to?”

“What do you want to eat?” Tony asked Vitalia.

“Spaghetti!” Vitalia giggled, “and then, ice cream!”

“Spaghetti it is,” Gibbs nodded.

“Ooh, can we go to Olive Garden?” Abby asked as she grabbed her jacket.

“We should!” Palmer agreed, “They have amazing breadsticks.”

That spurred a topic about other food at Olive Garden and soon, their air was filled with the lively chatter of the group.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N 2:** so what did you think? Don't worry, a sequel is already planned...just needs to be written, or finished written. Thanks to everyone who was interested in this and who reviewed or just liked it. You guys are awesome!

**Author's Note:**

>  **A/N:** so, what did you guys think? Review so I can know...


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